Very long story short.....I split with my dc dad 5 years ago. Was a horrible relationship but we are civil now. One of the main issues was his mother. My ex was dumb and selfish but his mother is extremely bitter and spiteful. She would enable a lot of his terrible behaviour - when he stole money from me it was my fault, when he cheated it was because I wasn't doing enough at home. That sort of thing. She was constantly coming to our house, outstaying her welcome and criticising. Then going away and slagging me off to the rest of the family. She lies and manipulates to get her way and is in complete denial about her behaviour.
Thankfully I don't have a lot to do with her now but she still causes problems. The latest is that during lockdown she's been pestering my ex to let her see dc when they are visiting his house. I know he will give in. She doesn't care less about my wishes or the rules and risks.
She's also equally vile to my ex's new partner who I have a good relationship with. She has been really good for my ex and the kids but I'm worried the ex MIL will drive her away. I also worry about the influence MIL will have on my kids. She's not the sort of person you'd want around your kids, awful racist homophobic views. Not a good word to say about anyone and I imagine she will drip poison in their ears about me as they get older.
Sorry for the rant I guess even after all this time I still feel quite anxious and upset about her behaviour and am concerned about how it might impact my dc. There's no use talking to my ex as he doesn't see it. There's nothing I can do is there?