Anger as stage of grief

[sadanddisheartened]

Is is possible to get to this stage nearly a year after the death. My parent died last July just 10 weeks after being diagnosed with brain cancer. I obviously done a lot of crying in those 10 weeks and maybe a few days after they died. I have had a few teary moments from then, Christmas, birthdays etc.
However this past few days I have been so angry at the fact that they had just turned 65, I should have had another 20 years or so with them, my little one should have had so much more time with them.
Is this normal, I though anger was one of the earlier stages but I honestly have not felt this much anger before.

It’s tough but you will come through it, take it from me (I lost both parents to cancer, one decades younger than 65).

I found the book helpful and would say you should go easy on yourself and make a point of being as happy as you can be and doing the things you want to do, now (it has really been driven home to me that sometimes there is no later).

Lynda07 I'm 43. Don't think age matters much when a parent is gone. There is no age that you are ready for them to leave. I find myself thinking now if I die at the same age then I have 22 years to go, my little one will be 31. It just puts life and death into reality if you know what I mean

Grief is not linear, and I don't really like the terminology of "stages" like it's something you progress through and then it all neatly goes away - there are just elements of grief. Sometimes they visit one after the other, sometimes together, sometimes they go away for a while and then revisit you.

Grief is never really "done". It simply changes.

ParkheadParadise Today is the anniversary of my miscarriage, I can't imagine the pain of losing a child though.

Numb is the exact word. I didn't feel overly sad in the weeks after the funeral, but I didn't feel overly anything. Numb just fits it perfectly.

Could I recommend something? There's a podcast by comedian Carriad Lloyd called griefcast. Comedians talking about death. Listening to it is like being in a club and something that is made very clear is that 1. stages of grief theory is bollocks and 2. grief can hit anytime and you can feel anything you feel.

Notthetoothfairy I did get very - not sure if selfish is the right word, but I did start putting myself first. Normally if I needed something but my husband or son wanted something I got their want first but I stopped all that. It sort of put the saying about life not being a rehearsal into perspective. I seen how quick things could change, how plans for the future could all change.

user1635482648 Thank you, that makes it easier for me to understand. I kept hearing time will make it better and it anything time seems to be making me worse.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale Thank you, I shall check that out, sounds like it might be useful.

Grief is never really "done". It simply changes.

This is so true.