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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Men

26 replies

Usernamesavailable · 23/05/2020 10:23

Aibu? So iv been seeing someone pre lol down. Spends literally a month at mine. Know each other 15 years. Now this weekend he's driven 45 mins to a big city to stay at my exs house, no reason, no social distancing. Aibu to say something? He's not welcome in my house for at least 2 weeks. We are a vulnerable house hold. He has been doing all my shopping etc and now I dunno what to do. Arrgghhh men

OP posts:
formerbabe · 23/05/2020 10:25

Your post is really confusing

puppypuppypuppypuppy · 23/05/2020 10:26

Can't make head nor tail of what you actually mean.

MashedSpud · 23/05/2020 10:28

How can you not understand? Bloody hell.

Get an online shopping slot op.

pictish · 23/05/2020 10:29

Well I don’t know. How long had you been seeing him pre lockdown?

Windyatthebeach · 23/05/2020 10:31

Not sure I would want a bf who hung out with my exh tbh...
CV aside!

HappyPunky · 23/05/2020 10:31

Your current partner has gone to stay with your ex?

Yanbu tell him to stay away, book an online shop and try deliveroo for groceries.

pictish · 23/05/2020 10:33

I think your post is easily decipherable btw.

You started seeing him before the lockdown.
He has been living with you for a month.
Now he has decided to visit/stay with your ex partner (I’ll,assume they are friends).
You don’t want him back to your house because mixing households etc.

Yanbu - but also, a month is a long time to spend cooped up with a new romantic prospect.

PurpleDaisies · 23/05/2020 10:34

This is a bit confusing.

Is your boyfriend a long term friend of your ex?

pictish · 23/05/2020 10:35

An observation which I know might be inaccurate, is that it’s not great to come to rely on a bloke so readily. At this stage you should be fully independent of him. Shop online.

LonginesPrime · 23/05/2020 10:39

He has been doing all my shopping etc and now I dunno what to do. Arrgghhh men

Well, what did you do in the month before he stayed with you?

You can't expect to own him just because he stayed at your for a while! Perhaps he needs a break from all the 'shopping, etc'.

Also, this doesn't seem related to the fact he's a man - you're cross with one particular individual who happens to be male and it's all men's fault?

LagunaBubbles · 23/05/2020 10:40

So your boyfriend is staying with your ex boyfriend. Cosy.

BumpBundle · 23/05/2020 10:42

I'm also confused by your post. I think there's a lot of context missing. If he's been living with you for a month did he move in mid-lockdown? If he's living with you then what difference does it make whether he shops or you shop unless you are vulnerable (you've said someone in your house is vulnerable but it doesn't sound like it's you)? Why did he go and stay with you ex? Did you know he was going? If you did know, why didn't you say something before he went? If you didn't know then how did you not know? Did he sneak out? Does he know your ex well? Why can't you get an online shop delivered? Why is this "men"'s fault?
So many questions...

Sparklingbrook · 23/05/2020 10:43

You will have to tell him he can’t come back. You need to decide whether it’s for the duration of the lockdown or forever.

CurlyEndive · 23/05/2020 10:45

Do you mean your ex or his ex?

masonmason · 23/05/2020 10:45

Why has he gone to stay with your ex?

Hingeandbracket · 23/05/2020 10:47

YABU HTH

ukgift2016 · 23/05/2020 10:48

I think you are on the wrong forum...netmum is that way.

WorraLiberty · 23/05/2020 10:52

Aibu to say something?

You mean you didn't say anything at all before he left?

Why? Or did he do a moonlight flit?

meemaw12 · 23/05/2020 10:54

Alongside the YABU and YANBU options there should be a I DON'T CARE option.

pictish · 23/05/2020 10:56

That was nice meemaw.
Feel better for that?

meemaw12 · 23/05/2020 10:59

yes thanks I do 👍

Sparklingbrook · 23/05/2020 11:18

Tie In DON’T CARE option is a button marked HIDE THREAD.

Sparklingbrook · 23/05/2020 11:18

The

Thelnebriati · 23/05/2020 11:20

After a stunt like that, why would you welcome him back at all?

lljkk · 23/05/2020 11:39

um, he needed a change?
You're allowed to dump him if you don't like him. Feeling might be mutual...