Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you know any villages or small towns I could live in as an ethnic minority?

110 replies

amidreaming · 17/05/2020 18:19

I hope my title doesn't offend anyone.

Due to personal circumstances, I really want/need to move. I dream of living in a village, or perhaps a market town, but I don't know where would be ok given I'm an ethnic minority and I'm also a Muslim woman who wears a headscarf. I do get stared at when visiting the countryside, and have been yelled at and even almost attacked once. So, I'm aware there will be some places I can't consider, but would love to find somewhere that would accept me. I dream of buying a home I can escape to, somewhere I can go on country walks, or perhaps somewhere near the coast. I imagine a little cottage somewhere like Grantchester, with a view of the local church from my garden!! I know! I'm asking for a lot! I did see somewhere just like this on rightmove, but it was out of my price range, which is another issue. If I could get somewhere for £150k, that would be perfect, otherwise I could stretch to perhaps £300k with a loan.

I don't need to be near schools, but would like to be within a two/three-hour drive of London, if possible.

Would welcome any suggestions.

OP posts:
Bubblebee7 · 17/05/2020 22:47

I personally wouldn’t want to live in a villiage but as a comprise I would live just outside and with your price range it would be more affordable. Yes or a small town.

inthethickofit19 · 17/05/2020 22:48

Beautiful village type places just on outskirts of Edinburgh if you wanted to avoid hustle bustle. Check out Roslin

TorkTorkBam · 17/05/2020 22:49

Buckinghamshire.

Lots of non-white people move out to the villages in Bucks from north west London. Plus well established communities in places like Wycombe.

Off the top of my head if you wander round Wycombe, Watford, Chesham you'll see other people in hijab.

Welshmaenad · 17/05/2020 22:56

If you're happy to consider Wales, have a look at Caerphilly and the surrounding villages (Rudry/Machen/Bedwas). Caerphilly is lovely, lots of open space and mountains right on your doorstep, busy little town centre/high street and a fuck off big beautiful castle right in the middle of town.

A little over your lower budget could get you this in Rudry for example: West View, Rudry
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-68922684.html

TrainspottingWelsh · 17/05/2020 23:06

I'm further away, but I would say my area is possibly similar to many. It isn't really about ethnicity, more cautious about outsiders. Some people move from towns and cities to supposedly enjoy country life, and cause problems simply because they don't understand country life and seek to change it. Your ethnicity and hijab would simply be viewed as a physical indication you were unlikely to be from a rural background, and it would be that, rather than racism that would make acceptance take longer.

Dp isn't from a rural background and was also viewed with some suspicion initially, despite living with me, and I had to reassure a few about him. Of course, as a white male it was a lot simpler for him to put up with it because he's never been a victim of prejudice before.

That said, nobody cares if someone moves here from any background with a predestined purpose, whether that's as a local gp or running a shop. Because you aren't there only to inflate house prices, rant about cow shit or generally annoy people. But without a reason it just takes a bit longer to prove you are there to fit in, rather than make the area fit in with you. And even so, still friendlier than a big anonymous town or city.

I'd say areas full of second home owners are only more accepting because from a community and economy pov, they're already fucked. Not because they are more welcoming of ethnic minorities than other rural communities.

Original poster
amidreaming · 17/05/2020 23:19

Thanks for all these suggestions!

I definitely hadn't considered Milton Keynes! Didn't know about the villages in/around MK.

Inthethickofit - I do love Edinburgh and it's probably the only city I would consider (despite the distance and, well, it not being a village!), but not sure I could get anything within my budget.

I love Wales too, but always thought it might be difficult living there as an ethnic minority. Perhaps I just need to know which parts of Wales to consider - will look into your suggestions.

Thanks again everyone - you've given me some new places to consider and lots to think about.

OP posts:
ChittyChittyBoomBoom · 17/05/2020 23:30

I’m so sorry that you haven’t been welcomed previously.

Personally, I’d recommend Belper in Derbyshire. It’s a small, vibrant town that actively welcomes diversity.

Your budget would definitely work. There’s a mix of gorgeous character properties and modern houses to suit your budget.

Good luck and i sincerely hope you find somewhere that welcomes you with open arms.

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-75127735.html
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-75850582.html

missymousey · 17/05/2020 23:33

Come to Scotland! Yes Edinburgh is pricey (and it's a city) but there are lovely villages not far away, like the ones around Stirling, where you would easily get something in budget. And no-one would be rude about your hijab.

MooseBreath · 17/05/2020 23:38

Cambridgeshire is great. Easy commute, beautiful scenery and weather, and in my experience, the people have been very kind and welcoming.

choccychipo · 17/05/2020 23:40

I am so sorry this is something you need to enquire about Sad

Welshmaenad · 17/05/2020 23:42

Re: Wales - Cardiff is incredibly ethnically diverse, obviously it's more 'city' than you're looking for though. People make so many negative comments about the Valleys but I moved here 15 years ago from the outskirts of the 'Diff and people are honestly lovely. I love in a tiny Valleys village, my next door neighbours are Sri Lankan and they love it here (they're also the best neighbours I could ask for ❤️).

I would probably avoid the more rural parts of Wales which are far less diverse and not often very tolerant even of other white Welsh people.

Myownname · 17/05/2020 23:49

Have a look at a small market town called Dunmow, I think it’s just what you’re looking for.

FOJN · 17/05/2020 23:49

Devon is beautiful, but it's also where we were called 'darkies'...

I'm white so I accept I am may not be qualified to comment on this but I can only report I live in Devon and have never heard this. That doesn't mean it doesn't happen but it's not a turn of phrase I've heard uttered by anyone. It's not an ethnically diverse county for sure, it's one of the things that struck me when I moved here. It's awful that you're worried you wouldn't be welcome as it is a beautiful place to live and offers so much of what you're looking for.
I agree with a PP, it is heartbreaking that you feel the need to ask and I'm sorry that's the case.
Good luck finding a place.

zeddybrek · 17/05/2020 23:50

Hi OP

I am an ethnic minority. I moved from London to a nice, green leafy village in the home counties for a bigger house, garden etc etc. After 4 years came running back. It was such a mistake and we were fed up of feeling out of place.

My biggest advice is to rent somewhere you think you want to buy. It's an easier mistake to fix trust me.

Also this really isn't the forum to ask as you will get people thinking they live somewhere welcoming but isn't because they don't see the underlying racism and unconscious bias that goes on. I don't mean that as an attack, I mean you won't experience racism in a majority white town of you are white so you might not notice the problem.

Good luck OP.

MrsSchadenfreude · 17/05/2020 23:56

I wouldn’t go to Wolverton, but agree with others that MK or one of the small towns or villages nearby might fit the bill. Stony Stratford, Newport Pagnell, New Bradwell all small towns with their own character. I would look at villages north of MK - Hanslope, Castlethorpe, Cosgrove, Potterspury and Paulerspury. Towcester or Buckingham as well.

Bubblebee7 · 18/05/2020 00:09

@zeddybrek I agree. Good point about renting first.

salagadoo · 18/05/2020 00:26

Hi I'm also a Muslim and wear hijab and originally from London. I would say some areas in Hampshire would work... Not all.. Winchester would be perfect. It's more market town but so many villages just outside and really commutable to London. I go there a lot and would happily move there. It's relatively diverse and the people don't look at you like you're unwelcome. The only thing is it can be expensive so you would need to go more on the outskirts which is what you want anyway.

As for the person referencing Devon the they've never heard anything racist there... Well obviously you wouldn't have it at you as you're white. A close friend grew up in Devon... Half English and looks white but because she is Muslim (did not wear a headscarf) but was the most ethnic person at school and was bullied mercilessly.

Another reason non white people don't want to leave cities is we don't want our kids being the outsiders at school.

GrumpyHoonMain · 18/05/2020 00:30

Milton Keynes isn’t really rural it’s a garden city. It’s where Indian / Pakistani / Bangladeshi Londoners go ‘to be rural’ and unless you’re local it’s really difficult to build decent social networks.

IchWill · 18/05/2020 00:53

@GrumpyHoonMain

Nobody has said MK is rural. The OP asked for villages and market town recommendations. MK has plenty of both. And as these areas predate MK being founded the communities within them are much better established.

I tend to find there's zero community in our newer estates.

I also disagree that it's difficult to build networks. There's so much to do and see, lots of groups available up join etc. :)

JingsMahBucket · 18/05/2020 00:56

@inthethickofit19 I was also going to mention Edinburgh. There are good transportation links too.

Itisbetter · 18/05/2020 00:59

For us a devon is fine, Oxfordshire not so great.

CatAndHisKit · 18/05/2020 01:44

MooseBreath isn't Cambs very expensive? can you give examples of towns with low prices, please? Personally I@d be interested in any place with a train station linking to London.

Original poster
amidreaming · 18/05/2020 02:02

@FOJN
I don't doubt that it's not a common turn of phrase in Devon, but for this person it was. He said, 'Hello Darkies'. Would you believe that I was once told by a lady from a small town in the countryside that if I were to move there, there'd be people who'd drive me out. Most people would be shocked that anyone could say something like that, but say that she did.

As zeddybrek pointed out, it probably is hard for people who aren't from an ethnic minority to comprehend some of what we might have to endure. Sometimes, it's overt, other times it's subtle. I remember being a little lost somewhere once and asking a man for directions - he heard me, but turned around and went back into his shop. I've had so many experiences like that and some quite scary ones, too. I'm not saying this is an everyday occurence, but it happens enough to feel that I don't belong in some places, or that I am 'different'.

OP posts:
Helpfulrabbit · 18/05/2020 02:04

I used to live in a beautiful village outside Lincoln but when I met my husband who is Pakistani and converted to Islam the people’s perception of me drastically changed.

We now live in Sheffield with his parents and it’s much better. The Pakistani community is so welcoming and friendly and they don’t treat me with any contempt like the people in my old village treated me and my husband. I know it’s the city but my suggestion would be to find somewhere with a strong Islamic community. Not only will you be safe in numbers but other Muslims will be able to help keep you devout.

I wish you so much luck and I am always available for chat if you need.