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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbours, cats and birds.

340 replies

Birdmurderer · 17/05/2020 09:02

NC for this but regular.

We've lived in out house for a year, on a "hello" basis with next door. She's got a voice you can hear 3 streets away and her eldest daughter seems to have inherited it. A few issues but generally ok neighbours.

We have 3 cats - one who is old and never leaves the decking area of our garden, one who seems to have another family a few doors down (other side to neighbour in question), and one who likes to peep through their chain link fence at them but is too much of a mamas boy to leave our garden. (we've had a lot of time during lockdown to confirm our theories about where they go during the day). They made it clear from day one they don't like cats and will talk loudly about how awful our cats are when they know we're within earshot .

DP just went outside to get his bike and the woman is sobbing in the garden. Spots DP and starts shouting at him because apparently one of ours cats has eaten a bird that she was looking after (she has a feeding table in her garden).

DP apologised - for what I'm not sure - and sort of left it there and went off about his day. I was still in bed when all this happened.

He's gone out now and I can hear her sobbing and shouting in the garden about this bird.

There are 2 big cats the other side of her, one of which is horrible and has put my little cat in the vets twice. I think that's the culprit over my fat old one who sleeps 23 hours a day, the deserter, and the little one who can't catch his own tail.

AIBU to think she's massively overreacted? I have quite bad social anxiety and I am not good with confrontation so I'm hiding indoors now.

OP posts:
Gimmecaffeine · 17/05/2020 15:07

There is no evidence cat predation has any impact on bird populations. They tend to take sick or weak birds that woukd be unlikely to be able to breed.

www.rspb.org.uk/birds-and-wildlife/advice/gardening-for-wildlife/animal-deterrents/cats-and-garden-birds/are-cats-causing-bird-declines/

They still kill birds, which is unpleasant, but nature is unpleasant. Every wild creature is doomed to either be eaten or starve to death. Personally I'd rather be murdered by a cat than slowly starve.

The life experience and suffering of a cat isn't insignificant. Some go a bit mad with frustration when kept inside.

ChardonnaysPetDragon · 17/05/2020 15:09

The life experience and suffering of a cat isn't insignificant. Some go a bit mad with frustration when kept inside.

The life experience and the suffering of the birds that they kill is probably even more significant. Mad with frustration is not as bad as dead.

understandmenow · 17/05/2020 15:12

The life experience and the suffering of the birds that they kill is probably even more significant. Mad with frustration is not as bad as dead.

Says who?

Gimmecaffeine · 17/05/2020 15:14

The life experience and the suffering of the birds that they kill is probably even more significant. Mad with frustration is not as bad as dead.

Read my post. The evidence is they kill sick or weak birds. They are likely to die horribly anyway.

Gimmecaffeine · 17/05/2020 15:16

Oh, and I hope the cat haters here aren't meat eaters Grin

CarolefeckinBaskin · 17/05/2020 15:19

Your neighbour is being a little OTT. She can't be sure it was one of your cats so shouldn't be aiming her sobs at you.

What's with this 'circle of life' that many are saying.
It's not! Pet cats aren't participating in any circle of life activity when they've got a constant supply of whiskers biscuits indoors! They kill for fun not food and because they want to not because they have to.
Agree with put bells on their collar.

To the poster who wrote this..
And if you don't like cats in the garden you can take steps to.put them off. Mine have worked well enough
Why should we (says she that has just spent the best part of 50 quid on stuff to keep the furry little fuckers out of my garden)
If people want cats as pets and to go outside then they should be responsible and cat proof THEIR OWN gardens to deter the little shits going in other peoples.

TinySleepThief · 17/05/2020 15:19

The life experience and the suffering of the birds that they kill is probably even more significant.

How on earth can you possibly quantify that? It kind of feels like no matter what argument people put across you would come up with a reason to make cats the villains.

I'm sure your life would be better without cats in it so that they didn't shit in your garden or squash your flowers but I hope in your ideal utopia you like rats and mice.

sophiasnail · 17/05/2020 15:22

How would all the people who think it is fine for cats to go into other people's gardens and kill the birds feel about dogs killing cats?

LST · 17/05/2020 15:24

@Sophiasnail if my cat was stupid enough to get killed by a dog I would not blame the dog or owner (unless of course they aided it) unpleasant as it may be, dogs too are predatory and kill smaller mammals. I have a dog. He wouldn't kill a cat but my mums terrier would given half the chance.

ChardonnaysPetDragon · 17/05/2020 15:27

Because the bird will be dead, and the cat will still be alive? Hmm

TSSDNCOP · 17/05/2020 16:24

How would all the people who think it is fine for cats to go into other people's gardens and kill the birds feel about dogs killing cats?

Well, to be honest I think the chances would be vanishingly small. Unless the exit was over 7 feet (eg fence/wall) I would bet my cats against a dog for speed. Maybe a terrier with a head start but even then I'd bet on the cats escape.

I watch my cats scale that easily at their leisure, let alone with a dog n their heels.

They would almost certainly drop whatever they were carrying. Would the dog then eat it Confused

SweetMarmalade · 17/05/2020 16:36

I hope those with cats bringing home birds that haven’t been killed, rather just played with, mauled and injured, take steps to be responsible and if needs be take the injured bird etc to a rescue where it can be treated?

I do have another neighbour who told me once she just ‘lobs’ injured birds brought home by Tiddles into the fucking front hedge! Nice one!

frillyfucks · 17/05/2020 16:47

I take real issue with people who think it's ok to buy a cat and then just release it on the neighbourhood and the local wildlife population- it's just moronic.

Here is a useful link - read it an educate yourself you stupid person

theconversation.com/one-cat-one-year-110-native-animals-lock-up-your-pet-its-a-killing-machine-138412

Gimmecaffeine · 17/05/2020 16:49

Because the bird will be dead, and the cat will still be alive?

For the third time, the evidence is that cats largely kill sick/weak birds that are unlikely to survive until the next breeding season. The fate of these birds otherwise is to slowly starve to death.

From the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds:

It is likely that most of the birds killed by cats would have died anyway from other causes before the next breeding season, so cats are unlikely to have a major impact on populations. If their predation was additional to these other causes of mortality, this might have a serious impact on bird populations.

www.rspb.org.uk/birds-and-wildlife/advice/gardening-for-wildlife/animal-deterrents/cats-and-garden-birds/are-cats-causing-bird-declines/

Gimmecaffeine · 17/05/2020 16:51

How would all the people who think it is fine for cats to go into other people's gardens and kill the birds feel about dogs killing cats?

I'd be sad, but providing the dog owner didn't encourage the dog to kill cats it would just be one of those things.

5foot5 · 17/05/2020 16:55

Unless she actually saw the cat attack the Bird then my money would be on the magpies. They really are murdering bastards. We saw one kill a thrush right out side our patio doors just as we were sitting down to Sunday dinner

gumball37 · 17/05/2020 16:58

I feel like letting cats roam is a UK thing? There are strays around me for sure... But I've had cats for 18ish years and they're never outside.

As an aside... I once had a rat problem at a house I moved into.... My "murderous thugs" didn't do a damned thing to help. I had to kill all the rats with traps😡

mommymooo · 17/05/2020 17:04

@ChardonnaysPetDragon
People who like cats are strange??

Can I ask do you own any pets yourself? Just curious

LST · 17/05/2020 17:09

@frillyfucks..I didn't buy my cats sooooo 👍🏻You silly person

SweetMarmalade · 17/05/2020 17:10

@Gimmecaffeine but fledgling birds such as blackbirds, who don’t initially fly when they leave the nest, aren’t necessarily weak or diseased, they’re just at a disadvantage because they count on ground cover to hop around under whilst being fed by their parents. They don’t stand a chance against a cat! That’s why I think cats are arseholes!

I wouldn’t stand in my garden wailing but I’d be pretty pissed off! I’ve had a lovely time feeding the birds and their young during lockdown, if Tiddles comes near my garden he’ll get a soaking!

understandmenow · 17/05/2020 17:16

@mommymooo yes @ChardonnaysPetDragon owns dogs and they're not just any dogs they're big dogs! I think that gives them extra kudos!

GrinGrinGrin

But obviously having big dogs doesn't mean she's strange......

SweetMarmalade · 17/05/2020 17:17

@5foot5 yes Maggies are murdering bastards as are cats. I’ve had to fend off no end of Mapgies and rescue a couple of fledglings who were out of their nest far too early! They must have abandoned it as Maggie arsehole was continuing to mither the nest area and worry the parents.

Luckily I got to the fledglings before Tiddles.

SweetMarmalade · 17/05/2020 17:18

Mapgies Grin

seltaeb · 17/05/2020 17:21

Three cats is too many. No-one needs that number of pets, if you only had one it would seem more reasonable.

Oliversmumsarmy · 17/05/2020 17:23

I’ve got 5