I need some help to a problem that just doesn’t seem to go away. My sons father and I split up 5 years ago. My son spends 2 nights one week and 4 nights another. Mon and Tuesday one week and Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday another with his dad and he pays £169 a month child maintenance. He has always hated paying it and keeps asking for 50/50 shared care. This means that I will not get any maintenance payments through CM. I told him I would be happy to do this if he agrees to pay half towards childcare costs, school trips and school uniform. He won’t agree to this but even if he does I don’t trust him because he agrees to things and then when he gets fed up or if it isn’t working out with his life he just tells me he won’t do it ( whatever it is) anymore. I was offered a new job the week lockdown was announced. He is currently working from home. I explained my situation with him and he agreed to look after my son while I could do two days at my new job. It wasn’t full time but it was better than nothing. After two weeks of this, he called and said it was too much for him to deal with and that he couldn’t look after him anymore while he worked from home and that he wouldn’t be able to see him as much during lockdown doe to him not being at school and being at home with him all day while he had work to do. I subsequently lost my new job so now I am living off benefits. He wouldnt tell me the new arrangement to see him. I can only imagine this is so I couldn’t contact child maintenance to tell them the new nights which would mean the payments going up. He has contacted me this morning to tell me he will not be paying me any child maintenance until he gets 50/50 shared care and if I stop my son from seeing him Because of this, I am a despicable mother. I just feel constantly bullied and controlled by him. I am happy to accept 50/50 shared care if he contributes towards childcare and such. I’ve said we need a court order because I can’t live my life like this. At the moment I don’t have a job and don’t know when I’ll get one but once I do I don’t think it’s fair to pay all the costs on my own. My question is, if I go and see a solicitor who my parents are offering to pay for because they are as sick of this as I am, can I agree a court order where he has 50/50 shared care and pays half towards childcare, school trips and school uniform because I will struggle financially if he doesn’t and it doesn’t seem fair if he doesn’t have to.