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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think horrible neighbours are getting worse

28 replies

ColdcoffeeHotface · 15/05/2020 20:26

Today our next door neighbour ranted at me for twenty minutes because I let my three year old play in the garden without any trousers or pants on. We have a six foot fence, you would have to be upstairs and looking out the window to see into a small part of our garden.
He really went to town calling me everything under the sun, from a pedophile to an alcoholic, told me I was an 'adopted spoilt bitch.' A friend of mine's dad was also told by a neighbour 'I hope you die from coronavirus!' Also a friends mum was called a 'stupid Jewish bitch' by a neighbour the other week. What is going on? Who talks to people like that?
We also live in apparently 'the happiest city in the U.K.'

OP posts:

OldCow1 · 15/05/2020 20:47

Wow! Nasty! I guess people are acting out if you've lived there for some time with no problems. Hopefully things will settle down when restrictions ease a bit.

trellishead · 15/05/2020 22:08

Society has got worse year on year, ever since the very idea of society was scoffed at by Thatcher. There is a very good book called "No Such Thing as Society", named after her famous, contemptuous quote. Tories need us all to squabble between ourselves for obvious reasons. It keeps people down.

Original poster

ColdcoffeeHotface · 15/05/2020 22:10

I think it's the impact of being able to say what you like online, people forget and just say stuff to anyone in real life.

OP posts:

ohlookthisisjustdaftnow · 15/05/2020 22:15

You stood there for 20 minutes? I'd have walked off after 20 seconds.

Original poster

ColdcoffeeHotface · 15/05/2020 22:27

@ohlookthisisjustdaftnow my children were playing and he was shouting out of his window as we were sat in the garden. To be honest I didn't see why we should retreat. I did in the end.

OP posts:

Rhodri · 15/05/2020 22:33

I wouldn’t speak to you about it but I would totally judge you and talk about you behind your back. It’s beyond me why anyone would let their child wander around outside without appropriate clothing for warmth and protection, especially when it’s only May. And I do think it’s inappropriate for your child to be naked from the waist down when outdoors.

JanewaysBun · 15/05/2020 22:44

Isn't that used as a potty training technique?
My garden is communal so I shall not do this though...

Samtsirch · 15/05/2020 22:45

How would he know you were adopted?
How would he know you are spoilt?
Agree with @Rhodri.
Does he have mental health issues?
Something was clearly a trigger for your unpleasant neighbour.

Samtsirch · 15/05/2020 22:49

@trellishead
Glad I’m not the only one who sometimes pops up on the wrong thread
😆
I feel your shame “ sista” 🤣😂🤣

ohlookthisisjustdaftnow · 15/05/2020 22:56

I wouldn't have let my children listen to someone shouting obscenities ot ouf the window, I would have taken them inside.

madcatladyforever · 15/05/2020 23:10

This is why I don't live in cities, I have never had these problems in the country.

DamnYankee · 15/05/2020 23:18

I'd have wanted to know why he was staring at my little DC.
And, yes, it's an effective potty-training technique for boys.
And it was OP's own garden! With a six-foot fence, no less!

Also, OP, I wouldn't judge you nor talk behind your back...and anyone (PP) who would is not only "beyond me," but is also totally "inappropriate," and therefore, deserving of an "appropriate" brushing off.

That aside, can you appeal to someone? We have homeowner's associations here (for better, for worse)...

Coffeecak3 · 16/05/2020 11:21

@rhodri why is it inappropriate in a private garden for a 3 year old not to be fully clothed?

slipperywhensparticus · 16/05/2020 11:25

My son is permanently naked its my fucking garden you dont like it dont fuking look in it

CHIRIBAYA · 16/05/2020 11:31

There are nasty people about, were before lockdown and wil be afterwards. Why should your three year old not play outside naked in your own garden? Some people on here seem to have an issue with nudity as if the naked body of a child is something dirty or shameful. If you are incapable of approaching someone to talk openly but instead go behind someone's back to gossip and judge you are essentially lacking in basic communication skills and I pity you.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 16/05/2020 11:36

I wouldn’t speak to you about it but I would totally judge you and talk about you behind your back. It’s beyond me why anyone would let their child wander around outside

That says more about you then the OP, and the child isn’t wondering around outside, they are in their own private residence while the neighbour overlooks into their back garden being incredibly abusive!

Sodamncold · 16/05/2020 11:37

You stood there for 20 mins whilst he ranted?

Sodamncold · 16/05/2020 11:43

You should jab recorder him hanging out his window shouting this abuse

I would have brought my children back inside though so they didn’t need to hear it

And now knowing that he has sight of my garden and is abusive, I would not have the children naked out there until the police had dealt with him

Sodamncold · 16/05/2020 11:45

As for @Rhodri who said she would judge the OP

This is what Rhod posted on a thread a few days ago and I think it says it all really

* Nothing has changed much for me. I’ve been alone all my life because nobody wanted to be my friend. Now everyone is getting a taste of what it’s like to be alone. Schadenfreude and all that.*

Isawamagpie · 16/05/2020 11:50

I DS is 6 and he did this a couple of weeks ago with paddling pool out?
I had prehaps, 2 seconds where I thought- it this still appropriate? Before deciding yes - if you can't Do this at 6 years old, in the privacy of your own garden - when are you going to be able to do it, certainly at no point his his life will he be able to do it again!
We have 6ft fences both sides and i wouldnt put up with my neighbours shouting at me.
YANBU op! You neighbour certainly is!

NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite · 16/05/2020 11:53

I think it sounds as if your ndn has problems. I like the way @Samtsirch
stated:
"How would he know you were adopted?"
"How would he know you are spoilt?"

.… as if he'd know about whether you were a paedophile or an alcoholic. 😂 😂 😂

Some people have always been nasty. I doubt the pandemic has changed them but now they have more opportunity to be nosey neighbours.

Tappering · 16/05/2020 12:09

This is utterly hilarious! The child is 3 years old. It's quite normal for them to wander about half clothed - especially if potty training is happening. OP has a 6' fence - if you want to judge then you'd have to go upstairs to look out of the window, or stand on a ladder to do so; both of which are totally inappropriate.

And it's mid-May, if you want to be precise. And as for 'warmth and protection' - there have been very sunny and hot days. So I don't think you need to be quite so melodramatic. She's not sending her toddler yomping half naked across the Brecons in November.

starfishmummy · 16/05/2020 12:22

It was a nice day here yesterday. I probably wouldn't have sent my son out like that (if he was still a toddler) but only because it was the sort of may day where several years ago I got badly sunburned (not realising how strong the sun was) and I'd worry about his bits!!

Knowivedonewrong · 16/05/2020 12:23

Knobber of the day goes to Rhodri.

Samtsirch · 16/05/2020 17:18

@NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite
🤣 Sorry, didn't mean it like that 😂

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