to introduce my son to man I'm seeing this early?

[ShambalaHambala]

I've been seeing someone who I like, a lot. I came out of an abusive relationship with my ex when my son was born. Son is 19 months old. Was seeing new guy for around 3 months before lock down. Haven't seen him in 2 months. He messaged me last night asking if I wanted to go for a walk with him round our local park. I said I would love to, but as a lone parent who lives alone, I would have to take my son with me. He would either be in the sling or the pram. Do you think this would be OK? Or is it way too soon? I'd love to see him but feel like it's a big step taking my son with me. Wwyd?

Go for it, your son isn't even going to really notice. Its not like you're moving the man in! Like this world isn't tough enough right now! Give yourself a break and go have a walk with your friend and have a lovely time!

I carried children in a rose & rebellion sling until he was nearly 4

I would.
He's 19 months old and it's a walk in a park.
It's not like you're bringing the bloke home and introducing him as "your new daddy'.

I'm
Nearly exactly same situ as u except I've known him for 10 years he's come to my garden a few times and sat away from me when dd was in bed but my 5 year old decided to poke her head out a few times and she's thought nothin of it than it's just mummy's friend, so 100% still go for it, life still has to carry on x

Sounds fine to me Op.

I wouldn't.standard advice on here is that you should know someone properly and for at least six months before you introduce them to your children. Once this is done you can't un- introduce them and it takes the relationship in faster. How long would you have waited before the introduction of lockdown hadn't happened?Where did you meet him and how much do you actually know about him if you've only been on a handful of dates?

I am over cautious btw.

I would. Its not like your 19 month old had a clue what a boyfriend is. As long as you wont be snogging and it's just a walk round the park I don't see the harm.

@OnlyJudyCanJudgeMe.
Why do you say far too early considering a 19 month old is way to young to form memories or attachments to people they have just met. I'm curious why you think it's too young?!

OP i say go for it. If it improves your health of mind its only a good thing!

Definitely go for it OP. MN has this weird idea that any child introduced to a boyfriend before the magical 6 month target is akin to child d abuse .

I feel quite differently. I think that potential partners need to be checked out for appropriate child interaction fairly early on.

There is a BIG difference between great partner when all you have to focus on is him... finding out that he is an actual adult male who can cope with understanding that your focus has to be on your child when he is around is a biggie.. a man who has a tantrum when you need to have your head in meal planning and entertaining your child - is someone you don't need to waste your time on... and better to know that sooner than later.

Being a 'couple' when you have kids is not your 'real life' .. good to find out how he reacts now rather than later ..

@ShambalaHambala I’ve literally never ever seen a toddler in a sling.

Sounds fine. Its not like your telling your son that this is his new Daddy and moving him in, itsjusy a walk in a park with a friend really.
And what's with all the 19 month old in a sling shock? My eldest wasnt walking until she was nearly 18 months old, loads of kids dont walk everywhere at that age, it's not that unusual surely?

I'm the wrong person to ask, as I'm judgey and prudish with these things. However that is my issue and not yours.
This isn't about your son having no awareness of what's going on. It's about jumping into a new relationship too soon, and allowing your son to be part of that, even if it is just for a walk. I'm a single mum who would love to meet the right person. But I can't even imagine being in that headspace when my children were babies.

Different strokes for different folks.

Hi, out of interest does the "one person each household" rule for public places have an age limit on it? I told my father he wouldn't be able to see his granddaughter because that would have to be with one of her parents = more than one household member meeting him so not allowed for now. Would love to tell him I was wrong!

On mumsnet, introducing a man to your children before you've known him a decade is tantamount to child abuse. In fact it's preferable you never date again.

At that age he won't even know, and the new relationship aspect is also irrelevant because you are meeting him for a walk, not moving him in.
I'm probably not the best person to ask, because dp and I met and got to know each other's dc when we were still only platonic friends with no plans for any other type of relationship, so we committed the mumsnet parenting fail of introductions before we even had the first date. It's apparently best if you hold off on any relationship till your ds is an adult.