Dreading going back in the office - what do I do??

[DreadingItBadly]

Working from home currently, obviously grateful to be healthy, employed and fully paid. Received a message from our CEO about them working out a gradual return to work scheme and now feel so down.

Not being in the office for the past 7 weeks has greatly helped my mental health. I have a diagnosed depression and been on antidepressants for 4 years. Tried quitting twice, with a couple of weeks going well and then a relapse, horrible feelings, crying for no reason and back on AD. Stopped taking them again in the end of March - and have had no need for them since. In fact, feeling so happy and at peace. I have been in this job for 10 years, have great relationships with everyone. However, there were a couple of very stressful events and altercations in that time which have stayed with me, I guess.

I don't know what I am asking. I could afford to leave my job but my daughter is in a private school (year 8) and my salary pays for it. Not to mention pension, etc. In the past I asked my line manager to let me work from home at least a day a week and it has always been a flat "no" because she doesn't want to set a precedent.

Any advice of how I can make my case? Or what can I do to feel differently? Thanks in advance.

Bump...

Perhaps post this in employment rather than AIBU and then you will get clearer advice.
Do work know about your depression? Genuinely, do you feel your performance has been affected by you being at home? Would your colleagues workload be affected by you being at home in the longer term. If you were to work from home, would there be an element of flexibility (sometimes, if diaries have been difficult to manage or it's an important visitor, I just go in on the day I'm wfh, and, in rare occasions, on my day off too)? Is there an HR person/team where you work?

I think that your work has to make reasonable adjustments for your depression and you could argue that would be a reasonably adjustment. In some circumstances, they can say no. Whether they are able to, would depend on the impact it has on your ability to do your role.

Thanks for your post.
My colleagues know but my manager doesn't. To be fair, everybody in my office is on some kind of AD, for various reasons (and they are not asking to work from home). So I am not sure my case will be valid on that ground.
My being at home will not affect the others' work, we all have our own responsibilities. For my manager it is more of a matter of principle.

I think you could legitimately ask to WFH as a reasonable adjustment. And if your job can be done from home they shouldn’t have you going in anyway.

It doesn’t matter what everyone else is doing - if it helps YOU that’s the key.

I just received a message from my immediate department saying that they are planning to get people back in the next couple of weeks. Not sure where they got 2 weeks from if for now it should still be working from home.

But didn't the government say you should only go to work if you CAN'T work from home. You CAN work from home so that's what you should continue to do.

Work out what you are asking for. Do you want to WFH all the time? Or would 4 days WFH and one at the office work for you, or whatever pattern you want. Is it about a shift in working location, hours or a combination or other notable things that are making you feel better during this period? Prepare a few bullet points on what you'd like the arrangement to be, outline that you've seen real benefits to your mental health and productivity during this period (if possible show some examples that have benefitted the company), and go and ask for the adjustments with your head high and a smile on your face. Don't ask, don't get!

I think the precedent has already been set OP, we're living in it. You are proof that you can do you job wfh and in fact Boris had said quite clearly that if you can WFH you should. Going back to the office should be the exception not the rule.

www.gov.uk/guidance/working-safely-during-coronavirus-covid-19/offices-and-contact-centres

Download the guidance.

Go to 1.1 and 1.2.

They should be continuing WFH "as a first option".

And they have to certify they've enabled people to do that.

They also have to share their risk assessments with you.

I would push back against this. As pp have said you are wfh in line with government guidance.

Work out what you want to ask for, maybe put it up here as some are good at this stuff on here.

Could you speak to you GP? I'm not sure if they can provide a letter of support for you to wfh. Are you married? You mention your salary pays for school? I've given up my work for the foreseeable. Much happier being poorer but less stressed.

Have you spoken to your colleagues? If there is little reduction to productivity there isn't much reason to rush back

OP your original post said you received a message from the CEO about a gradual return to the office but your subsequent post says 'your department' is talking about people returning in 2 week.

Are you sure your department is not jumping the gun here? My firm has told everyone to continue WFH but has been transparent that plans to help people to return to the office are being developed when the time comes that we can return. The CEO message sounds similar but your department one sets out a different message and timescale. I think you need to ask for clarification on that firstly.

Also its likely that any return to the office will be very gradual possibly 1 or 2 days a week. Why don't you see how that works and feels and then have the conversation with your manager about continuing on that pattern. I wouldn't get yourself upset yet, we have a long way to go before returning to any kind of normality.

Thanks for the suggestion to put up points here, will do that!

I am married, yes. The work itself is not stressful, it's the people. A lot happened in this workplace, some of it hit me hard, and I still see these people regularly. I had been coping before the lockdown but not having to deal with it mentally for 2 months has shown me just how much happier I can be. I was physically exhausted and mentally wrecked before.

BerryCatHolly that's correct, my department operates a bit separately and generally sets its own rules. Most of people can't wait to get back because they are bored at home.

If you can cope financially & were physically & mentally exhausted before, it's a no brainier for me. I realise that giving up your job is a massive decision though. I don't like not bringing any money into the home & hope to work again at some stage

The easiest argument you can make is that you are more productive WFH, is that is true then I would make it. Also any other pluses like if you have offices in over timezones and could adjust your hours to overlap better, or if you can be more flexible. Try and spin it like your doing them a favor

It’s not necessarily the best argument though if there is evidence it’s less productive. One assumes companies check this out. However lots quite like the idea of working from home and have a policy staff have to adhere to. Saves on office space too!

Well you have proved that wfh can work, so I dont see why you can’t use that as an argument to carry on for day a couple of days a week? Use mental health, cost saving to the business, help with ensuring social distancing happens etc as arguments as well

Having proved you can do your job from home for a number of weeks it will be harder for your employer to refuse a reasonable request to work from home at least one or two days a week. Additionally as your request is on health grounds and is potentially a reasonable adjustment it will make it even harder for them to say no.

I would suggest you make a request as a reasonable adjustment but also set out what work you have been doing from home and how you have still delivered the requirements of your role. Think about which days would suit you e.g. Tuesday and Thursday work from home. In my experience people often take odd days leave on Mondays and Friday's so offering to be in the office those days can show you are also thinking of the business. Also offer to be flexible about which days you would be in the office.