Haven't brushed my son's teeth in a week and am struggling!

[ShambalaHambala]

AIBU to literally hold him down and force him to brush his teeth? He is 18 months old, doesn't eat much sugar but still has fruit and the occasional treat. Regardless, I needs to brush his teeth. It's been a week since I've brushed then properly and haven't been able to because he screams and clamps down on the toothbrush. I've tried getting him to brush his own teeth whilst I do mine then brush his properly after, different toothpastes in case it was the taste, different toothbrushes. This aversion to teeth brushing has been on and off since he was about 1. Can anyone advise?

It will pass. Just keep persisting and ask to e a dinosaur and sneak the toothbrush in x

Another one who regularly sits on her children to brush their teeth. They think it’s funny now

I let DS - 17 months, 'brush' mine and then I brush his and then he brushes his, we also sing a made up song that involves lots of aaahs. DH tried the 'you will do this' and using a towel as MIL advised, but it just results in melt down and non effective brushing.
DS is pretty ineffective brushing on his own but I guess it's a good habit, so I let him have a go after I've done them properly. We also got him a new toothbrush from Lidl (it's the most garish awful one you'll ever see) because he threw the last one in the toilet, and he loves the bloody thing

If he clamps on the toothbrush, you need two. One with a fat, slightly squashy handle is good, let him clamp on that and you've got space to get the narrower head in and brush. It passes when they get used to it. Definitely preferable to dental treatment!

We did “brush brush brush your teeth brush your teeth all clean scrubity scrubity scrubity scrubity now your teeth all gleam” etc for two of ours, one hates all songs & we had to clean the homes of the weevils who lived in his teeth they had names & we had to describe the decor!
Ooh is that tooth red!? Etc works & my eldest was queen of the youngest’s tooth brushing by asking her to be a fierce tiger showing its teeth then a hippo opening its mouth wide etc etc.

Gosh toddlers are exhausting but fun

Oh my, I really feel your pain, had this exact issue only last week with my 3yo DD. I came on here for advice and pretty much everyone told me to pin her down and just do it, but even that didn't work. For the record, children can scream and bite on a toothbrush at the same time! It was literally impossible to pin her down and get in there with a toothbrush and very distressing for us all. By all means try this as it is really important to clean their teeth, I get that, but it didn't work for us.

In the end I rang the dentist for advice and they were very reassuring. Said to relax about it, as long as somehow we were getting fluoride into her mouth twice a day to count that as a win. Avoid giving them anything sugary to eat. Fruit is fine, cheese is good for the teeth aparently. They said not to make it a battle and just relax about it, make it as positive experience and give lots of praise.

I know your DC is a lot younger so this might not be possible but what worked for us in the end was letting her clean her own teeth. I have my toothbrush and face her acting like a mirror, showing her which teeth to brush and she copies me and I give her lots of praise. A week later and she has started to let me guide her toothbrush a bit, while she's holding it so she still feels like she's in control, and I just throw the praise at her. Now she loves cleaning her teeth, literally a week later!

So there is hope, this too shall pass. Good luck and stay strong!

I went through a phase of having to pin both of mine down. You don't have to do it for long before they get it. They soon realise its happening and that's that.

Watch some cheesey cheerful toothbrushing rhymes, it helps DS potty train. Get him to do teddies teeth, I use to pass it to mine in the bath let them chew and suck on it while it was mixed with bath suds.
I think if you hold him down you'll feed his anxiety.

You need two toothbrushes. One for him to clap on. Then you brush as much as you can with the other. He’ll be confused, realise you’re still brushing somehow and let go of the clamped one. Use each release to brush the teeth you couldn’t get to.

Also- let him brush your teeth while you do his. Make it fun.

Maybe a star/ sticker chart?

My dd used to scream but I went in anyway. Just had to dart the brush in every-time she opened to bellow - she's fine now though and almost never complains

If he's a Hey duggee fan there's a toothbrushing badge and song, maybe take your mobile into the bathroom and watch and brush at the same time?

Another who pinned DS down to scrub teeth! Teeth cleaning is a job negotiable - I haven’t got many!

*non negotiable

I shove a screen of their favourite youtube rubbish in their face and whenever they clamp down etc I turn it to face me and pretend I'm watching it, the missing out drives them crazy. Failing that I hold them down and say the more you scream, the easier it is for me to see your teeth, thank you

We had to use the towel method eventually but 2 days of it and dc1 was desperate to open his mouth for us and get a big boy sticker.

You've got to brush his teeth.

We have a chewy silicone one and strawberry toothpaste.

Oh god this reminds me wrapping toddler first DC blanket and holding hi between knees to get his teeth brushed. Fun times.

I used to get DS to do his himself in the bath. Bit yuk but he eventually got used to it and stopped making a fuss. I know he still brushes his teeth in the shower and he's 15. Strange boy.

I let my 16mo brush his own teeth in the morning with the Hey Duggee song, but it's non negotiable in the evening. He tries to run away, and he is fast, but I am faster. I pin him down with his head in my crotch and my legs over each arm. Both my hands are free to get to work.

If I'm alone, he shouts and it's a good opportunity to get in there. If my husband is about, we will tickle him and the laughter also allows good access.

When he's upset or hurt, he has tears running down his face. There are never any tears during the tooth torture. He's simply loud and red. He's just absolutely livid with me, and that's ok.

Maybe it's not what everyone would do, but as a primary school teacher, I've seen 6 year olds with painful abscesses and needing extractions. On balance, it's the right choice for us.

In case it helps, I let my girls watch a tooth brushing song on YouTube (like the one on mother goose club) while they brush. It's good incentive and also times the two minutes for them.

I so wish I had done this with my 2 . I tried to encourage, threat etc. Etc but in the end I failed and ended up with holding them down for a ga. I regret it to this day.

With a reluctant brushee, I often pretend to clean bits of whatever they have eaten that day off their teeth, so ‘Oh no, I can see a bit of broccoli on this tooth. What’s this? Strawberry’ etc. Utterly asinine, but Dc still enjoys it at 6.

I second what the first pp said - oranurse is extremely good for those who can’t stand the flavour or foaminess of toothpaste.