Can anyone explain this relationship feeling please?

[higgypiggy]

When you imagine leaving, having a happier life without him yet the thought of him with someone else makes you feel sick??

When you imagine having a huge weight lifted off your shoulders if you left yet you are too scared to go through with it.

My mind is out of control at the moment

It means you’re with the wrong person and need to leave for the benefit of your mental health and well-being... but you’re scared of change As you know it will get worse before it gets better.....?

Naturally there’s loads of variables to my interpretation!!

Did you get together when you were young? Is it the fear of the unknown, or is the only thing keeping you there genuinely the thought of him with someone else?

@Justmuddlingalong I can't figure anything out in my head at the moment as it feels so messed up but it's probably the thought of him with someone else which is just ridiculous but I can't control feeling like that

I can relate to that feeling. But then we broke up, I could see it was the best thing for me mentally. It did still hurt at the time and like you the idea of him with someone else made me feel sick for a while.

Then time passed and even though a year later I would hate to bump in to him and might find it hard to see him with someone else my mental health is soooo much better, I feel free and I am a lot happier out of a toxic relationship.

People are perfectly capable of not loving someone but hate the idea of someone else with them. Maybe it’s a sense of ownership or the feeling that they would have a better relationship that you did.
Either way it’s a separate feeling to the one that makes you want to stay or leave a relationship.
It’s also the one you mustn’t let lead your decisions.

Sounds pretty normal for a bad relationship. Once it's ended and you've done the grieving though, you're left with the relief and the joy and the jealousy and fear disappears. It really does get easier, promise.

When I was in the same boat with my ex-h, I asked myself if I wanted to be in the same position in 10 years time. It was the motivation I needed, and I never looked back.

Lovely, don’t think about what you’re leaving focus upon what you can gain and that is finding someone who, whilst happy in yourself, will appreciate who you are, and make you feel happier and stronger than you ever thought you could be 😊x