Maintaining a relationship whilst staying apart

[Weallhavevalidopinions]

Is it possible to maintain a fairly newish relationship whilst staying apart. It's been 10 weeks now since we met up and due to health and his occupation will be at least July before we meet again.

I am struggling and feel just end it now
AIBU - keep going and find ways to keep relationship interesting whilst apart (suggestions of how welcome)
YANBU - end it and concentrate on family and day to day and avoid stressing about how to keep relationship going

I have been with my husband for 10 years and he has been in the Navy the whole time.

When we first got together we always had a long distance relationship and have periods of 4 months plus with absolutely no contact at all

We used to have phone sex, sent each other nude photos, sent jokes, romantic texts, emails and when we couldn’t contact each other at all he keeps a diary and I write him letters which we give each other when we meet again.

If it’s worth it it will work, and think what the reunion will be like

Thanks, would have to try some of those.

Never had phone sex .... never sent a nude photo (need good lighting ... not the best of figures!)

Jokes - yes don't that and clips etc but getting a bit predictable now

10 years apart whilst he is in the Navy - wow - I am think 10 weeks is bad! Oops

To be fair you won’t have a wealth of other options right now. Gets a bit frustrating after A while via virtual means only but maybe agree to take a step back and reconnect properly again when can meet ? Save on the angst levels ?

I say be creative 😈

Just take a picture of your tits/arse/foot - whatever he is into and send it to him out of the blue. My DH loves that

Why are you stressing about the relationship? Do you have anxiety? I've been in LDR for a long time. Yea, it is nice to meet more often but daily video calls and desire to be together kept it going. I don'tdo sexting, nude pics or phone sex but texting and sharing the little things are important.

If keeping the relationship together stresses you to the point where you want to break up, it is not a good sign. Just take a step back and think if it is due to the current situation or if it is the relationship itself. If you have anxiety in general, talk to your partner and share the feelings and maybe make some plans for the future, watch the same movie on netflix etc.

The thing is I am used to this life - this is new to you so it’s difficult.

Op, while I appreciate the suggestion has been meant, please be very very careful about sending nude photos. Sending nudes to a man you haven't known very long is very different to sending them to your husband of 10 years. I wouldn't take the risk personally, especially if you're already questioning if the relationahip will last.

I sent them to him before he was my husband of 10 years - surely if you are sleeping together there is trust there?

I started dating someone a few weeks before lockdown. Not enough time together to decide if it would bloom into anything more serious so i wasn’t sure if I should even stay in contact.

However, we do keep in touch a couple of times a week, but as there’s not much new to say anything more would probably kill of the romance.

When we do talk, we send each other pictures and videos of what we are doing, make future plans and keep it more low key (like I do with friends at the moment).

DH is a military officer and when we were dating he we was posted abroad for a few months. It almost didn’t work. We don’t do phone sex or nude photos or anything like that. It’s very hard to have a new relationship with somebody you don’t see.

Since we moved in together he’s not been away more than two nights and because of his branch, it’s unlikely he’ll have to go away again for a long period.

Got together with my husband January, he went to Afghanistan in the March for 7 months. Married 4 years later and he went to Canada for 6 months 4 weeks after the wedding. It is different as I met him knowing it would have times where It would be long distance, but It’s doable, you have both got to be willing to work for it.

Also - in general with a LDR or any relationship I think it’s healthy and important to have your own hobbies, friends activities which don’t have to involve each other.

Which at the moment is very doable 🤣

It wouldn't be for me personally MadameBee. Obviously not every man will turn out to be a twat, but plenty of women trust their partners and find out later that the trust was misplaced. I would need to be very very sure of a man's character before sending anything that might make its way onto the Internet. "Revenge porn" is a massive and fast growing catagory for a reason! For me a new relationship would not cut the mustard. Not saying you were wrong to do it and glad it worked out for you, but I think the OP should be cautious. If the consequences from it going wrong would be bigger than the benefit from it going right, don't do it.

I would never send anything with my face on it (early on).

I think we are all aware of the risks of most things but we are also all adults.

For sure, I have nothing against sending nudes. Consenting adults can do whatever they please! But it sounds like the op is in a very new relationship (hardly more than a few months I would guess from her post) so I think its worth pointing out that there can be issues with sending nudes beyond whether the lighting is flattering! But op if that's your thing and you can be 99.9% sure he's trustworthy then crack on, have fun :)

Thanks for your replies. I appreciate them.

I don't have general anxiety so not idea why. Probably just looking for ideas to keep things fresh until we meet up again. Not sure about nudes, however, I like the idea of bits of the body.... without face..

Thanks