Dh thinks aibu to not want to see his family is we are allowed from Monday!

[SWemily]

Good Evening,

I would like to find out your opinions on this.

I am shielding, have been given the letters and text. I have a rare disease that I was born with.

In our household there is me (26) Dh (30) DD (2)
DD is a key worker and has been working still. We have been keeping to the rules of course.

Problem is, DH parents are begging him to let them come round to see our new place (they've not seen it yet (since feb) ) i said, they can't.

1. Fil is supposed to be also isolating for 12 weeks.
2. In their household is his sis who is working in a dentist, his brother who goes off to see his friends probably and works. And a 9 year old.

DH states that because they've been adhering to isolation rules etc, there is no harm in them coming round to see us, and no risk? As he also works outside the house and comes in, so I'm already at risk with him?

I can see his point but then I feel like telling him to go be at his parents then while I fully isolate with dd. I'd prefer them not to come round as I don't know if they've been out or where etc as they won't tell us because they know I get strict about infections and illnesses before covid happened lol

Aibu?

Just realised title error. If*

No.

As you are shielding they can't come round.

Your family can go around to theirs as long as they continue to stay away from you.

If you're shielding then it's for 12 weeks from the letter, not until whenever your DH feels like stopping. I would say definitely not and he's selfish to suggest it.

No they should definitely not come round. It's wrong of them to even suggest it, let alone put pressure on you.

If fil is supposed to be isolating for 12 weeks he shouldn't be going anywhere either, especially not if his son is a keyworker.

YANBU, your DP working might be an unavoidable risk but adding more chances of exposure needlessly isn't shielding.

They can facetime/call/work other stuff out to see each other as best they can. His parents won't spontaniously combust if they don't see your new place for a bit longer.

Yanbu- you deserve to feel safe in your home and your DH should support you.

No. They can’t come. Send them a copy of your letter.

Well even if we are allowed it may not be Monday it may be the week after or not . You are shielding so it'll still be no for you I'm afraid .

He can go to visit his parents and then stay there but NO WAY should they be visiting your from what you have said.
He is being very unreasonable to even think about this.
He must wait until the 12 wks shielding is up and you have been told that you can relax the measures you have put in place to reduce the risk to your health.
His parents will just have to wait a bit longer.

Thank you all.

I think with eid coming he doesn't want to upset them as they haven't seen DD since February. But I mean they didn't even bother to text on his birthday or hers so they can't be too fussed. They did ask to see the letter, which I sent a pic of over whatsapp.

I'll stick to the advice given and he can move in with them if he wants!

No they can’t come round and Dh shouldn’t suggest it. There seems to be a pattern of men who want to break the rules for their parents. Whilst they may wish to see your place it’s not essential and they will have to wait.

Everyone I know who isn’t living with their family, is doing Eid via Facetime / WhatsApp etc. Could that be arranged?