To have thought a psychiatrist would have more understanding

[Takemebackto]

My adult ds was assessed by a psychiatrist in a&e on Friday. He was asked how his sleep was and he responded that it wasn’t good. The psychiatrist responded and said if you were that tired you would sleep. Aibu to think someone with all that training would understand that it’s not always that simple?

Wow
Who is this croc?

I was very surprised yes there are things you can do to improve your sleep and my son understands that but unfortunately for some people no matter what they do they can’t sleep

OP my flat is really badly painted because it was done in a period of 72 hours no sleep

I went to work and ended up painting at night

After three days, my boss said, don’t come back to work, it’s dangerous.

The doctor finally gave me sleeping pills
My normally low blood pressure had gone very high

This was a few years ago and I know they have got worse about prescribing sleeping pills, which is a shame as they can break a cycle of no sleep

Has any mention been made of amitryptaline? It doesn’t work for me but I know is good for some people and they are happier about prescribing it

One of the biggest realisations of my adult life was discovering that 'educated' people aren't always intelligent in a way that matters or possess common sense.

The ability to retain and then regurgitate enough information to pass an exam doesn't mean somebody will make a good clinician. I have found many doctors to be unable to grasp fairly simple common sense concepts.

A paediatrician once told me that my eldest son's father wouldn't try to harm him because he was his father and fathers love their children - he was giving him food with nuts in when he had a potentially severe nut allergy.

And a paediatric psychiatrist told me that my youngest son couldn't be autistic because he could make eye contact and hold a conversation - yeah, because people with aspergers generally can do that surprisingly enough, and autism is a spectrum.

The worrying thing is that these people sometimes have your life in their hands.

Hope your son feels better soon.

If you want to share any other info OP, I’m sure you’ll get some advice, but I completely understand if you’d rather not.

Insomnia is one of the worst things I've ever experienced. I felt like I was actually going insane and got to the point I was scared to close my eyes because I knew I couldn't sleep so trying to sleep would give me a panic attack.

My full sympathies with your son. Has he been prescribed anything by a GP? Zoplicone and diazepam worked for me in the short term just to get me out of the insomnia cycle.

That A&E Doctor is a prick.

My DD16 has been unwell for some time but at a meeting a few months ago I managed to persuade her to explain her feelings around her appearance - so possible body dysmorphia. The psychiatrist leaned forward to peer at her and said "well, it would be better if you used make up; you have actually got a spot" pointing at a tiny blemish on her flawless skin.

Later DD said to me "I thought these people were supposed to look after me?" Stories I could tell ....

@DishingOutDone I have no words!

He's an idiot. Sleep begets sleep. Insomnia can make you insane. It's used as a form of torture. As a PP suggested, a short term med might help him.
When my oldest gets too amped to sleep, we use melatonin. However, he is not depressed. So perhaps short term meds and then try that after? With GP approval, of course.

One of the biggest realisations of my adult life was discovering that 'educated' people aren't always intelligent in a way that matters or possess common sense

That's very true.

On the whole OP I have always found psychiatrists to be lacking in fundamental human kindness. (Yes yes I know 'Not all psychiatrists etc etc) They tend to be obscenely intelligent but all the ones I've ever met in a proffesional capacity have been very cold and 'Off' emotionally. Chicken/Egg I guess.

Phenergan is a decent insomnia fix, available over the counter too.

I spent years in the mental health system and I can honestly say that 90% of the doctors and therapists and whoever that I met were both stupid and uncaring (or doing a very good impression of being so).

"I want to kill myself."
"Have you tried having a cup of tea?"

This was the solution for everything. Yes, I've tried having a cup of tea, I'm British. But even tea hasn't solved this one.

Keep trying OP, eventually you might get someone who isn't an utter bellend or they'll prescribe something just to get you to fuck off.

I have met several through work and most, not all, we're definitely on another planet. Zero understanding or compassion regarding learning disability, personality disorder etc.

I seldom meet an incompetent or uncaring psychologist however.

Unfortunately I have to agree with PPs that there is no guarantee such professionals have the skills or knowledge required to treat people's mental health adequately, never mind compassionately. It is so saddening. I am so sorry your DC felt so let down.

Most of the psychiatrists I've known have been the least understanding people you could hope to meet, but that example is impressively ridiculous.

The one psychiatrist I knew socially was a very strange woman. Homophobic as hell and not that bright.

I do think our mental health system trains the compassion (and basic human decency) out of even the best people.

As someone who spent a decade in psychiatric services this really doesn’t surprise me at all unfortunately.

@rosiethehen I agree. I've always chuckled when people say "oh s/he's a doctor or has got a PhD so s/he's clever/intelligent/a genius".

No s/he's not. They are knowledgable in their field yes but not necessarily
about everything else. They may well be clever or a genius but that's an aside, not because they're a doctor or have got a PhD or something. So many others are more intelligent but not as knowledgable in their specific field of study.

I have seen a psychologist (not psychiatrist) who was deeply unempathetic. So you can get bad apples in any profession. The problem with bad apples in mental health services is the long term negative impact of just one thoughtless comment (e.g the spot/make up comment above).

I found zopiclone brilliant but wasn't allowed enough of it (addictive apparently) to solve my long term insomnia. The amitriptyline does the trick and the GP seems happy to prescribe 10mg per night on repeat so that's my long term solution.

What guff. Sounds like the usual bollocks about sleep hygiene that assumes your main (/only) problem is that you consider your debilitating chronic insomnia to be a problem. And that if you just shrug your shoulders and say ‘well I guess it can’t be that bad or I would die’ all your anxiety would go away and you’d sleep like a baby. I’m so sorry your son is going through this.

@CrimeAndMumishment ‘cup of tea’ is what my mental health nurse suggested to ease my anxiety that is so bad I want to throw myself under a bus to stop the constant intrusive thought.

Not all health care professionals are very caring or good at their Job!

A friend is accessing help for her severe anxiety/depression online at the moment. Her recent favourite is 'yes, the current situation is a bit worrying, but how do you think you would feel it all this (coronavirus, wfh with 2 young kids and a key worker husband, etc) weren't happening?'.

I remember 'why do you think you're anxious?' from a GP - decades later I realised that I'm anxious because I have anxiety, I'll still be anxious if you remove whatever I'm currently fixated on, I'll find something else. (Proven by the current situation, in fact, at the moment I can't sleep because... well, I don't actually know, I'm not actually worried about Corona, so should be less anxious right? Wrong!)

Insomnia is the pits OP, I hope you find a solution for your DS.