To feel sorry for myself

[cakemeupbeforeyougogo]

... that neither 19 year old or 15 year old dds give a flying fuck about me?

Have come down with a bug these past few days. Still working a stressful full time job as a social worker (single parent). It's crazy challenging times working at the moment.

Not one of them has asked how I am, offered to make a cuppa, clean house. Dd (19) even moaned that I'd used a tin of 'her' soup today as I made myself lunch, feverishly.

How have I brought up kids so utterly selfish? You'd think at their age, they could think of someone else besides themselves. I work to provide for them. I support dd1 financially at uni. She's just doesn't care. They never offer to help around the house. I always gave to read the riot act and 'instruct' them. I've just had enough.

• have to

No advice, OP, just and hope you're feeling better soon.

If you say to them that you're unwell and need them to step up, will they listen?

No. I said that dd1 today. Both know I'm unwell. I went to bed at 7pm last night. Was 'on call' all day today.

Why are you still working with a fever ?

I've just had to spell out to my boy (27) what is required from him in a difficult current situation. I hope he's got it but there's no guarantee.

Sorry you're poorly. Tell them straight try not to screech , make it clear what is required.

Get well soon

I'm working with a fever because it's not bad enough to not to. I know this is relatively defined but if I don't work 'on call', then others in my team have to take up the slack and anyone who knows the pressure of social care at this point in time acknowledges how we're all working flat out to make sure needs are met. We are wfh by the way.

I could excuse the 15 year old but the 19 year old should have come out the other side by now and have a bit of empathy for other people.

Tell them how you are feeling - hopefully them seeing you upset like that is the kick up the ass they need.

Get well soon

Thank you for all the good wishes.

19 yr old doesn't seem to have come out of the other side yet. I'm really upset at her lack of concern, to be honest.

I'm not excusing their behaviour, but teens can be selfish arses by nature. Maybe they see you're still working, so that's not quite clicking in their narrow mind that you're feeling that rubbish. Why not inform work, stay in bed for a day or so and read them the riot act when you feel better?