Wondering if the power of positivity can help us here one last time.
I’ve been on MN for years. Although have name changed for this.
But since I’ve been here, you ladies have got me through everything, DV, infant loss, infertility, an extremely sick DP who was housebound for almost two years, university, losing all our money, being stalked by abusive xh many years after I left. And so on.
I’m so lucky that DP finally Started getting better after 19 months at home last year, and he’s been making slow and steady progress since. With weekly walks since Christmas and now daily or EOD since early March. We’ve even found out we are expecting a baby this year after I was told I was infertile at nineteen. everything’s going so well and I really don’t know how I would’ve managed all the shit I was carrying in life if it wasn’t for you all.
Anyway because of all those things. We have been in the queue for social housing to both get us away from ExH who’s harassment was both persistent and terrifying and to support us with necessary adaptions for DH for an awfully long time. We can barely afford our private rent, and I use the food bank and pay bills on a credit card (I had to take a NMW job when DP got sick and housebound just a year after we met and rents are high.)
Anyway, we have been placed in the top five for a beautiful 1920s property just twenty minutes from my mum and dad, but out in the sticks where no one (including ex h) would be able to find us. And it would be an absolute dream come true.
DP thinks he should be back to work for 2021 so hopefully we will just get back on our feet and save like mad to pass it on to the next family in need.
I’ve been working overtime and night shifts to keep aftloat, and hiding, and caring and grieving and running away For almost a decade due to xh and this would change everything. We wouldn’t be rich but we would be safe. There is space to have Dps physio bike and my mum and dad can come over for tea. I just can’t believe we are on the shortlist for anything let alone this.
I just wondered if I could have some luck - some good vibes or prayers, finger and toe crossing or anything. I’m tired. Everything has been so heavy. For so long.
I could walk to the co op without looking over my shoulder.
I could afford to take more than six weeks maternity leave.
My body wouldn’t hurt from helping DP because there would be all the things he needs to support him, he wouldn’t need my shoulder for the three lumpy steps.
I could know our child was going to be safe and not be followed and threatened by Xh like we have been.
I could breathe, and live, and have a life and I can’t believe that we are so close.
Thank you for your time ❤️ Have a lovely weekend xx