Free time

[whoisright12]

My husband normally gets in from work between 1/2 everyday. Before lockdown he used to collect our son from his nursery at 4 pm leaving him with a few hours of free time to himself (which is fine).

I've been on sick leave for an extended period of time and have started a phased return this week. A mix of mornings and afternoons. I am able to work from home.

He can still go out to work.

Of the 5 days I'm working this week two have been afternoons. Leaving me with 3 free afternoons and on the days I'm working afternoons I've obviously been looking after our child in the morning.

Of those three afternoons H has come in and had a long nap one one of them, spent 2 hours on his PlayStation on one of them and on the third one, expects to have another nap so he can play on his PlayStation until 3am later that evening.

Which means, as usual, I have zero free time to myself. This is the same both before and during lockdown.

When I raise this he says "get a hobby" and it turns into an argument. However, on the odd occasion I do go out with my friends I get "what time are you coming home" texts etc.

So my question is, is he being unfair?

We jointly own it.

He seen me looking at houses to rent earlier and kicked off. He told me to leave so I packed mine and our sons bag. Then just as I was leaving I had a change of heart.

I refused and told him to go. He's packed his bag and gone to stay with his parents.

It's good that you'll get some breathing space Who. I feel for you but at the same time admire you for taking action when the realisation has set in.
Not sure what your work situation is but tomorrow is the time to seek legal advice.
I don't know if your H will suggest relationship counselling or if he's in agreement that this is the end. Do remember though that he doesn't have to agree, I just mean will he give you a hard time, or accept this.
Time for you to look out for you. 💐

KOKO

My DH is introvert so needs downtime and liked his PlayStation but me and the DC always came first.

I don't really know what I want to be honest. I mean I love him, but I'm so deeply unhappy and feel so unwanted/unloved.

We have a small child and I don't really want him to be living away from his dad but he'll sense how unhappy I am.

I know he's only been gone since this morning but I haven't at all missed him being around. We will see what the coming days bring.

I bet he won't even contact me to ask about our little one.

To be honest you might both be happier this way. He can play his games and you don’t have to put up with him. Some people co parent better apart

Hopefully you're right. Although I'm not really sure how much parenting he'll do anyway.

If we get to that point he'll probably be sad to be forced into not playing his games. Then when our son is with him, he'll just sit in his phone anyway!

Well done for taking the step Op. I was in a very similar situation with my ex and his xbox! Heartbreaking memories of our 1 year old daughter crawling around his feet while he was absorbed by the game. 2 years later we get on well as friends and Co parent, was the best decision I ever made.

Your son will be happier with a happy mum too

Hope you get everything sorted and thrive xx