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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this might be a bit of a fiddle?

8 replies

suspiciousmindsthinkalike · 28/04/2020 11:33

Now, I may be being totally unreasonable here but I'm interested to know what other people would make of this...

So someone has set up a help group for our area to assist people who can't get out to do their shopping etc. Marvellous idea as we have lots of elderly here. The nearest big supermarket is a few miles away and the number of buses has reduced so they were struggling to get things. He launched it as soon as lockdown began.

Anyway. There was a huge response, and he was very busy doing shopping for lots of people, and when people started getting furloughed, quite a few people offered to help out. Everyone filled in forms and took over various areas. The idea was that he would pass on "jobs" to other people but is insistent on doing all the shopping. There are dozens of volunteers sitting idle wanting to help and he's run off his feet.

Aibu in wondering why? Maybe he's just a control freak but with the number of shopping trips he's doing I can't help wondering if there's something fishy going on. Maybe I'm just a suspicious old cow and he's a saint!

OP posts:
Dyrne · 28/04/2020 11:37

Some of these groups have turned into little dictatorships with people thriving off the hero-worship they’re getting. Some possibly do have people wanting to take advantage of the vulnerable.

Or It might be harmless, it might be that he just likes helping or feels if he takes on all the ‘risk’ of shopping then he’s doing people a favour? Or that he knows that he won’t scam or hurt anyone whereas he can’t vouch for any of the other volunteers?

Lightofthephoenix · 28/04/2020 11:37

He likes being out the house and by shopping for others, he gets to go out more than once a day?

Wants all the praise for himself?

antisupermum · 28/04/2020 11:38

I would assume he is keeping the shopping jobs for himself as he has been doing it for a while now and can clearly be trusted with peoples money, and certain people he is helping will be familiar with him already, with a level of trust there.
He doesnt know the other people who are volunteering. Maybe THEY are the ones who see this as a good way to gain entry in to elderly peoples' homes and take ownership of their money. Unless he is vetting every volunteer, it sounds like he is making the logical and safest option to keep the movement of money to one individual. Stops any "No, John done the shopping that day. No, it was Mary"...

MumW · 28/04/2020 11:41

Maybe he's clocking up Clubcard/nectar/etc points.

suspiciousmindsthinkalike · 28/04/2020 11:42

I suppose he might be thinking he can't trust other people, but then nobody knows if he's trustworthy or not either.

OP posts:
Lightofthephoenix · 28/04/2020 13:43

If anything does happen, money going missing, only one person can get the blame, himself.

suspiciousmindsthinkalike · 28/04/2020 14:51

@Lightofthephoenix you're absolutely right, very good point. My concern is that lots of the people being helped are elderly and vulnerable so that could be wide open to abuse. Very worrying but hopefully he's a genuine saint and my worries are unfounded.

OP posts:
minettechatouette · 28/04/2020 14:53

I'd also feel concerned. You could suggest that he start keeping "accounts" showing the amounts people have given him, the amounts he has spent etc. He might be offended though...

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