AIBU to think I will struggle going out?

[MamaKarmaLlama]

I’ve been in lockdown so long (we self isolated early due to bad coughs) probably haven’t left the small village I live in for 6 weeks. I haven’t really seen anyone except my immediate family to talk to for ages. I don’t even drive so haven’t been to shops. I’m starting to feel very anxious about life returning to ‘normal’. I can’t imagine having to get on a train and go somewhere or hang out in crowds or socialise. I feel like I might be developing agoraphobia or some form of it. AIBU to think this must be happening to many other folk? I’m genuinely worried about how I’ll cope after lockdown as this is the new ‘normal for me’.

God no, I can't wait to get out and socialise. I want restaurants, pubs and lots of people!

Totally hear you OP.
Been on lockdown a long time here too. I go out for short walks in places I win't bump into people but last time I tried to do a food shop I cried before I went and when I got back. And was shaking while I was there.
I just don't want to go out. Luckily DH likes doing the food shop.

I definitely get wobbly when I have to do a shop now. My body doesn't know what to do with itself anymore!

It’s bizarre because I was extremely social before all this happened but now I don’t think I really could handle that again. I kind of like my ‘bubble’ or I suppose it’s the least scary for me at the moment, if that makes sense.

I was having a similar conversation with someone last week. I think that people who haven't been out are imagining that the world is not continuing. That everybody is at home like they are.

When you go out you see people servicing cars and eating chips walking up the street. People getting on and off buses and taking their cat to the vets. Obviously lots of places are closed and there are queues outside some shops but it's all very civilised.

My 13 year old was agog the other day when she saw a boy from her school walking past with his backpack on and full school uniform laughing on a video call. She couldn't seem to wrap her head round it that he was still doing exactly what she had been doing six weeks ago.

I suffered really extreme agoraphobia a few years ago and if you're starting to feel like this then my advice would be to try and start doing something about it now (still following lockdown rules of course).

Do you leave the house everyday? If not I'd start there with a daily walk.

I'm assuming someone else in your household is driving to the shops? If you feel like you can, have them drive you to the shop and wait in the car while you go in. Start at quieter times when you're not likely to have to queue outside, maybe pick a smaller shop rather than a large supermarket, and wear gloves if you're more comfortable. Alternatively does your village have a shop you can walk to?
Agoraphobia is really horrible but it's good that you've recognised that you might be experiencing it and can start to do something about it!

Same.

I could do with a trip to Boots or Superdrug for a load of (non essential) stuff such as hair dye and face serum. I tell myself I’m not going even though they’re open because it’s non essential but deep down I know it’s because I’m scared of catching it.

I read garden centres might open next week. I love garden centres and I first I was really excited......then I thought well I won’t go.

I haven’t even been to a supermarket since this started.

I’m scared my employer may want me back at work.

I was thinking the other day that a lot of people will feel like this. I'm a teacher and I it used to take me a long time to not feel panicky and claustrophobic using the tube in London to get to work and being in an assembly after a long summer holiday. I do think I'm quite prone to agoraphobia though, perhaps some people are finding the opposite.

I’m worried about this too. I’ve been shielding for six weeks, my house is in the middle of a large village but on a private track so although I can see lots of houses I only see my immediate neighbours (and their visitors 🤔)

I have stages, yearning to go outside then scared of how I’ll feel when I can.

Completely sympathise, and it's an understandable feeling.

I felt like this early on but now make myself go out for a walk every day. I go to the small supermarket thing at the end of our riad. I haven't been in a proper big supermarket for ages though and I get panicky when I see people coming towards me when out walking but I'm not giving up. I can totally see the potential for my fear to become unmanageable so I'm going out every day whether I like it or not.

I've had similar thoughts but about driving. About 5 years ago I had a panic attack whilst driving on a motorway. This seriously affected my ability to drive and I slowly got back to driving but never on motorways or busy dual carriageways. In the last 6 weeks I've driven once a fortnight to my nearest town 5 miles away to go to the supermarket. I really worry about how i will cope when ee are allowed to do other journeys.

I’m usually rather antisocial apart from with my friends and family, stranger danger, but I can’t wait to get back out where the people are! I’m even saying hello to strangers whilst out on walks haha! But I’m still going to work so having lots of interaction too.

I do go out for walks but it’s when I think about going outside my immediate ‘bubble’ that I panic....so I suppose it’s not agoraphobia maybe more social anxiety?

i go out everyday for a walk, early. i feel like i am holding my breath until i get home. i feel shaky if i see anyone else though it has been easy to avoid them. i haven't driven since lockdown, being a v anxious driver like the previous poster. i know the roads are quieter but the thought of an accident terrifies me. we have been lucky enough to have food deliveries so i haven't been into any shop- the thought of that panics me too. my hands are shaking just typing this.

I could do with a trip to Boots or Superdrug for a load of (non essential) stuff such as hair dye and face serum.

I know what you mean. I went to a large Tesco yesterday to do a food shop, but couldn't resist a wander around the clothes section.

It isn’t even that I’m scared of contracting the virus, more that I’m becoming scared of normal life....or too used to this kind of normal. I’m f that makes sense.

I agree that a lot of people are beginning to get used to a slower pace of life.

I wonder how many people during this crisis have realised how inconvenient it is not to be able to drive?

I used to go here there and everywhere without thought, then 3.5 years ago I developed a serious heart condition and was unable to go out really because I would become breathless so quickly so walking any kind of distance was impossible for me.

Then last year I had some intervention which meant that my stamina was vastly restored and the breathlessness almost non existent. The first time I went out anywhere after that felt like I was in a whole new experience. I’ve never had anxiety but it was certainly one of those things where I seemed detached from the world around me.

Now I’ve not been out since the 20th of March other than for two blood tests which were essential but otherwise I’m considered at risk so staying home.Now my thought is very much around not wanting to go out or even see anyone such as my family or partner for fear of catching it.

I do think that for those reasons there will be many who won’t then all rush out which is probably not a bad thing considering, and actually people feeling like that will hopefully mean a gradual easing of restrictions is more likely to be successful.

I‘ve been feeling the same. I‘ve been to the supermarket once in 6 weeks and felt very stressed and anxious while there. As a pp mentioned, I am also worried about driving. I‘ve only driven once (a few minutes, for the supermarket trip). I got my licence last year and have been quite a nervous driver anyway. Now I‘m worried not driving for a long time is really going to set me back :(

Well it only took you 6 weeks for this to be your new normal, after however many years of the previous normal. You’ll survive, I’m sure.

I understand where you're coming from, I don't drive and been working from home / furloughed since March. I get anxious going out just to Tesco across the road or going for a walk. I think this must be the longest period of my life where I haven't been on some sort of transport, bus/car/train

I have wondered whether people will be developing forms of agoraphobia as a result of COVID. I'm ok about going out with my partner for our daily walk but going to the supermarket on my own is daunting (he's asthmatic so I have to do this).

The day after lockdown, I had to drive 20 miles to collect some equipment to enable me to work at home and I felt very panicked the whole time.

For those worried about driving - just start with a very short trip on a quiet familiar road. Even just round the block a couple of times on your own street. It will get you back into the rhythm of gear changing, steering etc and build your confidence.
I was hospitalised with Covid and was too ill to drive for a month in total. I felt anxious getting in the car again, but had to drive ten miles to the nearest supermarket. A gentle drive down a deserted dual carriageway soon felt normal again.
The fear of crowds and socialising is harder to deal with, since it is quite rational to fear infection with a potentially lethal virus.
You may feel happier wearing a close fitting face mask and gloves, avoiding busy times of day, and keeping the 2m distancing. But unless shielding for medical reasons, a daily walk is a great help in maintaining mental health as well as physical fitness.

Judging by the amount of people who aren’t leaving the house at all despite not being in an at risk group, I think there will be many feeling this way.

I think there'll be an epidemic of anxiety disorders on the horizon