Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pissed off at doing everything 'right' and things getting worse

51 replies

Incontinencesucks · 28/04/2020 00:05

So as my username suggests since the birth of my youngest of a few months ago my pelvic floor has been...iffy shall we say.

The last couple if weeks I've really upped my game with being diligent with kegels, pilates and core exercises only to find it suddenly 10x worse.

Not only have i had urgent rushes all the last few days, I've pissed myself 3 times. I drink more than enough water, make sure to empty my bladder properly each time, do the bloody exercises and don't drink alcohol.

So why i why on top of that did i just spend an hour on the loo constantly needing yet another trickle? What is wrong? Has my new diligence irritated my bladder too much?

I know it's not important in the grand scheme of things but any advice anyone? AIBU to wonder why upping my game means more bloody incontinence??

OP posts:
ShastaBeast · 28/04/2020 00:07

Are you sure it’s not a UTI?

Notverybright · 28/04/2020 00:11

It is important. Did you see a physio at the hospital? Do you have a number that you can call? You need to get help with this. I'm so sorry incontinence is awful Flowers

Frozenfan2019 · 28/04/2020 00:13

Speak to your GP and get referred to an incontinence nurse. I am sure there'll be a wait anyway so might as well get on the list. It definitely sounds like you need external help with this.

Be reassured they will sort you out

Mumdiva99 · 28/04/2020 00:15

It could be an infection. It might be worth getting that checked out.

Have you been for physio? If not ask for a referral. I also found losing weight and doing aerobics helped....with protection obviously!!

Original poster
Incontinencesucks · 28/04/2020 00:26

Thanks everyone, it's getting me a bit down i admit.

I've not seen a physio. I spoke to my GP and she tested my pelvic floor and said it was strong at my 6 week check. She told me leaking was normal after multiple children and didn't seem to think it was odd. I know they are run off their feet and any kind of referral probably wouldn't happen now.

It's the sudden worsening that's worrying me. I keep putting off sex, which I'd like, as i feel something is pressing down there. Feels a bit like wearing a tampon which is slipping down at bad times, if that makes sense.

I didn't consider a uti though, I'm not sure how I'd know. I guess ill have to call tomorrow and ask them.

I'm working on losing my pregnancy weight, but anything too aerobic and i leak or suddenly have to rush to go.

OP posts:
Seaweed42 · 28/04/2020 00:33

The type of exercise you are doing could be making it worse. You could have a mild bladder prolapse, in which case stomach exercises, things like 100s in Pilates sit ups etc, will press the pelvic floor further down. Stop the exercise for several days and see if it improves. You need to see a Pelvic Floor Specialist Physio so follow up on that.

Leflic · 28/04/2020 00:39

I agree overdoing it. My Pilates instructor said women were over tightening the wrong bits which needed relaxing. The tension was making them wee more.
I just needed to lose a bit a bit of weight and it stopped on it’s own though.

Original poster
Incontinencesucks · 28/04/2020 00:40

Oh no i didn't realise the exercises could make it worse. I thought core strengthening could only help. I've been planking and doing ab exercises and doing my kegels while moving.

I checked i didn't have split stomach muscles any more so thought they would be fine. I better contact my GP, if they'll talk to me about it. Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
Incontinencesucks · 28/04/2020 00:43

Than you. That's interesting that you suggest that Seaweed and Leflic as i have intensified my exercises. I will rest for a few days and speak to my GP too. I never considered i should be relaxing anything, i thought tensing was the best was to rectify it as it had to be weak.

OP posts:
Temporarilyc · 28/04/2020 00:53

Have you been examined for pelvic organ prolapse? I have a mild/moderate cystocele (bladder prolapse) and I had the same symptoms as you in the early months postpartum.

I'm 12 months PP now and things have gotten alot better.

ttim985y · 28/04/2020 01:01

I was also going to say the type of exercise you're doing could be making it worse. I have pelvic organ prolapse and have to be very careful with core exercises.

2tired2function · 28/04/2020 02:34

Agreed that tightening can make things worse depending what your problem is. I’ve been seeing a women’s health Physio once a week for the last year (in the US so no limit on visits) and it’s been pretty eye opening, it really isn’t all about tightening your pelvic floor!

indub · 28/04/2020 05:03

"She told me leaking was normal after multiple children"
Hmm Getting arthritis and diabetes as you get older are also normal but GPs still treat those. This affects many women's lives and is often not taken seriously enough. There are many good treatments and your long term function is better if started earlier. Ask for a referral for a pelvic floor physiotherapist. They'll give an accurate assessment and check on your kegels, and give a plan.

Definitely stop the planking and any high impact exercise, or exercise that stresses your abdominal wall, before you see a physio.

Friendsofmine · 28/04/2020 06:10

Too many kegels have had a similar sudden worsening effect on me too before now.

I too think it'll calm down again if you stop the exercises.

Savingshoes · 28/04/2020 06:18

Search "Jilly Bond" she's got some excellent research.
Another idea is your front muscles are strong but your bum muscles not so much.
They work in a canopy and if you're working all your front with kegals etc but not sqautting and have a flat bottom this could be part of the problem.
Another issue is, you are discouraged from doing too much for the first 5 weeks. You should do kegals 3x a day for the rest of your life anyway.
If you don't fill your bladder it might become over sensitive. So full glass of fluid instead of sips here and there. 8 glasses a day at least with more in the mornings.

Belleende · 28/04/2020 06:20

I wouldn't do this without taking some proper advice, I have had some mild bladder issues post kids. Think trickles when on trampoline, some mild urgency on occasion. I recently started C25K. The first week was bad, was getting quite a bit of leakage, but it has massively improved week by week. I am now leak free all the time even on a 20min run. I am not sure it would be advisable with anything other than mild issues tho.

nannybeach · 28/04/2020 06:52

If you are not doing them 100% corrctly the xcersises can make things worse. once you get them right, yes you need to do them for life, men should too. Unfortunately some (expert) schools of thought say void your bladder regularly, others say you need to build up capacity, so you can hold on. BTW, getting arthritus and becoming diabetic when you are older is not normal, its more likely!

lovemakespeace · 28/04/2020 07:13

Hi OP,

"as i feel something is pressing down there. Feels a bit like wearing a tampon which is slipping down at bad times"

This could definitely be a prolapse and it needs investigating. Agree back to GP and pelvic floor physio.

These issues are common but that doesn't make them something women should tolerate and there is help out there :)

Good luck!

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 28/04/2020 07:15

Agree about going to GP.

Things you might not have thought about that can help- you can buy a kegel machine (i think its called kegel 8) I used one after the birth of my second son and it worked REALLY well- stimulates the muscles for you.

You can also buy little weights to use to tighten up the kegel muscles. Really ingenious and definitely worth a try once you've ruled out prolapse etc

Sewingbea · 28/04/2020 07:17

You can self refer for pelvic floor support if your GP doesn't want to refer you (or so a women's health physiotherapist I knew through work told me). If you phone the physio department of your local hospital ask for a referral. Obviously I know that at the moment this is difficult with coronavirus but hopefully when things improve you will be seen. There's usually a waiting list so you could at least get yourself on it. You will need to ask for the women's health physio.

Littlecaf · 28/04/2020 07:17

Please go back to your GP and ask again for a check up. It took me three goes to get a diagnosis of a prolapse. From there I saw a womens health physio and it has improved a lot - even 15 mins on the trampoline with the kids is fine! Do go back.

Starfish1021 · 28/04/2020 07:19

Contact your GP again. I hate this attitude that some leaking is normal. That’s bullshit. Try and see a different GP if possible. My midwife told me it was normal but my GP was lovely (and pregnant with her second child!) so referred me pretty quickly. A UTI and as others have said maybe doing the wrong exercises.

AugieMarch · 28/04/2020 07:20

That tampon feeling does sound like a mild prolapse. I had the same feeling and saw a go and then a women's health physio who diagnosed miles bladder and uterus prolapse. The physio can help loads. They'll help you make sure you're doing your pelvic floor exercises properly and can also give you other exercises to improve your core that aren't going to put pressure on the pelvic floor (for example, some situp-style exercises can make it worse). I 100% recommend seeing a physio.

Roisin80 · 28/04/2020 07:23

Look at the hab-it website. I've started to do the exercises on it, and after just 10 days I feel an improvement. Good luck.

OllyBJolly · 28/04/2020 07:24

Same issue, despite doing all the exercises.

The first GP I saw was very dismissive "Some things we women just have to live with" Hmm The second referred me to a consultant who diagnosed a prolapse. I had an op and it made an amazing difference- restored to pre children condition.

Don't be fobbed off.