To resign at a time like this?

[iwanttobreakfreeeeee]

Im utterly miserable in my job and have been for as long as I can remember (been in a few different companies doing the same role so not just the place I work that’s the problem if you see what I mean). I’ve suffered from anxiety and at times depression all my adult life and work is where the anxiety really comes out. At the moment I can’t sleep, feel sick, chest pains and shortness of breath etc. I’ve been doing regular exercise as this usually helps me but at the moment it just makes me feel a bit better for an hour or so then I’m back to feeling the same way. I feel like I just want to resign and do something completely different with my life.

I do have enough savings to see me through for quite a while if I can’t find some other way to make money, but those savings are what we’d planned to use for early retirement so would be setting us back a fair bit. There’s also the risk of not being able to find other work for a very long time in the current situation, or of DH losing his (currently well paid) role. On the flip side to all the above, I’m generally considered a high performer at work so I don’t know what drives the anxiety.

Sorry for rambling, just wondering what you’d all do in my position?

Ps we have no dependent children

my ultimate dream would be to become self employed so that my only accountability was to myself- most of my anxiety stems from fear of colleagues thinking I’m doing a bad job/ being fired for making a mistake etc. It’s probably a crazy time to move to self employment though and I’ve no idea what business to start if I did

Can I just say unless you find a magical self-employed field with no clients this isn't the case. You have to constantly be your best self to attract and retain business in every form of self employment, you are always up front to sell yourself/your product/service, without the safety net of an employer if you're sick, on holiday etc. I am self employed, and I love it, but it took me several years to get to grips with the notion of selling myself, getting over imposter syndrome, you can't be self employed and say 'I'm okay at what I do' you have to sell yourself as the best baker, the best fitness instructor, the best bookkeeper otherwise no one is going to come to you. It takes a lot to get into that mindset unless you're a very cery confident person (or genuinely you ARE the best at what you do!)

Does it need to be all or nothing? Even if you don't know your end goal of exactly what you want to do, what steps can you take today to move towards that goal? Can you research other career oppertunities? Can you send out some CVs? There are masses and masses of free online courses at the moment from top universities around the world, can you sign up to one to help give you some guidance, skills or just direction?

You don't have to quit your job tomorrow to be moving forward, there is a middle ground where you can start to put things in place to leave, and that's going to make you feel a lot better on it's own without the guilt and worry that comes from just quitting. It's a really really bad time to be swapping jobs or going into self employment (I have 5 companies in a few different sectors but a wide network of friends with their own businesses, I can tell you if it's not essential people aren't spending right now. B2B is faring only slightly better than B2C, everything is crawling to a stop) but it's a great time to be upskilling, exploring options and developing your personal offering with a view to doing something more fulfilling in the medium term.

Good luck with anything you decide to do

counselling won't help, it's just sticking a plaster on, that eventually will need ripping off.
If you aren't happy and anxious you need to leave to preserve your mh, don't just cover it up or learn how to cope.
Be happy, or else there's no point to life.
What would you like to do more than anything. What steps would you need to get there? Don't answer me

I'd probably resign but don't take advice from me - my career is a fucking disaster area.

Have a good read about “imposter syndrome”. You will see many people who are good at their jobs feel the same. Medication for anxiety can really help as can CBT.
I would try these things first before giving up your job. It might take a load off talking to a trusted manager at work also if you feel
you could.

You should take some time off sick before making such a big decision. This isn’t the time to be thinking about getting another job. If it were me, I’d be trying to stick it out and maybe asking work to reduce my hours. You’ll retire one day and it’ll be a distant memory 💖

Have you tried Hypnosis, OP, to help you deal with your anxiety?

Hi - if you can I would really have a plan in place first of what you want to do or an alternative career.

My ex husband stiffened terribly with anxiety at work and he was made redundant. Slightly different I know but he first asked for 3 months to recover which then became a year and then suddenly it's 5 years and he struggled to get back into the work place and had fell so far behind in terms of his skills.

I think he was an extreme case but there is something to be said for still managing to work and make a plan for your exit strategy.

I know what it means to be so anxious because of a terrible work environment, finding it hard to get up in the morning, crying in my way to work, getting panic attacks every time I got a new task. But a big part problem was me - the people were terrible, don't get me wrong, but I caused my own anxiety because of a fear of getting fired, ruined my career, does everyone think I'm shit. The nest thing I did was take holiday, make an exit plan, go back to work after my holiday and pursue my exit plan at the same time. It's much easier to find a job when you have one already. And self-employment is difficult even in good times, clients are extremely demanding. The current economic climate is going from bad to worse.

Book some holiday, make a plan, and once that plan is in motion, you should resign.