What makes you happy?

[Hufflepuff88]

Like actually joyous? Nothing ever makes me feel happy. At best, I can feel contented. If anyone were to look at my life from the outside, I would seem to be happy. I have friends, 2 beautiful DC, a great flexible job and nice home and lovely DH. I just don’t ever feel anything. When I see my children happy I feel content but never more than that. I wake up every morning and my first thought is ‘not again’. The closest I come to feeling happy is when I ‘achieve’ something but that’s obviously not sustainable or relaxing.

To avoid a drip feed, I’ve had therapy for PTSD from an extremely abusive relationship but that was years ago and I think it’s behind me. I don’t feel constantly anxious as I did in those days, just a bit numb.

My cat

Apple pie and custard

A paella

Running

Are you on medication? This is why I stopped taking Prozac in the end. It stopped me feeling depressed, eventually, which was fab but then I realised I wasn’t feeling joy either. I stopped taking it gradually in agreement with gp. I now take duloxetine for anxiety and it doesn’t make me feel ‘numb’ in the same way. Other than that, really small things like lovely flowers, fresh cut grass, a big hug from dc genuinely make me feel joyful.

I just don’t ever feel anything. When I see my children happy I feel content but never more than that. I wake up every morning and my first thought is ‘not again’.

I have gone through intense periods of feeling this and still do. I personally think its at times when the repetitive groundhog day nature of life becomes too soul destroying and I need a shake up.

Things that make me happy : my pet, clean bedding, a hot cup of tea, crumble and custard, candles lit on an evening, a catch up with friends and family.

I am more content now that I have accepted that I regularly feel as above and that life is a lot of the time mundane. Neither super exciting nor super low but equally these things some of the time.

When one of my dogs falls asleep on my lap after a walk.

I get where you're coming from though OP as a long term anxiety and depression sufferer.

I actually aim for content, content is a goal

Spending time with my children (adults now), time in my sewing room, laughing with my DH and cake. In that order

My job
The footie on a Saturday (when it comes back)
My house
My friends
The one that got away

^^ Oh please jebus bring back the football.

Doing nothing.