Friend who boasts ALL THE TIME

[stormjensen]

How do you deal with people who boast about their kids and their school ALL THE TIME?

I have one particular person in mind... she is non stop talking about how much their kids can do in everything and there's nothing they can't do. And about how their school is so great at providing work for them during lockdown.

She LOVES to feel superior. I can't avoid her as she's a next door neighbour😱

Aibu to feel frustrated?

So because they are at a good school that is providing work for them, she's boasting? Maybe she's just pleased they are still getting an education

I hear you OP.....theres a couple who live locally, that everybody avoids, because they do exactly that. If only they knew what their kids REALLY get up to 🤣🤣

You’ll get loads of people on here saying there’s nothing wrong with being proud of your kids etc. I’ve deduced that a lot of mn’ers ARE the annoying people others can’t stand. Boasting about ANYTHING is annoying. I could say my six year old has just got her back tuck I gymnastics and I’m super proud and one of my friends would tell me her dd Who doesn’t even DO gymnastics could ‘probably do it as she is so athletic at everything!’

I just nod and smile

Just save it up for the day the kids in question turn into surly teenagers and come home with tattoos across their faces.

You know what gets me the most, I refuse to become one of these boastful people and go on about dd’s achievements or anything, I can’t imagine posting her sats results or anything on social media, bonkers, but sometimes I almost feel driven to it, by these people !!! Like I want to say ‘MY CHILD IS GREAT TOO!’ I resist but the constant ego stroking others provide them with is sometimes tempting 😂

I have a friend like this. I don't really talk to her anymore becuase the boasting got ott.
I find there is alot of this on social media of late. I unfollowed a few people after long boasting sessions about how well home schooling is going. I'm sure half of it isn't even true. Friend on sm posted a picture of a very professional 5 layered rainbow cake their 5 year old made or a 6 year old putting Beatles songs into order of preference.. its just reduculas.

@UnfinishedSymphon
Theirs go to a private school and ours a state school. Of course they're different. In order to get money off parents they have to keep providing education and make kids sit in front of the screen all day.

It's the way she makes it out as "they get the best education you are unfortunate"

In actual fact she struggled with her own education🤷‍♀️

A deadpan answer of "That's nice" works quite well, I find.

Oh yes the social media. She posts every pic of their achievements (including the actual test scores), every cake they made, oh and of course their school uniform every other week.

Ask her if she's planning a trip to Elevenerife once she's got over the Covid-20 she's invariably going to get.

In actual fact she struggled with her own education

There you go, that'll be why. She's proud and anxious that she can do that for her kids, but it could go away any moment.

"That's nice", just passing on, or social media blocks are your best bet.

God a private school posturer. The worst. I have a friend from school days who didn’t achieve at school because she is just not massively academic and preferred going out and messing about with lads than studying, and now her kids are at some prep school so she can say every chance she gets that she is giving her kids a chance because they are so bright like her and she doesn’t want them to be failed by the pathetic state system that failed her. Cue sympathetic nods and ‘wow you’re making such a huge sacrifice for them’ from onlookers. I just chuckle knowing that she wasn’t bloody failed by anything, she could be arsed and she knows it

In actual fact she struggled with her own education🤷‍♀️

Surely that explains her behaviour? She struggled herself but has managed to do a lot better for her kids. Just nod and smile, what does it hurt? Honestly some people are so mean spirited 🙄

I’m interested in this. I work with someone like this (she is actually lovely) but she talks about how amazing her son is ALL THE TIME. Tbh he does sound amazing but I’d like to get her to rein it in a bit.

Yes, @Chillicheese123, becoming involved in the boasting arms race of those people is a real risk. If only to stop the conversation becoming a one way street of them saying, “ME ME my kids’ achievements which I am vicariously living my life through” whilst you nod and smile and think, “how can you be so socially inept?”

It also entertains me when people live in a sought-after area and want to tell you about it constantly, in case you forget that they are the creme de la creme. Example: I worked with a bloke who lived in a ‘nice’ suburb of Manchester. Let’s call it Mayfair, to protect the guilty. Every day he would mention it, e.g.:

“The wind this morning was terrible in MAYFAIR,”

“You should have seen the traffic trying to get into MAYFAIR last night”

“You should do your running training in MAYFAIR, it’s really quiet and we have great pubs in MAYFAIR”

We used to take bets on how early in the day he would mention it.

@iamthewombat yes the temptation to counter-boast! I’m glad someone gets it.

Your friend, did he live in Didsbury ?

Did surly? I couldn’t possibly comment....

DIDSBURY, not did surly!!!!

It’s such a NAICE place to live.

I once had a friend who'd tell you she'd been to the shops IN THE AUDI

@Chillicheese123 yes exactly. She will try to get me to do the same thing back, only to make sure that she will win the game EVERY TIME🤣

Also, her kids aren't that great on their instrument, they can play notes but there's no beauty to their playing, they stand like sticks, terrible playing! Yet she posts their vids every other day😎

I have a former friend like this who would constantly boast and try to compete. I now spend minimal time around her- the reality of people like this is that they're incredibly insecure and the boasting is to compensate for feeling inadequate. Nobody genuinely happy in their own skin behaves like this.

@stormjensen you could try a different tack. Just race to the bottom. Say ridiculous things.

Her: ‘my daughter is so amazing, she’s in there now doing Advanced maths via Zoom, she’s honestly so clever, I can see her going to oxford in 10 years. sending her to Prepston Square Prep was the best thing we ever did.’
You: wow, incredible. My daughter is in there eating mud, she’s completely forgotten school exists and has even forgotten how to read! Her school, Normal Street Primary, is now staffed entirely by golden retrievers and she will only communicate by woofing’

It would baffle her so much she might shut up

I know a woman who is unbearable with boasting. We don’t even know each other that well but our kids are in the same class so every time I see her in passing within 2 mins she’s telling me about how amazing her “Emily” is. I had the opportunity to work for her but would have rather poked my eyes out with a stick. The saddest thing is that she also has another daughter who has Downs Syndrome and she has nothing to say about her.