I just want to grieve

[vickywire]

A good friend died.
I can't go to the funeral. None of my friends can. I miss him.
I cant just forget him, I just think it's so cruel now that he cant be remembered and celebrated for what he was. He deserves more, he had more than the handful of people over his grave.

I'm so sorry. It's awful

I'm so sorry my GM just passed away too and I can't attend the funeral. We are going to have a big memorial when this is all over and remember her properly. I'm hoping it'll be a lovely celebration of her life because the grief won't be quite so raw. Is this something you could do?

I'm also going to light a candle at the time of the funeral and hold my own 'private service' in the meantime

I couldn't attend my grandfather's funeral 2 weeks ago so I totally understand how horrible it is. We're going to have a big party in celebration of his life as soon as we are able, we've all considered the funeral as a formality rather than his actual funeral. Perhaps it would help you to see it this way and to maybe have your own small remembrance around the time of his funeral. I'm sorry for your loss

Oh OP, I’m so, so sorry for your loss. I think @fairydogmother11 has it right. But I know it doesn’t make it any less sad.

I agree with the others. I went to my mother in law's funeral 2 weeks ago. There were two of us there (my husband and me).

When this is all over we will have a big celebration of her life.

Your friend absolutely can be remembered and celebrated.

You might want to ask @MNHQ to move this to bereavement.

YANBU that sounds awful OP. I do hope you can truly celebrate him after all this is over.

So sorry for your loss.

Light a candle in memory, and allow yourself to grieve. Hope you can have a memorial when this is all over.

My mother-in-law law died just before lockdown. Her funeral was attended by me my husband and baby her other son dosnt live in the uk and couldn’t get home and obviously we needed to limit it. It was the most bizarre day it was like a what now after the funeral. No wake no story’s afterward. When we get the ashes back we are going to have a celebration of her life

I'm so sorry. Is the church or crem able to live stream the service by any chance? I know it isn't the same.

It is just all awful. My great uncle died last week and none of us can go to the funeral. His close family were told he had Covid and they couldn't go and say goodbye or be with him. Turns out he didn't have Covid after all when the tests came back. They are sending us a link to the live stream but I know my grandma is extremely distressed she can't attend in person.

I'm so sorry for your loss OP It's awful.

My Nana died 4 weeks ago and although I was able to go to her funeral, it wasn't what we would have planned under normal circumstances. We could only have 10 people and no wake.

We are planning to have something of a belated wake when we can but it's so difficult. I'm also finding that not going out to work is making it harder somehow. Like there's no return to any sort of normality

Take care and be kind to yourself.