To ask for your funny lockdown stories?

[Kitten9]

I live in an apartment building with quite a few elderly neighbours, so I’ve been doing my best to ensure that they have enough shopping during the lockdown. I managed to get a delivery slot from Tesco, so I called one elderly couple and asked them if they needed anything. ‘Well, where is it from?’ they asked. I replied Tesco and they said ‘Oh no, dear. We only shop at Waitrose!’ I told my DH and we were on the floor laughing.

Does anyone else have any funny lockdown-related stories for me to have a giggle at?

I'm sure me and my DH would've laughed too, but tbh it's quite rude

My ds2 lost his tooth at the beginning of the lockdown and he was slightly concerned the tooth fairy might not be able to travel to our house because of Covid and thought we might have to send the tooth to fairy land by post. It made me teary when he initially said it but me and DP chuckle about it now.

@readingismycardio I suppose it is, but they’re old so I cut them some slack! I have a LOT of stories about them

@Mustbethewine Oh, that’s so sweet! I would have teared up too but it also made me chuckle.

I was attending a high level EC zoom webinar with presentations been given by 4 distinguished speakers. In the middle of one of the presentations the service was interrupted by a hard core niche porn movie. The expressions on their faces were priceless. Luckily for me all the videos and sound on the delegates side had been muted as I was pissing myself laughing and let's put it this way it wasn't nutella that she was smearing all over his body.

Bumping as this looks like it could be funny.

thanks for the few laughs cheered my day up.

Son's Scout group was doing a Zoom meeting and they were playing some kind of online game where they had to do a drawing and other had to say what it is, or I think they could also have a pre-drawn picture appear gradually and then have clues as to what it is.... I watched as it became apparent the picture appearing that some kid had chosen (not DS!) was a leering cartoon willy and a name started appearing above it (which also worried me slightly) - turned out it was apparently 'John Cena'. Fortunately my son just thought it was a 'doggie'

Getting a 3kg bag of dried pasta for a woman who was in isolation with her sons...5 adults in one home and her calling me to basically complain.

She needed pasta but 3kg was too much and she was shocked at the size of the bag and I might have to come and collect it and take it away.

I explained the bag was resealable.

She said she couldn’t possibly do that, it was unhygienic and would I do that in my own home?!

It would appear that she throws out any unused dried pasta every time she has a meal and she only buys them in the exact quantity she needs per meal.

She’d also asked for 4 small tins of peas which were out of stock and to do just one meal. So I got her the exact same quantity that she needed but just in one tin...and she complained about that too. So she’d ordered 4 x 200g tins of peas and I got her 1 x 800g tin, knowing it was for 6 adults eating one particular meal. She kept saying, “they’ve sent a MASSIVE tin instead of 4 small ones. You’ll have to take it back.”

I’ll add she wasn’t paying for any of this.

My DP said he didn’t want to use a basket for shopping due to potential CV.
Fair enough, although over the top, I think. He soon had more items than he could carry so put the chicken and olive oil on the floor of the shop, pushing them along with his foot! I pointed out, laughing, how ridiculous his logic was (due to the filth that was likely on the floor) and he sheepishly agreed we should get a basket.
The lady in front of us in the queue was quietly giggling!

F

These are great! I'm so tired and blurred by lockdown alone that I accidentally put sugar on my chicken today instead of into the pasta sauce I was making at the same time. It all ended up in the same pot but did make me laugh!

I was eating lunch while on a video conference for work (with sound and video muted) as I was in back to back calls over lunchtime. Got a private message telling me to put my audio on mute, it seems I hadn't muted it after all and I was eating a really crunchy salad! 😂

Absolutely loving these stories

Doing an online shop for an elderly relative who emailed specific requests, bananas must be green, milk has to be particular organic brand, nuts must be organic and no almonds in the mix and remember I don't want any of that durux stuff that X (their neighbour) got me last time. We have no idea what X bought

A few weeks ago DH set up his desk in our downstairs hallway.
A very poorly timed shower from me, I ran downstairs starkers to get my clothes from the dryer....he was on a video lecture so I was pulled into a false sense of security from his quietness and headphones and they could see him I proper legged it up the stairs.

@mustbethewine

I had to help make a flipping house for our tooth fairy (we have one for each child) so she can move in on the doorstep and be part of the same household. I wouldn't mind but dd doesn't even have a wobbly tooth!!

I was In the kitchen, sorting dinner. DD and 3 year old DS were playing in the l lounge. I go back in to check on them and DS is starters from the waist down. He's opened the window even further, standing on the windowsill, casually having a wee out the window, much to the distress of my dog walking neighbor. I didn't know whether to feel mortified or burst into laughter.

My 20 yo DD said to last night when the Tyrrells crisps advert came on (if you see it, you'll understand)...
DD "Dad i used to think colour was invented"
Me "What?"
DD "when i was young i thought everything: clothes, flowers, grass, trees, the sky, used to be in black and white because i remember seeing B&W TV programmes and thought colour was invented later on, i used to sit in my car seat looking around thinking that i would like to invent a colour!"

We were both rolling around the floor laughing until it hurt! it was so funny! well, for us it was!