Ex and his gf

[anon0704]

AIBU?

My ex and his gf do not live together, but he's adamant she's coming to stay with him for a week in May. She works for a grocery store. Our son has a heart condition so he's classed as vulnerable through all this BS. Ex has basically told me to go talk to gf and say I'm not happy, but I'm pretty damned sure it's his job to make sure he's doing things to protect our son. I feel like he's chosen her over our boy.

Am I being unreasonable to say our son cannot be there while his gf is "visiting" and for at least a week after to make sure she hasn't brought along any symptoms and passed them on?

Do not speak to his GF. But if she visits then yes definetly keep your son away.

He told you to speak to his girlfriend? That's really weird! TBH I'd say he can't see your son until a week after the girlfriend leaves, just in case he starts displaying symptoms.

No plans to speak to gf. As far as I'm concerned, she knows our boy has a heart condition and she's just as guilty as the ex.

I’d keep your son away in this scenario. I’m trying to prevent my children catching it and they have no underlying health problems other than youngest ones ADHD and ASD. Can’t imagine the stress of trying to prevent your child getting ill if they have a heart condition or something.

Yadnbu
He on the other hand is being a massive twat. Gf is almost as bad as the ex but as it's not her child can't be held to the same standards as him

Icing on the cake: this is my fault I'm "keeping" our son from him. Good god.

Nope if he can’t follow the rules he doesn’t get to see his son.

It’s his decision not yours, don’t let him make you feel guilty!

Should you risk your son’s life so your ex can spend time with his new girlfriend?......tough one but I’m going to say no.

No please don’t talk to his gf. This is your ex’s responsibility and you need to have these conversations with him.

If he won’t budge then you’re just going to have to keep your son away. No other choice. If your ex doesn’t like it then just explain that your son’s health is more important than contact going ahead.

Say you're not sure if it's legal or not so will ring the police to check.

@Chestnut OMG so tempted.

What a selfish, immature prick. I can see why he’s your ex! You’re quite right to keep your DS away.

Also...

Say you're not sure if it's legal or not so will ring the police to check.

I totally second this!

I’d be saying 14 days after she’s left, the advice for families where someone has symptoms is that others living in the house have to isolate for 14 days, as it can take that long before symptoms start.

Your ex is vile for putting your DC in harms way. One of our neighbours lives alone with her DC and has her boyfriend visit 3-4 times a week (he doesn’t live there), thereby breaking the law and putting her DC in danger. It’s fucking neglect is what it is. I’d be furious OP and would definitely stop it.

Don't do the legal, thing. It is legal, so if he checked and told you that it would be harder to refuse. I think it should be presented to him that he is choosing gf over DS as he cannot go if she does. Its his job to tell her or not that she can come. If she dies, YANBU to keep your son safe

I told him he was putting her before our son and he said no I was keeping our son from him.

Keep your child away absolutely.

You need to take parental responsibility as he won't. His gf has nothing to do with your son so you have no reason to talk to her.

Keep your son away from him for 7 days after his gf leaves if he lives on his own, and 14 days if he lives with other people.

Tell him on the day he says his gf has left in writing.

You don't have to do anything else

Tell him to take any issues up with Boris you didnt make the guidelines