To TTC now?

[helia]

I would like another baby. My first child is nearly 4 and we've been on the fence about having another one since he was born. Earlier this year we decided to TTC in June as it would allow me to conclude some key projects at work. Those projects have gone out of the window now with the coronavirus outbreak. I think it would be wildly irresponsible to TTC now but if not now, when? When will it be OK? I don't want to add another burden on the NHS so does that mean waiting 2 more years? If you wanted another baby would you TTC now?

WIBU to TTC now?
Yes - YABU

I have voted YABU but in all honesty, I’m not sure there’s a right answer to your question. I wouldn’t personally TTC just now because it would put me at an increased risk of complications and I’ve got existing children who need their mummy. On the other hand, like you say “if not now, when?” I don’t have an answer for that. I’d probably hold off a couple of months and see how things progress first.

I think so. How would you feel about potentially going to all the doctor appointments on your own? Going to the scan on your own? also this is a time of recessions and huge economic uncertainty. We are in the same boat about having wanted to try come july but that has been put in hold till next year now.

I wouldn't..Everything is just too uncertain right now, it just seems a sad time to bring a baby into our world right now.

Personally I wouldn’t, I’m pregnant and honestly it sucks! Every appointment is alone, wearing masks and being scared. I haven’t been able to share my pregnancy with my family in the way I’d like and I could possibly end up giving birth alone if it gets worse! However, you are not being unreasonable for wanting to try.. it’s your life and your baby OP, you won’t be the only person to get pregnant now I’m sure!

I wouldn't at the moment, but cant answer the answer of when.
I wouldn't like going to scans on my own, appointments on my own etc.
Realistically we don't know how long this will go on and how long these measures will be in place.
The economic uncertainty scares me too, will your financial position change, will your job be affected.
I know that you can never plan the perfect time for a baby but right now I wouldn't even consider it.

I wouldn't, I'm heavily pregnant and it's terrifying.

DH are putting it off. Our jobs at the moment are safe but who knows how long this will last. I had to go into hospital early pregnancy last time so I don't want to add to the NHS burden because even though (hopefully) this will be over in 9 months there's still a chance of things going wrong and needing hospital care. From a selfish point of view I don't want to risk catching the virus and bringing it home so I'm going to use this time to get myself healthy and fit ready for TTC.

However, I am the wrong side of 30 but hopefully putting it off a year won't make much difference. (I'm not sure where you get putting it off for 2 years from - maybe this is something I'm not aware of).

Did you have trouble TTC? You don't say how old you are. There are so many factors which would make me say go for it or wait.

This is such a tough one. Can I ask how old you are? I ask, as for me that would massively influence my response.

In these uncertain times, from what I hear, Pre natal care isn’t what it is was. Aside from scans at the minute, all appointments are being done on the phone which really isn’t ideal for spotting gestational diabetes, pre eclampsia, correct growth etc. I really don’t think now would be a good time to be pregnant. There is already so much strain on the nhs and there are so many unknowns about the effect of the virus in an unborn baby.

Having said that, it is impossible to know exactly how long this will last. Ideally, you’re probably better off waiting until the start of next year. However, if you worry that you won’t be able to get pregnant for any reason and leaving it could mean you won’t have a baby, I would probably start trying now. It’s such a tough decision. Good luck, Op.

We were about to start TTC before this all started as our daughter is nearly 18 months old. We've taken the difficult decision to not do so at present, even though it means our chances of having number 2 (already fairly slim as I'm nearly 42) become even smaller. In the end it came down to worrying about our existing child potentially losing a parent in the worst case scenario if I needed hospital treatment and either couldn't get it, or became infected whilst receiving care. We dearly want a second child, but our immediate responsibility is to the gorgeous little girl we already have.

I wouldn't now, my friend is pregnant and can't see midwife, appointments are running weeks late, it's all a bit of a worry. We don't know what the situation will be in 9 months so I would wait till there's signs of covid being managed

The baby wouldn't be born tomorrow - you've got at least 9months and that's even assuming you get pregnant from the off. All things being equal there is never a right time... in 9 months time things will look very different.

No-one who thinks about it logically would ever have a kid if they weighed up the pros and cons.

Corona doesn't seem to be affecting pregnant women and their unborn babies more than anyone else so if you want a kid get cracking.

Very similar situation for us. We had literally decided that last months pills would be my last and then this all happened so we're waiting. However I am the wrong side of 35, so not sure long we will want to wait. I also didn't have the best pregnancy with our first (also nearly 4)and I had to be scanned every 2 weeks. Not sure how I would feel going through something like that again during these times .

Yanbu...
We have hummed and harred over this one, but ultimately we want another baby, and to get on with our lives, we want to relocate after this baby and we Dont want to put that off.
But we've decided to try for baby number 2 now, we have an 18 month old.
Like PP said, baby isn't going to be born tomorrow, its a 9 month pregnancy, and id really hope by then that things will have settled down a hell of a lot!!
We don't want to put our life on hold.
Good luck!

Thanks everyone. I started two threads by mistake so a quick apology about that.

I'm 31 and conceived my first child within a few months so I have no reason to suspect a long and difficult road ahead for baby no. 2 (but you never know). I feel we have the luxury of waiting another six or twelve months. I think we will wait and re-assess again in three months.

So I guess that means you'll just be practising for the foreseeable future!

It's entirely up to you!
I am 25 weeks and I am really glad to be pregnant. Ok, it's not the greatest timing but it's fine.
My appointments are still going ahead. If you decided to do it now then at least you'd know about having to go to scans alone etc
I'd rather take my chances than risk not having another child.

It’s up to you. But I personally wouldn’t as wouldn’t want the extra stress and also nobody is sure how it can effect the baby in the early weeks yet. Maybe absolutely fine but they are my concerns.

As others have said, depends how old you are. I’m cracking on because I’m nearly 36, with one 17 month old who was a low risk utterly ordinary pregnancy and delivery, secure job and I’m okay with going to scans alone and am going to self isolate for 3+ months once I get those two little lines. If I was 33-34 and no other fertility concerns, I’d wait.

I'm in early pregnancy just now and it's scary. I have a history of miscarriages and really should have had scans by now but they don't want to and I'm not happy about going into hospitals. Also homeschooling with morning sickness is so difficult