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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should families with kids get priority in supermarket queue?

141 replies

GreyGardens88 · 12/04/2020 09:05

So I was going to Lidl yesterday afternoon for some essentials, there was a massive queue stretching nearly out of the shopping centre. I took my place at the back and immediately a woman with family and kids in tow came walking down shouting about how selfish everyone in the queue is for not letting in at the front due to them having kids. Would not stop shouting about it and I think her DH was embarrassed. Whole family was there, the grandparents, the parents and the kids.

Everyone else in the queue stayed silent but in the end an older gentleman let them in towards the front and he went to the back.

IABU in not letting them in myself? Would you expect to have priority if you have kids?

OP posts:
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 12/04/2020 09:18

I had to take my DC with me a couple of weeks ago (DH had a day off this week so went alone). Most children are perfectly capable of standing in a line for a bit.

Having had to take DC, I can't understand why people would take them voluntarily at the moment. They had awareness to keep away from people, but not awareness of what people wanted to do (standing to the side of an aisle so people can pass by the otherside for example)

emilybrontescorsett · 12/04/2020 09:18

No and where I live only one person is allowed in.

speakout · 12/04/2020 09:20

No- it would encourage people to take their children to supermarkets to get to the front of the queue.

BubblesBuddy · 12/04/2020 09:20

No. No priority. I know it’s difficult for single parents right now. However queues vary in length according to time of day. No whole families should be allowed in anyway. Far more effective to let one adult do the shopping. That’s what most are doing if they can.

errorofjudgement · 12/04/2020 09:22

I can’t believe you all stood there and let an older man give up his place to the entitled woman and watched him move to the end of the queue and none of you said anything.

What’s that saying about for evil to flourish (in this case selfish entitled behaviour) all it needs is for good men to do nothing.

hopeishere · 12/04/2020 09:25

Kids should not have been there.

While close families are great there does seem to be a group of people who literally cannot function outside of that's family unit. One of my friends is "on lockdown" but still seeing her parents Hmm she is a grown woman but actually can't seem to function without parental input.

Dyrne · 12/04/2020 09:34

hopeishere it’s difficult reading about selfish people flouting the guidelines, isn’t it?

I would love nothing more than to give my Granny a big hug, take her out for a bit, and make sure she’s got enough shopping in.

As it is I’ve had to make do with phone calls and obsessive refreshing of the supermarket apps so that I can arrange online delivery.

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 12/04/2020 09:34

Sorry OP I voted YABU instead of the intended YANBU

KatherineJaneway · 12/04/2020 09:36

No they should not. As pp have said, kids should not even be there.

Anyway, this woman was highly dense not to realise that on a Saturday afternoon before Easter the supermarkets would be rammed.

reluctantbrit · 12/04/2020 09:45

There shouldn't be a need for taking children if there is another adult at home, single parents or a parent working outside home is obviously difficult to shop without them but then they need to time the shopping that they can be in as soon as the shops open for normal people.

I queued yesterday and there was a heavily pregnant lady in the queue. Nobody said anything when a staff member led her out and move her to the front of the queue. She acutually looked embarrassed for the priority treatment but that is the kind of circumstances you need exceptions for, not a loud mouthed person.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 12/04/2020 09:48

Security should have sorted them out. Preferably someone really hefty with a pit bull/bouncer look about them.

Unfortunately there will always be a few like this.

I see the odd one locally who’s apparently deliberately flouting the rules, and almost wanting someone to say something, so they can start a row. Some people seem to get their pathetic kicks like that.

SeasonallySnowyPeasant · 12/04/2020 09:49

Um, what? One adult should have stayed to queue and the rest of them should have taken the children home. There’s no need for entire family groups to go shopping, let alone be encouraged in their stupidity by being given any sort of priority.

Staff should be able to use their discretion. If there’s a single parent with a child having a meltdown in a very long queue then that’s a situation where shuffling them to the front is merited.

OmgThereAreNoPlanesAboveMeNow · 12/04/2020 09:51

@WhentheRabbitsWentWild you can change your vote.

Ariela · 12/04/2020 09:57

No, not a priority. Can understand if SEN /single parent and there is no option but to take the child otherwise they should be left at home.
Also shopping for a 94 year old an 87 year old and 2 homes with vulnerable + my own doesn't allow me priority in the supermarket queue. They're not long anyway, not that there is much else to do so why not queue .

Original poster
GreyGardens88 · 12/04/2020 09:59

She was looking around at everyone to see if anyone was irritated/ to see who she could have a row with. I just didn't fancy an argument and I knew thats all she was looking for so stayed silent

OP posts:
AnnaMagnani · 12/04/2020 10:00

No because if the whole family was there, she had childcare to keep the kids at home. Only one person should be doing the shop. Security should have sent the rest away back to the car.

Only exception should be single parents.

Port1aCastis · 12/04/2020 10:00

Jesus the selfish entitlement of some is eye watering, no why should the woman barge in because she has kids and why were her kids there, she should just wait her turn like everyone else as doesn't seem like she was as special as she thinks. Breeding does not make anyone a feckin heroine so no princess rules are applicable here !

Ginfordinner · 12/04/2020 10:00

Would not stop shouting about it and I think her DH was embarrassed. Whole family was there, the grandparents, the parents and the kids.

Our supermarkets would have challenged her and only allowed one of them into the shop. I shopped at Lidl on Thursday and it was very civilised. They had a doorman allowing one out and one in. I went round the corner to pick up some compost when I got to the front of the queue then went into the shop. Someone shouted out that I had jumped the queue, but the doorman told them that I hadn't.

I don't understand why some families think that shopping is a family day out. They are the reason we keep having the stay at home reminders on our TVs.

Did the security guard let them all in?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 12/04/2020 10:00

Did you get what you wanted, OP? Nasty comments about breeding from a knuckledragger?

If nobody had given up their place then this person would have had to return to the back. As it was, as annoying as this thing in principle is, nobody but the man who gave up his place would have been inconvenienced.

pussycatinboots · 12/04/2020 10:06

No, nope, never on this earth.
If some Cheeky Fucker tried this on with me and wanted to be nearer the front of the queue, I'd suggest she/he/they get up earlier.

Rosebel · 12/04/2020 10:08

I feel sorry for the man who let them in. Where live security would refuse entry to her and wouldn't have allowed the whole family in. It's okay to take your child if there is no other choice but she clearly did have a choice.
Unfortunately having got away with it she'll just carry on unless they introduce a rule such as 1 adult per household. Tbh, when there is another option I don't understand people take their children to the supermarkets anyway (let alone during a pandemic).

Rubychard · 12/04/2020 10:12

I think @speakout is probably correct. If children were made a priority people would take them in order to jump the queue. Theres enough stupid people out there.

TotesGodsWill · 12/04/2020 10:15

Of course SWBU she or her DH should’ve stayed home with the kids rather than shopping as a family. I’ve never understood family outings to the supermarket at the best of times but especially not now!

Livelovebehappy · 12/04/2020 10:18

There’s now more people vying for priority ‘everything’ that soon the priority queue will be far longer than the normal queues. You really get an idea of how many selfish self entitled idiots we live amongst whist being in the middle of this crisis. And there are lots of them.

FlockofGulls · 12/04/2020 10:24

Whole family was there, the grandparents, the parents and the kids

The queue monitors should have sent all of them bar the woman, home. Clearly flouting any spirit of the physical dstancing & lockdown requirements.

And no, families with children should not automatically get priority. I live alone, in a marginally vulnerable group (but not officially vulnerable/shielding), and I have to eat! I have as much right in a queue as anyone else.

I like queues - they are the great democratic leveller - no-one has greater rights than anyone else.