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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask overseas folk what British quirks they think are weird/funny?

999 replies

Burntmybiscuits · 08/04/2020 13:00

Us Brits are always on our high horse, making light humour over the habits of other countries (particularly the U.S!), so I thought it would be funny to see what people overseas find 'unique' about us!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
Standrewsschool · 09/04/2020 22:29

April fools - you can only do practical jokes up to midday.

ladyhummingbee · 09/04/2020 22:36

@Standrewsschool
You must have misunderstood Grin. April fools is all of 1. April. They even do an April fools on the evening new on tv here.

ladyhummingbee · 09/04/2020 22:37

News someone stole the S Hmm

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 09/04/2020 22:44

No, it's till midday. There's even a rhyme for people who try to play pranks after midday: "April's fool is dead and gone, you're the fool and I am none!"

Cassandrainthenight · 09/04/2020 22:51

I know everyone is sick to the back of the teeth with two taps thing, and there's been plenty of explanation why it was like that originally (though we have a water tank in the loft and hot water tank near the boiler AND mixer taps), but why do newbilds still have them installed right, left and centre, and everywhere still sells sinks with two holes for two taps 🤔
I don't know anyone under 30 who doesn't hate two taps (esp the ones which are mega short under which you can't even wash your hands because they are only designed to fill the sink, not for free flowing water to be used), but loads of rentals have them.

Actually when we were looking to buy our last house I told DH(British English) that if more than one sink has no mixer taps in pictures I refuse to even view the property because it must mean the owners are clueless and there would be numerous other things wrong with the house.

To the pp who said they need to be absolutely sure the water will be coming out cold, for instance, just get a traditional tap with a cold and hot knob on each side. Though I much prefer the ones where you lift the top to run it because can be used one-handed/one-fingered.

Lots of other things have been mentioned though I'm not frustrated with majority of the issues having lived here for over 15 years. Very frustrated with the quality of housebuilding throughout though, having lived in different period houses for now 17th century with massive thick walls and a 50s ex council house turned out to be the warmest, least damp, no condensation/mould and the most adequately ventilated houses...

When I first arrived NHS was one of the biggest shocks, that you can't self refer to a specialist, can't see the doctor same day, that there are no GP home visits even for kids with fever (couldn't drive here at first and wondered how I was supposed to deliver a sick child to the surgery) and the fact that British dentistry still uses mercury fillings without batting an eyelid (and coyly calls them "silver" fillings). I don't think even the poorest African countries use mercury fillings.

But I LOVE this country ❤️. It's kind of understandable that puzzling things are more often than not would be negative things. As a natural owl the fact that everything closes so, so early I still find hard...

OmgThereAreNoPlanesAboveMeNow · 09/04/2020 22:59

I don't think even the poorest African countries use mercury fillings.
Is that amalgam filling? Because if yes than it's certainly not just "the poorest African countries" and NHS using itConfused

sst1234 · 09/04/2020 23:11

Having so much love for your dog that you pick up it’s shit with your hand. That beyond gross, even with a poop bag around your hand. Sorry but even doing that for your child would be disgusting, let alone a dog. Letting your dog do that and not picking it up is even worse, of course.

mous · 09/04/2020 23:18

@ladyhummingbee

i want to hear all about your home renovations

Ideally please start at the beginning, when you first got your house, or thought about a house, so I can sneak this very large bit of cake with a flag in it over to my plate (but not the last slice, obviously, the Danes trained me far too well for that).

Bonus points for any specific address of the following:

a) how many candles make a hygge? Please show your working out. (3 marks)

b) if a British person manages to say 'rodgrod med flode' without falling over, how many Danish pig farmers would you be able to see flying past your fashionably large window? (3 marks)

c) What is your favourite colour scheme for interior design, and why is it white and grey? (2 marks)

d) if you have a summer home, or already have one, how many renovations will it take before you finish renovating your summer home, thus necessitating selling your summer home and buying a new summer home so you can start renovating again? (3 marks - exponential function on calculator permitted).

(love you guys, I make a socially distant mwah in your direction ❤️)

Enko · 09/04/2020 23:24

@ArthurDentsSpaceTowel
You've clearly never had the pleasure of a really good, strong, crumbly Cheddar with slightly crystalline bits in it,

Oh I have I worked for a cheese shop for a few years and I am a proper cheese fan.. With a proper cheese slicer (not the crumbly weird ones you can at times find here in the UK) You can slice nicely...

ladyhummingbee · 10/04/2020 00:17

@mous
Much too late in the evening for such an extensive questionnaire 🤣🤣.

But you are not entirely wrong, our house has massive panoramic windows, so does our summer home and you will be surprised to know that our colour scheme is... Gray/white and blue.
Our summer home has been renovated recently and we are not thinking of buying a new project, thank you 🤣.

Hold down the O to get to the Ø as in rødgrød med fløde (which I don't even find funny).

Mwah back at you 😀.

midlifecrash · 10/04/2020 00:45

I had the best chip butty in Rouen, where it was called a sandwich Belge - frites in a baguette with mayonnaise.

I always wondered if they were eaten in Belgium, or whether it was just that they were eaten in Northern France but they preferred to blame the Belgians.

StilettoToTheHeart · 10/04/2020 00:53

Why are there are so many professional & social occasions to discuss the weather ... in a full on debate about forecasts for the weekend?

We all have the same apps - we are not all meteorologists, but we actually smile and nod and discuss each other’s weather interpretations, as though we are giving points for accuracy. Why?

Cassandrainthenight · 10/04/2020 01:20

@OmgThereAreNoPlanesAboveMeNow,

Yes, amalgalm - I'm pretty sure nowadays they are only used in some parts of former British empire (for some economical/cultural reasons probably) and they are banned or fell out of use nearly everewhere else.

My dentist lived in Africa in her youth(not SA) and said some dentistry was ahead of what she was taught as a dental student later in UK.
I know someone from Afghanistan who didn't get what amalgam fillings were.

Pretty sure in some European countries (possibly Scandinavian) you get compensation from the government if you ever in the past had a mercury filling because they are linked to so many disorders it's considered automatic you'd have some ill effect on your health.

Nearly all British dentists are taught that they are "safe". But my DH got chronic tinnitus after getting one a few years ago (the dentist didn't even inform him that he was putting it in or offered any alternative because it was a back tooth on the NHS)

I grilled a dentist who was offering an amalgam filling for my teenage son, whether he'd put a filling like that in his own or his child's mouth. He wouldn't commit to an answer, said he'd never need to choose because had enough mates who'd put a composite filling in for free if there ever was a problem with funds...

Graphista · 10/04/2020 01:22

Op I agree languages education in Uk is appalling. I learnt french at school (very poorly) but after leaving school a combination of genuine interest in and travel overseas meant I made the effort to learn other languages. I can speak 3 fairly well a further 2 I can get by and another 2 I can make laughable attempts at. But they’re all European I wouldn’t know where to begin with eg an Asian language!

@PhillipJennings the fish on Friday thing is a throwback to old catholic practice. Used to be catholic’s didn’t eat meat on Fridays as a way to commemorate Christ’s sacrifice on good Friday. Sunday roast also church based, would be cooking while the family was in church on Sunday morning and served when they got home which is lunchtime generally in Uk. Not sure about other countries.

On uk retail, not only stupid hours that aren’t useful to consumers but the customer service is TERRIBLE!

When I went to live overseas as an adult (I’d lived there as a small child too but don’t really remember it) I was blown away by the excellent customer service, from the way they let you know they welcomed you into a store without erring into hard sell, asking questions that showed a genuine interest, making the effort to get to know you as a regular customer and your preferred choices and information that affected choices, making whoever was with you feel welcome to what seemed extraordinary but actually very sound business choices like having TVs playing sport for boyfriends/husbands to watch near the changing rooms in women’s fashion shops (yes ok hardly feminist but practical and means the men aren’t rushing the women trying on clothes to get a move on meaning they spend more time trying stuff on and more likely to buy), coffee served to people accompanying those trying things on, lollipops & small toys given to kiddies, speedy & competent service in cafes and restaurants, which are happy to go off menu if possible or adjust a dish...

Here you’re lucky if you get a smile these days!

@verily1 that’s actually one of the schemes I was referring to, and your description is incorrect from my knowledge, there was a precinct of shops, pool, football pitch, community centre and medical centre incorporated into it and the flats had balconies! I’ve photos of myself & siblings and cousins playing on them!

On carpets I WISH my upstairs neighbours had carpets! Many of us in the Uk live in poorly insulated flats I can hear every step but in addition they have a small child they allow to run around daft in heavy boots ALL the time. He starts around 6.30 am every morning...and doesn’t stop until around 9pm!

How your name can identify your class try having a name that reads like an English name but is pronounced differently as you’re not English. Had so many English people try and tell me I’m pronouncing my own name wrongly.

On ID cards, as someone who was a forces dependent most of my life and had an ID card then I too don’t understand the resistance. Was so much easier when I had one - and it was free! I’d love a free/cheap photo ID card that fit in my purse (I don’t drive currently and I rarely travel outside Uk due to finances)

Weenurse · 10/04/2020 03:20

I grew up rural Australia, so everyone drives. Nearest town with takeaway and drive in was 30 minutes away.
I don’t understand the number of people who don’t drive in UK.
Having said that, I don’t think I would have a car if I lived in Sydney.

LoveIsLovely · 10/04/2020 03:42

@steppemum oh yes, the fake niceness, why on earth do we do that? I've definitely got in trouble with that with other nationalities in the past.

Has it also been mentioned how long it takes us to get off the phone? "Bye then, take care, speak to you soon, give my love to so and so, bye, bye, bye, byeeeeee."

I've had so many Europeans tell me how odd it is.

My husband is East Asian and they literally just either go "mmm" or literally say "I'm hanging up now". The first time my husband said that to my mum, she was most taken aback. Can you imagine? "OK, see you on Sunday then." "Yes, I'm hanging up now."
Lol.

mortforya · 10/04/2020 03:49

Jeremy Kyle😳, why does anyone in the UK even contemplate going on this show, seriousily why, it never ever shows them in a good light, its desperate to watch

mortforya · 10/04/2020 03:52

Oh and the very strange surnames of the British, windass and glasscock spring to mind, how come there are so many silly sounding surnames

mortforya · 10/04/2020 03:57

Last one, when on holidays we always know the British as they will have a pint of lager in front of them with breakfast, how can anyone want alcohol at breakfast is mind-boggling

daisypond · 10/04/2020 04:22

@mortforya
The Jeremy Kyle Show doesn’t exist any more.

IHaveBrilloHair · 10/04/2020 04:33

@Weenurse
I lived in rural Australia fir a while, and what you say about driving is true, however the fact that it was quite normal to drink j and drive was scary.
It was 20 years ago si may be different now.

habibihabibi · 10/04/2020 04:54

how can anyone want alcohol at breakfast is mind-boggling
I posted similar upthread but nobody challenged it.
It always amazes me to see Brits, mostly men, drinking in the departure lounges before very early am flights and drinking heavily on the said flights. Then spending all holiday drinking.
Why ?

mathanxiety · 10/04/2020 05:00

Irish, in the US -
British funerals are very different from anything I have ever experienced either in Ireland or the US.
Insanely early bedtimes for children.
Parents stay for parties of young children.
Extreme caution about hiring teenage babysitters.
The very negative attitude to teenagers.
School uniforms, school shoes, school bags, no lockers in schools.
Lack of built in closets in houses - a bedroom only qualifies as a bedroom here if it has a built in closet.
Carpet.
sorry for this one... but terrible taste in interiors/home décor. it is either an odd mix of yellow walls, wooden furniture and awful carpet. or if someone is trying to make an effort there seems to always be an accent wall somewhere with a patterned wallpaper and add something in crushed velvet. YY to that, Scandiinlondon

Iflyaway · 10/04/2020 05:57

Great thread.

the type of place where you can have breakfast while reading the paper, go for coffee & cake at 11, have a light lunch with a glass of wine on the side, or a snack & beer after work, and somehow does all those things reasonably well.

In most of them you can even stay for dinner!

Iflyaway · 10/04/2020 06:00

On ID cards, as someone who was a forces dependent most of my life and had an ID card then I too don’t understand the resistance. Was so much easier when I had one - and it was free!

Ours isn't free but it also serves as a passport in the EU, even in countries like Morocco and Turkey, all of Scandinavia, Switzerland etc.
Brilliant!