To think that obesity mostly has to do with your genes

[penandpaperlife]

I've been living with my best friend for a year now due to some personal issues with my STBXH, and this has been something I've been wondering about. My best friend eats the exact same thing as me, with the same exact portion size. She also snacks on nuts and/or biscuits throughout the day (we're a freelance team so we spend basically all day together) while I don't.

Why then, is she slim and I'm not?

The only difference in our lifestyle is that she goes for a 15min run every morning. I've read studies and charts though and that seems to only burn about 150kcals. Surely that wouldn't even offset her snacks? I come from a 'fat family', she doesn't. We're both almost 30, if that matters. That leads me to believe that genetics do play a huge part here, contrary to what's often being parroted in the press. Is that possible? Does anyone have any experience with this?

I do think that people with better genes for weight management and better life circumstances can be horrendously smug against those who have the deck stacked against them.

This is true, some people go beyond smug and are just plain nasty

@velocitygirl7 If it's genetic, how do you explain the fact that there are far more obese people than even 20 years ago?

Mostly it is just if you eat more calories than you need you will put on weight (and I would like to lose a stone myself so am certainly not holier than thou about all this - it is very hard for people to eat less).

If people are locked away in captivity and not fed much just about all of them lose weight whether they have big bones, bad genetics or anything else which does seem to prove that it is about the number of calories you take in over those you expend.

I don't think so.
When I was younger right up until I had my dd I was underweight. En I had dd I piled on the pounds and had never ever struggled with my weight before but also never dieted or set foot in a gym or any other formal exercise. My mums is very underweight and my dad over weight. No one else in my family out of my siblings are close to overweight.
I even went to the doctor as after 7 months I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me.
The doctor kindly told me I'm just fat nothing wrong with me (after test results came back)
And I realised I'm not walking as fast as I used to.
I'm a late person and I used to walk very fast to everything after being too disorganised to get my act together.

When I had dd I was at home most of the day. Eating mainly the same amount of food but the weight piled on until I was over weight. Everyone that knew me thought it was a bit shocking only found this out once I lost the weight
Since dd though I've never gone back to the same old me as I just am not in a position to move around a lot anymore.

To the outside world it appeared I could eat what I wanted and never get fat before I had dd and even I thought this but it was simply me moving around a lot more. Also I fidget a lot when sitting down and apparently that helps you stay slim as well.
I do think that if your parents raise you to sit about and not walk anywhere, eat badly and pretend you're not overweight when you're younger that has an effect on you for life though. It's hard to shift old lifestyle patterns.

I think the reason the Blood Sugar Diet works is that it’s one of the few diet books that are brave enough to say “ stop eating”.

Most of the others have unlimited food, or staying full. It won’t hurt to be hungry for a few hours if you know you have a meal coming.

To some/a great extent, all disease is genetic, either the human or their biome.

We first went to the US about 1985, to Florida. The thing that amazed us most was the huge numbers of very fat people. Especially the kids. You did not see this anywhere else at that time.

There have always been a few overweight people but nothing like the extent we see now. Since our Florida trip the world has followed the US with their terrible diet. Takeaways, high sugar/fat food in supermarkets, vast bottles of Coke etc. Corn syrup make from sweet corn is a sweetener used a lot in cheap food and has been identified as especially bad.

Hopefully after the pandemic people will have been weaned off takeaways and learnt to cook.

We know some body types gain weight easier than others, don't we? Ectomorphs, endomorphs and mesomorphs.

I do gain weight if I overeat and stop exercising but I've never been massively overweight, and it's come off easily once I started trying to lose it. Whereas I know very fit people, who cycle or swim miles daily, seem to eat a reasonable diet, and are very overweight. Of course it's possible they're binging when I'm not around - but if not it seems very unfair!

@leckford in my area far from being weaned off takeaways the delivery waiting times by us have tripled in the last few weeks. I think we'll have more obese people after lockdown than less.

I got myself a small cheap treadmill years ago and being in a flat now this is the only thing that will stave off the pounds. Boredom eating is definitely occurring atm!

I do think genes play a part - my husband is medically underweight. He eats loads, way more than me and no matter what he does he's always at least 9lbs under the minimum weight for his his height, if not more. Thyroid has been tested, Marfan's has been ruled out, he's got plenty of energy etc. - he's just naturally slim.

His immediate family are similar - they're all very slim.

Sadly mine are the opposite and I'm one of the slimmest in my family. My BMI hovers around 24.8 and I can tip into a BMI of 25 very easily. I have to be very careful about what I eat, whereas DH can eat whatever he wants and doesn't gain!

The genes come in with different calorie burning and fat depositing. It simply means that everyone's body is different so not one lifestyle fits all. It is calories in/calories out situation. However, one person will for example have to exercise 10 minute extra compare to another to achieve same results.
Like at school imo. Someone spends hour reading and gets As while their friend has to spend double the time reading to achieve the same grade.
So yes, genes can make it harder or easier but not impossible.

I second the people talking about fidgeting. All my slim friends just keep moving. Can't sit still for a while. All my non slim friends can and don't move that much. I am in the latter category and fully aware of that difference and that we really do often eat much more and move less than we think.

Your genes don’t help, but it’s ultimately what you choose to eat and what exercise you choose that really does the damage.

My husband is tall and lean. He struggles to put on weight. I’m the opposite. It’s not fair, but that’s the way it is. If I want to be slim I have to work on it. (I fail regularly)

Ii think there's a little of everything.

My anecdote is when I was pregnant, I suddenly wasn't eating as much. Not because I felt sick, just that I didn't feel any urge. I could eat one biscuit and put the pack away, I would actually forget to eat meals etc. This was a revelation. I didn't put on weight above baby and fluid when pregnant, and so I was pre-pregnancy weight 2 weeks after the babies were born.

All my life, I've basically only felt hunger/fullness once I was very hungry or very full. I can eat 1/2 a pack of biscuits no problem (which is why I don't have them in the house). This makes judging when I've eaten enough a labour-intensive process as I have to actually mentally count.

@BarbaraofSeville I remember all of them thought they ate so much and all of them were underrating compared to the regular guidelines. Only one of the women ate more than 2000 calories a day and Shen was the least slim of them if I remember rightly.

People who are skinny eat a lot less than they think they do.

@Xenia

If people are locked away in captivity and not fed much just about all of them lose weight whether they have big bones, bad genetics or anything else which does seem to prove that it is about the number of calories you take in over those you expend.

It riles me up though when posters (not you), present this information as if it's somehow proof that obese people are really just faking their need for calories/compulsion to eat/being lazy.

To me it's the opposite. If some people can only lose weight if they are locked up and starved, then it points to more being wrong with them, or that the way society functions is not conducive to living at a healthy weight.

Lockdown is actually great for my weight management.

• sleeping well (poor sleep strongly linked to weight gain)
• 1.5h back a day to cook and exercise
• much harder to access crap food
• not much of a snacker, so keeping calories to sensible, home made meals

Those things are only variably under my control most days.

Very few runners actually only run for 15 mins. I do a 5 min warm up and a 10 min stretch at the end. So that alone would be 15 mins.

Why would you even bother to get changed and go outside for less than 15 mins running? So she probably exercises for at least 30 mins.

So I suspect that the Op is underestimating the exercise that her flatmate does. Same as most overweight people underestimate how much food they eat and calories they drink.

" It won’t hurt to be hungry for a few hours if you know you have a meal coming."

Yes, I think this IS a modern switch in attitude. The 'keeps you fuller for longer' culture. When I was a child and most people were slim, it was entirely normal to feel hunger pangs stirring in the run-up to a meal. You didn't feel driven to satisfy it right here, right now.

Metabolism is based mostly on your genes.

But having a slow metabolism doesn’t mean you will inevitably become obese. You can decide to eat less to stay thin. It’s not fair or fun, especially if you hang out with high metabolism people, but it’s possible. I used to eat like a horse and have had to eat far less as I got older and my metabolism slowed right down, so as not to put on weight.

I think it is futile to try to pin down one specific factor: all it does is discourage you from making the changes you can change or considering that even if what your friend does doesn't seem to be making the whole difference for you maybe there is something else you could try.

I am a little interested in this as I have two different cultures to compare with and am also a historian so can see changes in time in both cultures.

Yes, there were people who were overweight in WW2: you have only got to look at photographs to see that. So that might suggest there is a genetic element.

But there are far, far more people who are overweight today, so that might suggest there should be some other factors to look at too.

Rationing might be one. People did not starve in WW2 but they ate less and above all, they consumed less sugar.

They also walked far more: public transport was limited and relatively few people were able to run private cars. Young people danced, which burns a lot of energy.

As for cross-cultural comparisons, my point of comparison is Sweden, where people are fatter than they were but still on the whole slimmer and in better shape than the UK average.

So yes, could be genetic. But then again, there is the evidence that UK has changed over time (so, to be fair, have the Swedes, just at a slower rate). So as their change has been slower, might they also be doing something slightly different?

Eating habits is the first thing that springs to mind. Yes, they eat a lot more junk than they did: there are fast food outlets on every high street and crisps are not only for parties. But they are not for everyday either. You only have to peep into a Swedish supermarket to realise that the crisps and snacks section takes up a fraction of the space it does in its British counterpart. People are eating less of the stuff, eating it less often. Things like crisps are for Friday night, not for children's lunchboxes. They also probably drink less. You do see a fair bit of drunkenness, like here, but again, alcohol is a bit of a luxury, not an everyday thing for ordinary families. I don't think wine o'clock is a thing. Children are expected to eat one of two or three healthy options at school lunch and that is it. Nobody (unless in cases of SN) brings in burgers instead because their child isn't used to eating vegetables. Families tend to eat together.

The other thing is exercise. Of course they are privileged there, having access to so much walking space and safe places for outdoor swimming. But they also use it in a different way: you don't see people driving out to the forest and just hanging around the car park. They are taught from very young that you have to spend active time outdoors every day, that not doing so is very bad for you in some vague, non-defined way. And they are encouraged to do so in all weathers. You still see elderly couples going out for walks arm in arm.

(This is a major reason why they are so shit at self-isolation: they really struggle to believe that their freedom to roam and practise their skiing and swim in the lake could be taken from them).

Parents tend to be more involved in children's exercise: children's after-school sports clubs etc are usually run by parents. They have an old-fashioned amateur attitude to life: not everything has to be done by experts. Our children had their first swimming lessons from a local swimming school (I think, a student who got engaged for a few weeks), but after that, we got together and taught them ourselves. Happy memories of my 78yo father precariously balancing a kitchen chair on a rock to achieve the appropriate height for his grandsons' diving test.

It’s not genes. It’s calories v use of calories.

My husband and I eat the same. I also eat lots of crap on top. He’s 12 stone something 6 foot man and I am 5 foot 2 and under 8 stone. Lockdown has shown that I don’t stop moving. I do 15-20k Steps a day outside exercise. I pace when working. I move at speed. I’m slightly enerve so walk/move/do things at double his speed. I’m constantly up and down around the kids, house work, work etc. He moves much more slowly, takes ages over tasks, will sit at his desk fir prolonged periods without really getting up.

That’s why I can take on more calories than him. I burn them off. He doesn’t.

I’d rather be a bit fatter and more relaxed mind you. His way is definitely the better way!

I don't know if there is a gene that can make your body process food more efficiently, but I think there are both genetic and learned factors that mean people can be predisposed to obesity through behaviour, lifestyle or physicality.

DH is tall and slim and comes from a tall, slim family. I am short and fat and my family tends towards that (not entirely). So I do consider our differences often. Of course we are only two people, but the things I have observed do (in my opinion) apply to others.

One example is the fidget factor that others have mentioned. DH and his family are always on the go, can't sit still. DH drumming his fingers drives me to distraction! My family are very much of the flop down variety. We don't fidget in the same way, don't feel the need to pop out. It would never occur to us to go for a walk unless it was to somewhere in particular. It is hard to know whether this is learned behaviour or because we don't have that genetic athleticism or instinct to keep moving.

Food-wise, I was always given a sort of comfort food for most meals - soft, hearty stuff like shepherd's pie, savoury suet puddings. Stuff my mum learnt to make at school. I hate the taste of anything bitter like coffee and had always refused cheesy or other savoury flavours even from weaning. Do some people have genetically different taste buds or is it all learned?

On school trips my packed lunches would be epic and I would still be eating when others had finished. So probably that's mostly learned behaviour as I was used to feeling full and to having sweet or bland tastes. DH's family will make a packed lunch to take to the seaside and it will be a sandwich each, an apple and some water. An ice cream is a rare treat. Whereas for my family, a packed lunch is always a full picnic with lots of little extras, an ice cream is mandatory.

The other thing is fluid. I rarely feel thirsty and often forget to drink at all unless reminded. I eat a lot of fruit and that seems to keep thirst at bay.

From time to time I've lost weight so I know it is possible but I'm currently at my heaviest and doing all the worst things despite my fears about cv. Self discipline and good mental health are also factors in remaining slim. But why do some people find this achievable and others don't? What is going on psychologically and is it learned or genetic? If it's personality, how much of that was I born with?

I now have a DS who is physically like his father and seems to naturally moderate his own eating. DD is far more inclined to ask for treats (but as she's younger it could be due to seeing her big brother eating them) and less interested in savoury. I will do everything I can to make sure she doesn't end up like me. But I know, ultimately, the most effective thing I can do is model healthy eating and a healthy weight. I am going to try and do that.

So my conclusion is that yes, being a healthy weight is scientifically calories-in v calories-out. But the factors that cause those calories to go in and out are more complicated and may be a combination of genetic and learned. I may learn to be a healthy weight, but I expect it will always be a battle.

I agree, some people think that they can’t possibly tolerate being hungry for a few hours, that it’s terrible and unnatural . But for most people it’s just normal.

Of course for people whose diet is mostly sugar and carbs, they will get big swings in their blood sugar and the dips could make them feel lightheaded or dizzy. They think the solution is to have a sugary coffee and a biscuit when it would actually be to have fat, protein and vegetables.

That why people keep saying “ oh you don’t understand, it’s harder for me to be slim because I get hungry , I have a big appetite , I get headaches, I need to eat every hour “ . As if they are a different type of human from others and it’s easy for everyone else.

Yes it’s easy for a few people, but most slim people( especially middle aged ones ) are that way because they watch what they eat.

The truth is

Everyone gets hungry, but it won’t kill you for a few hours. Also it’s habit, you get more hungry at meal times. If you don’t eat, it doesn’t go on getting worse. It subsides.

You will get more hungry and sooner if your diet is mostly carbs.

You don’t need 3 meals and 3 snacks a day, whatever your granny told you. If you are constantly eating, esp carbs, you won’t lose weight because your insulin level stays high and your body can’t access the stored fat to burn.

The headaches are probably caused by your sugar and / or caffeine addiction. You need to take less or wean yourself off ( or go cold turkey ) like any drug .

I think it's genetic in respect of gaining weight. We go away as a family often, everyone eats & drinks too much, my weight remains the same, everyone else complains that they need to shift the post holiday pounds!!

Because of lowered activity on some days now I got rid of my 3pm mini meal (usually yogurt with fruit or just fruit or slice of toast with something) and I am starving come dinner.
I had a flashback into my childhood😂
"Muuuuuuum. I am staaaaaaaarving." "Don't you dare eat anything, dinner will be in an hour".
I had that kind of conversation with myself now😂

No need to feel embarrassed by going out running alone!
Start really gently with a ‘scouts pace’: run 15 steps, walk 15, run 15, walk 15. You may need to increase the ‘walk’ to begin with. Then gradually increase the run steps.

You will be amazed at how quickly you progress.