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Original poster

How do I explain the rules to DH??

53 replies

MamaInNeed · 05/04/2020 09:55

Just that really. He doesn't seem to understand what "one form of exercise a day" means. Yesterday he went to the shops (about a mile round trip, he walked), took DC on a walk and then decided to go on a bike ride! I can understand the first 2, we need to eat and DC need to exercise, but a bike ride after 2 walks is just taking the piss right? On top of that, I'm an NHS worker and am treating coronavirus patients daily, so he's more likely to pass it on than most people. I tried telling him, but he apparently "needs" a daily bike ride Hmm (it's not like DC are going out every day either, they prefer to exercise in the garden so he can go on a bike ride then). Anyone know how to explain this to a stubborn middle aged man?

OP posts:
BreathlessCommotion · 05/04/2020 10:32

get over yourself good example of disregarding mental health there. Why not tell me to pull myself together.

Going for a run is the only way to be on my own. It allows me to process things, it's like meditation.

I think telling suicidal people to get a grip is beyond disgusting.

category12 · 05/04/2020 10:32

If he doesn't want to understand simple instructions, then there's no magic form of words you're going to come up with that are going to persuade him otherwise.

StrongMama1989 · 05/04/2020 10:35

Thing is.. he is totally in his right to do what he’s been doing as long as he keeps away from people. It’s not the law you can only go out once a day for exercise, in fact Boris mentioned it on TV when he announced the lockdown but in the official consensus it says nothing about the amount of times you can go out , just that it must be essential - food or exercise or medical reasons. What’s the problem if he goes out for exercise as long as he doesn’t mix with others?

swishthecat · 05/04/2020 10:39

Hancock has said today that the government will ban all exercise outside if people keep taking the piss. Sad

NathanNathan · 05/04/2020 10:41

Everyone wants to go out!! I couldn't want to go out more for a bloody bike ride!

If you don't need to get food or medicines, you get one opportunity to exercise per day. It's very simple.

If people don't do this, we will ALL be doing this for longer, and longer.

Please stop!

TotesGodsWill · 05/04/2020 10:43

He’s going to kill people with his selfishness

Just like all the others on here who “need” multiple trips out every day because they’re special and rules don’t apply to them. Walking the dog/kids is your daily exercise. You can exercise more at home or in your garden but you should not be going out of your home to exercise more than once per day. Breaking the rules is killing people. Including those who are exposed as part of their vital job like nurses.

The selfish idiots who can’t understand this are the ones who will force the government to take daily exercise off the list of acceptable excuses to go out.

boli · 05/04/2020 10:51

You can't, he's thick

pantsforhats · 05/04/2020 10:53

We should all be limiting our time outside as much as we practically can, mental health allowing.

I haven't taken my kids outside for a walk every day as they can play in the garden and I'm limiting my runs to x3 weekly. But I'm still community working so I'm out 4 days a week in and out of peoples homes, petrol stations, shops, pharmacies.

It also helps to keep me sane as I still see colleagues and patients most days so I'm not stuck in the house with the dementors. I have so much empathy for those who are in the house all day, especially those without outside space.

fuggyfush · 05/04/2020 10:54

We've been taking it in turns to get exercise vs. walk the children. If we all go out together, one of us brings the children home and the other (already in sports kit) continues for a longer walk or run..

MrsDoylesTeaBags · 05/04/2020 10:55

How frustrating for you OP, especially as you see the reality of this ilness on a daily basis. Thank you for your hard work and dedication.

Has your hussband seen the news today? Unfortunately there are a few too many people like him who think they're 'different' and that will have consequences for all of us. www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-52172035

gingersausage · 05/04/2020 11:03

He’s a grown man. You don’t need to “explain the rules” to him, unless he has SN. He knows the fucking rules 🤦‍♀️.

WeAllHaveWings · 05/04/2020 11:08

No one needs to go out more than one a day to exercise and those flouting the rules will lead to a complete lockdown for all. Some will not cope with a complete lockdown and those flouting the rules (not the legislation) will be responsible.

Everyone can fulfil their exercise needs (not wants) at home, if you need time out tell your fame, go to your bedroom, close the door and put on some headphones. Don't cause the lockdown restrictions to be increased due to your selfishness.

HippoPudgy · 05/04/2020 11:11

People will kill themselves if they ban outside exercise.

The problem is though, if people like the OP's DH keep being selfish and going out more than necessary when they don't absolutely need to, then the government WILL ban it. I live in the UAE. All exercise, (even dog walkers are being sent home and told if they are spotted again they will be fined), is banned. Only one person per household is allowed to go out and then only for essentials.

Just being devil's advocate here and looking totally cold-heartedly at numbers as a paper exercise, the sad fact is that the government may have to take a decision - will numbers of lives lost through suicide because people can't go outside to exercise (probably a minute amount, although depression rates will no doubt rise) outweigh the lives saved by lowering the spread of Covid 19 (many, many more).

Is anyone's right to exercise and protect their mental health more important than the right to life to be protected from catching an invisible but deadly virus even when all the precautions are taken. I can't answer that, can you?

Spacerader · 05/04/2020 11:13

@BreathlessCommotion I am not saying dont go out, go out have your run, that's fine, this was aimed at the ops husband who thinks its acceptable to go out 3 times a day. That is who my get over yourself comment is aimed at.

@StrongMama1989 I think you will find in Wales where the op is from that it is in fact law thatvyoh can only go out for exercise once a day, it was written into legislation this past week.

Namechangedforthis1357 · 05/04/2020 11:34

You have a FUCKING GARDEN and the cunt is moaning?

WTF?

AprilFloundering · 05/04/2020 11:40

.... so he's akin to the MAMILs seen cycling around in their cycling groups all over the country yesterday ... rules don't apply to white middle aged men, didn'tcha know?

Infuriating.

Shamoo · 05/04/2020 11:40

He understands. He just doesn’t care.

myfav · 05/04/2020 11:41

I watched a programme the other day 'into the red zone' it was on sky but think it's been put on YouTube now. It's filmed in Italy with the reporter being allowed access into a covid ward. If that wouldn't put anyone off going out unnecessarily then nothing will.

Silentplikebath · 05/04/2020 11:51

Tell him that it’s because of selfish idiots like him that I haven’t left my house in a month because I’m considered high risk. I don’t expect to leave my home or have any visitors for several more months.

Perhaps you need to be more graphic about explaining how people actually die from the virus. Remind him that a 5 year old died yesterday.

Wineiscooling · 05/04/2020 11:56

I get the need for exercise, I'm a big runner and have been for years and like others have said it's been great for my mental health, it's my form of meditation. However, I don't see why people can't make adjustments for now. So I combine my daily exercise with dog walk and getting kids out, I've ran with the kids on bikes next to me, or we've all done bike ride together, the dog running beside us. It's not the ideal and I'm not running as long or as fast but it's still exercise and will keep a basic level of fitness until this is over.
I ran alone today but the kids will be out in garden so we can skip going out and my OH can walk the dog. We've all got to adjust but if some don't the majority are going to get fed up.

MNHQ
LilyMumsnet · 05/04/2020 12:00

We've turned voting off for you now, OP.

GreenLeafedLemon · 05/04/2020 12:07

Watch The Happening, we watched it last night, that will make you less keen to go out !! 🤣🤣😇😷😷

Barbararara · 05/04/2020 12:07

Have you explained that he could be responsible for killing you?

A vitally important goal of lockdown is to reduce the number of people presenting in hospital, reducing the viral load that nhs workers are exposed to.

The less people catching this, the less nhs front line staff die.

We need the vulnerable to stay in to keep the numbers needing ventilators manageable.
We need the young, fit asymptomatically super spreaders to stay in.
We need to press pause long enough to identify where the virus is right now, and keep it there. Then in a short while we should be able to use contact tracing more effectively again.

You can do a very challenging workout with a skipping rope standing on the spot because you have to continually lift your own body weight against gravity. You can work every muscle in your body doing one armed chin ups on the door frame.

GabsAlot · 05/04/2020 12:14

So for some people its ok if he goes out three times because one is on a bike

ffs -wish it was more like france now

foodandwine89 · 05/04/2020 12:20

You have a garden and he still goes out 3 times a day? You married a selfish arsehole and no one can help you