To be annoyed at my FIL

[nsav]

Hi everyone

I currently am 23 weeks pregnant and social distancing as I have severe asthma and took immunosuppressants routinely until I fell pregnant. I would be certain to die if I contracted COVID-19 and after having a terrible asthma attack on Friday, I’m absolutely dreading the health of myself and my baby!

Me and DP have the keys to our house but can’t move in as our carpet fitter has been delayed (obv - and we have no carpet in the house just now).

We currently stay with DPs family - DP mum, 1 teenage sister, 2 early teenage brothers, and DP mums boyfriend of 3 years. We don’t stay in the house but in an outbuilding in the garden that DP built. It’s basically a bedroom attached to his office in the garden. This makes us sound posh but we’re not 😂

DP mum has severe asthma too and is also not working just now.

DP mums boyfriend has just left to get on a ferry and go to an island to work for the next week even though the whole house are isolating. He’s not a key worker. We have told him numerous times that we are very annoyed due to being high risk and to go to his elderly mothers when he’s back. He says no because they’re in their 70s and high risk - SO ARE WE!! He stopped his 2 children coming round last weekend and has told SIL she can’t go see her boyfriend due to the possibility of him bringing it in to the family. We’re on lockdown now so that doesn’t matter much, he’s just hypocritical.

He isn’t registered at the house so it’s not his house but DP mum isn’t actually displaying how annoyed she is. DP has gone through him like a tonne of bricks how he’s endangering all of our lives - high risk or not.

AIBU to be absolutely livid that he’s endangering our lives like this?!

@TealWater Excuse you?!? You're suggesting children shouldn't be around unmarried people?!?!? What the actual f?! You do realise it is possible to be fully, 100% committed within a relationship without a certificate to prove it, don't you!?

The 1950s calked, they want their Headmistress back...

I'm an unmarried parent - I'd better await a visit from social services

@nsav to try to insist he goes to his elderly parents' house as you're at risk too is exceptionally selfish of you. Listen to yourself

THIS.

Staggered that you think it is acceptable to demand he puts you before his elderly parents... Who do you think you are? I read your previous thread and I also picked up on your entitled and overbearing behaviour then, too.
You seem to think you own your boyfriend's mother and her house.....

wouldn’t call it spiteful, it’s just putting it into the wider picture that he will protect his mum and dad but not us? He lives with us and sees us everyday. Considering he isn’t yet registered as living here, and we pay the rent I think we have the right to safety, no?

Urgh. How obnoxious. He's your boyfriend of two years' mum's boyfriend. Seriously, why on earth do you think he should put you above his parents? What do you believe he owes you?! How bizarre.
I think we're just going to have to agree to disagree. You have an answer for everything so I'm sure you'll sort something out. Stamp your foot harder, maybe you'll make them see how important you, and you alone, are then.

Urgh. How obnoxious. He's your boyfriend of two years' mum's boyfriend. Seriously, why on earth do you think he should put you above his parents? What do you believe he owes you?! How bizarre.

He didn’t have to put anyone at risk as he didn’t have to take the extra work. He (rightly) doesn’t want to endanger his parents, but quite happy to endanger OP (who would most likely die if he passed anything on to her) for no reason.

He’s a selfish fuck. Hope your house will be ready before he’s back and if not that your MIL stands up to him.

Which island has he gone to?

He's probably a greater risk to the islanders.

Nobody actually knows their financial situation. OP can guess all age likes but nobody but him and possibly his partner knows. Maybe he did need to take on the work.
If OP is so vulnerable then wouldn't it make sense for her to be the one to isolate to control that risk herself rather than expect everyone else to? You can rarely trust others to be as careful as you'd be yourself.

Tealwater aka stirrer.

OP
Get running water and a toilet in the house.

You can cook by microwave.
You can have 1950s style washes in a big tub filled by 4/5 kettles. The technique is to put cold water in a bucket. About half full. Then add hot water until it is warm enough. Then you get into the empty tub e.g. a very big basin. Bring in the bucket, don't pour it in. Then you get your sponge/flannel and soap yourself. Then a jug to rinse off. The tub is not to soak in like a bath, just to collect the water if you see what I mean.

Then DH can empty the bathwater down the toilet, or down the back garden drain, whatever is available.

Haven op could die if infected. If that's being entitled then fine.