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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Daughter walking home from school alone

47 replies

cheesemongery · 29/03/2020 20:28

Posting for traffic as this concerns my decision tomorrow.

DD and I were in isolation on GP advice before the schools closed and lockdown.

It turns out I am a key worker - in the loosest sense of the word. Normally DD would go to her Dads, but he is now presenting symptoms so I spoke to the school and very kindly they are accepting her next week and ongoing if needed.

Work are not happy with me saying I will need to leave site for 20 mins a day to collect her and drop her home saying (as she is year 6) then she should walk home as she did before.

I'm not even sure the school will allow this under the circumstances and also I don't want her to. Police are checking on peoples essential journey's, DD is terrified she will be stopped and also with the streets so quiet I do not want her out there on her own for a mile walk home.

Has anybody any experience of this? Are they allowed to walk home alone (I would think not) is there any legislation? I want to be able to show work that I must pick her up, or I feel like just telling them to stick their job as DD comes first.

Any knowledge gratefully received.

OP posts:
Piratefairy78 · 30/03/2020 01:14

I get where you are coming from. DH and I are both key workers and I have had to cut my working day to school hours as the school is not doing wrap around care. Luckily my work are grateful for what I can do. It’s made harder here as I have a year 9 with ASD who is attending school as well as my Year 5 & 6. Both schools have stipulated that to reduce the likelihood of children walking together before and after school that they must be picked up and dropped off by a household member. My year 9 is hating that!!

SleepingStandingUp · 30/03/2020 01:23

Glad you're getting her op. At our scho thry can walk home in Yr 6 if the parent signs it off, but it's a busy route for most kids with lots of other parents around.
I'd worry about the adults you insist on having an opinion stopping your DD and telling her off for being out.

cabbageking · 30/03/2020 01:32

School has no authority to limit when a parent allows a child to walk home alone or not.

It is up to the parent to decide and each child and situation varies.

You need to decide or leave work early. It isn't a Police issue and there will be other children at other schools doing the same thing.

Purpleartichoke · 30/03/2020 01:34

I wouldn’t let my 11 year old walk home
These days. I don’t let her walk home now unless I meet her where the last child breaks off because we are the furthest from
School.

EmeraldShamrock · 30/03/2020 01:41

Yanbu. Like others I've no issue on a normal school day, the streets are empty a mile is long way I wouldn't like my 11 y.o doing it. Your job are dickheads.

JemSynergy · 30/03/2020 01:56

No, I wouldn't be happy with it and I'd be standing my ground with work - no one including my place of work would dictate to me about whether or not it is safe for my child to walk home alone.

Wewearpinkonwednesdays · 30/03/2020 02:06

*This is the one thing that pisses me off about MN - why bloody ask?
lol

Well did you not want the OP to make a decision?
What a silly thing to say 🤔

SleepingStandingUp · 30/03/2020 04:01

School has no authority to limit when a parent allows a child to walk home alone or not.
The teacher opens the door, clocks the care giver for child X and let's X out the door. No parent, no exit. If a parent didn't collect a Yr 5 or below child, they'd take the appropriate measures but it wouldn't be sending the child home alone.

Worriedmum54321 · 30/03/2020 07:36

I think you are right op. I live in a nice area and there are dubious people about all of a sudden. Otherwise very quiet. Plus there is a strange atmosphere of people almost avoiding each other. Plus it's only for 2 weeks. I would definitely collect her.

Hercules12 · 30/03/2020 07:42

I wouldn't be happy with this on current times. You do need to pick her up.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 30/03/2020 08:08

I like the cycling option. If that's not possible then Id pick her up. Work will have to deal.

WelcomeToShootingStars · 30/03/2020 08:31

You're her mother, so you're best placed to know how appropriate it would be for her to walk home. Your boss, and a bunch of Internet strangers, will only ever look at their own experience when giving you advice.

If you feel she shouldn't be doing it then that's that. There should be flexibility from all directions at the moment.

Bramboo · 30/03/2020 08:58

agree with you. I’d be happy for my 11 year old to walk home when she’s with friends and it’s busy, I wouldn’t when it’s isolated.

^This 100%

Bluepeace · 30/03/2020 09:01

School has no authority to limit when a parent allows a child to walk home alone or not

Of course they do, would you be happy if schools just let 5 year olds wonder home? The school is responsible for safe guarding, they choose the age they are happy to release a child on their own. As I say ours usually allows with parental consent from year 4, but are not releasing children without a parent or caregiver at the moment.

EssentialGarage · 30/03/2020 09:04

Sorry not rtft but I would not let my child walk home atm as the streets are so quiet. It would be easy to kidnap a child and no one would see. I've always let mine walk since year 4 but I won't any more.

GabriellaMontez · 30/03/2020 09:15

The streets are very quiet at the moment. Usually full of school kids at that time.

Now its mainly just the odd weirdo. I wouldn't let her.

itsgettingweird · 30/03/2020 09:40

Can you confirm you said that customers were coming into your place of work?

I'd be questioning that above the works inflexibility.

If you can lone work what are their reasons you can't WFH?

Many questions here but I think work will need to consider whether they want you in bar a short period or not at all.

BatInTheAttic · 30/03/2020 11:10

Glad you have made your decision. Now is not the time for stepping into independence, but is the time for her to feel safe.

TheBitchOfTheVicar · 30/03/2020 18:52

I am really relaxed about my 10 yr old walking home with her friends (close-knit village; less than a mile) usually... at this time, nfw!

YANBU

cheesemongery · 30/03/2020 21:15

Evening all - foot put down and work allowed me to collect her and drop her home then head back to work.

That's fine with me - she's safe at home for 2 hours, doesn't stray further than her bed and kindle.

Your job are dickheads @EmeraldShamrock that cracked me up, thank you Grin.

@itsgettingweird - yes there are customers coming in, but they have to speak to us in the office via the telephone - it's a weird set up. IMO it could be done mainly from home, but that would set a precedent for the business nationally and because I could do it from home, doesn't mean that others could - of that makes sense.

DD had a lovely day though, just 14 of them in school - they made their own juggling bean bags which she enjoyed.

Strange times... Thank you for all the opinions, I've taken them all on board, we all live in different areas so some understand the eeriness at the moment, others in busier areas. We're all just trying to do the best by our kids and keep our jobs at the same time (wish I was covered by furlough).

Oh and the school did say she could walk home alone if she had her phone - it's not worth the worry to me or her and sorted now with a little foot stamping Wink Grin

OP posts:
Hercules12 · 31/03/2020 07:16
Smile
ScrapThatThen · 31/03/2020 07:41

I would do same as you. I actually felt unsafe jogging home at 7 last night, and I never usually do. The population is stressed and it's bringing out the worst in some.

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