To ask if I go to the cemetery?

[orangejuicer]

Sorry if this should be moved to the other board but it's the three year anniversary of losing my mum in April. Assuming we are still in the same lockdown AIBU to go to the cemetery? It's not exactly essential travel is it?

I’m to my mums grave tomorrow to lay flowers for her birthday.

Well, today.

Go to the cemetery.
Sorry for your loss. 💐

Will you do anything in particular in her honour?

orange what do you mean?

If it is in walking distance then count it as your daily exercise and go.

If it is not, then light a candle for her or something special for her in your home and go to the cemetery when the lockdown is lifted. Your mum would not want you to put yourself or others at risk.

There's another thread discussing a similar question - it's not clear whether they're allowed to be open except for funerals.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/3863724-are-we-allowed-to-visit-cemeteries

nicknacky sorry I just meant are you planning to do anything to honour/celebrate her birthday even though she's no longer with you, but it was worded badly.

No, I will just go and lay flowers and have a chat. It’s walking distance from my house.

I didn’t go on Mother’s Day as I wasn’t up to it with everything that’s going on so I’m going tomorrow.

Thanks ella it's not in walking distance. If it happens to be a day when I'm picking up a shopping order then I might go on the way but I'll see what the situation is like.

If its on the same route of going to get shopping then I do not see the harm. If not then there are lots of other things you can do to remember her. I am not sure if it is just you, or if you have family, but you could all write a poem for her together which you can then go and to the cemetery to tell her later on. Or you could make her something which you could later take. Or do an activity that she liked doing.

The place your mum is closest to you is in your memories, and I am sure that is how she would rather you would remember her. The cemetery isn't going anywhere. Think about what your mum would want to do if she was stuck indoors and remember her that way :)

You need to check the cemetery is open first. I'm a burials clerk and all of our cemeteries have been closed to everyone except funeral parties of 5 or less mourners.