Hi, just trying to understand how bad this is. DH looks excuses for fights. For example, he cooked himself eggs yesterday and left dirty pan and dishes on kitchen counter.
I asked him to wash his dishes, because otherwise he leaves them to pile up and for me to wash. We don’t have a dishwasher.
He did wash the dishes last night (leaving puddles on counter and food in plug hole) but went to sleep in spare bedroom. I went to study with plate of food to do work (WFH during CV). He shouted to me that it’s unacceptable that I bring food upstairs and that I need to eat at kitchen dining table.
I asked why he was being a hypocrite given he had toast and biscuits in bed that very afternoon. He said that we both need to stop it, as he doesn’t want to live like a pig. This is whilst there’s Belvita biscuit wrappers strewn across spare room floor and his clothes in our bedroom spilling out of his side of wardrobe. I wash my dishes as soon as I’ve used them, unless I’m upstairs, in which case I’ll take them down the next morning to wash them. I wouldn’t mind if washed his dishes the next day but he doesn’t unless I remind him. I used to wash his and mine dishes in the sink, but he never reciprocated so I ask him to wash his own now.
Sorry to ramble, the point is, he does this a lot. When I ask him to do something, he does it but immediately looks for an excuse for a fight. Last week I asked to take rubbish downstairs and he did but came up and said I wasn’t allowed to pull the hallway blind down anymore at night.
Is this abusive or bickering?