‘Treating isolation like a holiday’

[Theyearofthestress]

Everyone is so angry and it’s doing my head in! Taking the mick out of people ‘treating this as a holiday’ because they’re doing their house up, or some gardening or god forbid have a bbq when the weather is nice.

Why are some people so keen to pounce on everyone and tell them they aren’t doing quarantine right? Haven’t we got enough to worry about? It is shit times for everyone, lots have lost their jobs, have huge changes to routine, worried for their health, kids are confused, adults are scared- why is it so wrong to try and make the most out of a shit situation?

We can’t go outside, so people are doing the right thing by staying in yet online everywhere are people complaining ‘Dave next door is treating this like a bloody holiday, with his gardening’ even a news article I read today condemned people who would have a bbq right now.

It’s like we should sit inside in silence in order to be doing this right.

I wish everyone would shut up moaning about other people, if you are staying inside you are doing the right thing. So AIBU to do whatever I can to pass the time, be it gardening, bbqs, painting... anything and tell others to mind their own business?

Stay at home and stop socialising. It's quite fucking simple.

I knew it was coming and did some panic shopping, things like a lawnmower and garden stuff etc that we needed (or “needed”), new shoes for DS etc

I 'panic bought' a lawnmower and shoes for DS too!

But isn’t it just about thinking about others - especially if you live in close proximity now we all find ourselves having to stay at home?

It isn’t at all that people are being competitively miserable or saying we don't all have the need to find projects and useful/enriching things to do. It’s just that we need to consider that some things affect other people and we are just all trying to get by. E.g. burning garden waste will be affecting people’s breathing right now and mean people stuck inside can’t have their windows open. Noisy power tools on all day could make it difficult for a neighbour to work from home. Very loud music blasting out because your teenager is bored will make it hard for baby next door to sleep, etc.

Can’t we all be more considerate? We are living in unusual times and it’s disconcerting how people are determined to say “I have the right to have a fire/make noise and that’s just tough on everyone else because I need things to do?”

If it doesn’t affect anyone else then crack on with whatever makes you and your family happy.

Called at Lidl today to get milk and bread and picked up some bedding plants and seeds and will be gardening tomorrow, and DH painting outside of house. Nothing wrong with that. All rules being followed. Don’t focus on what other people think - as long as you’re following the rules just ignore them.

We are doing lots of bits around the house.
Sorting the garden out.
And having social time with friends and neighbours via FaceTime

I agree - the more usefully busy we all are - the better for our overall health I think. I am working (from home), but to suggest that people should not be doing enjoyable activities just makes a really hard time even harder.

Remember on mumsnet you are only supposed to be sitting in bed crying. Make sure you don't look at anyone or you will spread the virus and they will die.

Dd and I went shopping for stuff to repaint her room, before social distancing came in, so well before lockdown. You could tell it was coming.
And now since lockdown I’ve been feeling too ill to paint anything, but it’ll keep!

Hang on, what's the problem with gardening?

Gwenhwyfar that's a miserable attitude to have. Should people not post holiday photos because I can't afford to go anywhere or post pictures of themselves out for a drive because I can't afford lessons? You can't go through life with that attitude.

I have seen this on a DIY group on Facebook. Someone posted an innocent question about painting her living room (she wasn't going to go out to the shop to buy paint) and she got so much abuse she left the group.
Basically along the lines of "it's not supposed to be a holiday!"
"how dare you be doing something as trivial as decorating when people are dying?"

Same with a gardening group. Someone asks about mowing the lawn and someone is like "YOU HAVE TO STAY INSIDE!"
Then when people point out that your allowed in your own garden.
"WELL WE WILL ALL DIE AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!"

As long as people are staying in their home or garden, I don't see how it matters how much fun they have or don't have (within reason with noise levels).

I'm finding homeschooling and working hard, so envy friends who are paid regardless of working. However, my friends in the NHS are facing really tough work and no additional pay. That is my reality check!

I wish we could get paint via Delivery. We have kept busy the past week painting the fence and sheds out the garden. We have now run out of paint. We will have to sit, twiddling our thumbs or watching TV now.

If people are allowed to buy paint it will give them something to do whilst we stay at home. Everyone will go barmy, through sheer boredom soon

Gwenhwyfar I have stopped posting on Facebook. I have land and paddocks so I started off putting pics of dd and the horses and the sunshine but then thought they'd be nauseating for people who were stuck in the city

You're not being unreasonable OP, I think we should stop ignoring the pious, sanctimonious muppets who haunt these boards. They think they've been appointed by Boris as some sort of hit-squad. The password seems to be 'I despair'. If you say it in capital letters, you're more worthy still...

Ignore them all...

"Gwenhwyfar that's a miserable attitude to have. Should people not post holiday photos because I can't afford to go anywhere or post pictures of themselves out for a drive because I can't afford lessons? You can't go through life with that attitude."

The people I know are nicer than you. They wouldn't go on about their holiday if they knew you couldn't afford it.

" I have land and paddocks so I started off putting pics of dd and the horses and the sunshine but then thought they'd be nauseating for people who were stuck in the city"

Thank you! It's hard enough without being reminded of what you're missing out on.

I’ve been gardening all day
I’m working from home long hours rest of week so it was nice to get done fresh air and exercise
Wish I’d end organised enough to buy plants and fence paint - at least I’ve got oil to revive my garden furniture
Tomorrow I’m planning to clean out the pond
Not been out of the house since Thursday when I did a small food shop so glad of the exercise

Gwenhwyfar so you don’t know anyone who shares holiday pictures on social media, at all?

Wait, how am I going to die because someone else mows their lawn? Pls explain!

(Not you, RightOnTheEdge, but I'd love to hear from the people who want to drive anyone who steps out into their own garden back inside with flaming arrows.)

@Gwenhwyfar if you’re that miserable about other people’s social media then don’t look!

Tomorrow DH is going to jet wash the patio (our neighbours did theirs today so can’t moan really, not that I think they would)
I wondered about this. Is it in UK in general or only some areas where Sunday i s a no no for noisy stuff?

"Jealousy isn’t a nice trait!"

Neither is making others feel bad.
Not having a pool is hardly the same as not having a garden. I don't care about not being able to swim. I care about being cooped up 23 hours out of 24.

Gwenhwyfar

I actually agree with you. It's a funny time. I'm avoiding fb tbh. I really genuinely feel for kids stuck in with no outside time, and parents who might not get on and fight a lot.

"I'm not sure how it makes any difference to anyone else or breaks any rules if he cooks on the BBQ in the garden rather than indoors?"

The smell on someone else's clean washing maybe?

Theres a lot of judging going on! People on our local fb page are whinging how busy "their" normal dog walk is because other people are also walking, people taking pics of empty railway platforms saying that's good (did they interview everyone getting on the train or know there wasnt a good reason when they were still getting the train) The lockdown took immediate effect in the evening after most people had got home from work.My DH is SE and went to work the next day to close up and bring laptop and essential stuff home, (95% of job cant be done at home)

Same with the high street, people moaning about how busy it was but they must have been there themselves to know! (I haven't been into town for 10 days so I've no idea.) People judging the packed tubes saying how irresponsible people were or deliberately ignoring the message. These weren't families out on a jolly, they were mainly, if not all people trying to get to work that they presumably couldn't do from home!