To stop my ex visiting our son?

[IhaveaBigBum]

Bit of background although not sure if it's relevant...7 years together, 1 DS 17 months old.
We broke up in January as I found out he had another child that was born while we were together (conceived just before we met).
He moved out in February and has been seeing DS pretty much whenever he wants. I'm a SAHM so will take all the help I can get as DS is an energy ball and an early riser to boot.
Ex is a key worker for EMS so is coming into contact with people. He also went to London to visit friends and family earlier this week (don't even get me started on that).
I made the decision that its best he doesn't come and visit DS as I feel he is high risk to pass on the virus to us.
Am I being OTT as he is obviously very upset and I feel awful about it but it's the sensible option isnt it?
How are other single parents managing contact arrangements if their ex is a key worker?

It sounds like you have maintained a good contact which is amazing bit in the circumstances it's much better for your ex to keep away.

Unfortunately key workers are haning to make alot of sacrifices at the moment and I feel this I'd end of them.

Omg sorry so many typos, sorry didn't read it back!

This lockdown could last for months. As long as he's maintaining strict hygiene routines then there is a minimal chance of the virus being passed on. Are you prepared to not let him see his son for months?

As an aside, you left him because he had sex with someone before you even met?

Oh well at least he has his other child he might be allowed to see 🤷‍♀️

I left him because he had a baby that was born while we were together and decided not to tell me about it. He pays maintenance for this child as CSA made him do a DNA test but has never met her.
I'm definitely not stopping him seeing our DC out of spite because I made a huge effort to keep things as civil as possible and as I stated above I need all the help I can get.
I know this could go on for months which is why I'm doubting my decision, as I dont want to damage my sons relationship with his dad.

If he is not following government instructions then I wouldn’t allow it either . Can do Skype instead.

Keep evidence that he hasn’t been following government instructions.. however you know

Guidance is to allow Skype instead.

Talk to him about it as you want to avoid him getting the hump and going to court in the future to secure time formally but he will have a long wait on his hands

Advice at the moment is to allow contact as normal but it also this does t HAVE to happen if you consider it goes too much against stay at home guidance and is against the child’s best interests then maybe not .. but you’d need to be able to justify it to courts in future

Bit random to include why you broke up.. it’s irrelevant I’d say other than the fact he is a bit of a untrustworthy character. Did he know of the baby for all those 7 years

Yes he knew about her the whole 7 years. 8 found out through someone else and he still tried to deny it until I asked to see his bank statements.
I guess I was adding the situation for context to show that I'm making the effort to stay reasonable and not using our son as a weapon to hurt him despite his previous behaviour.
Like everyone else in the world I'm so anxious and stressed about the current situation and I keep reading news stories of healthy and young people dying from the disease.
I have a friend currently recovering from the virus and she had to self isolate from her daughter for 2 weeks... if this were to happen to me I have nobody to care for my son.