To plot to get my mother put in a home when she turns 55?

[EscapeFrom]

I intend to somehow obtain some LSD, slip it into her rum and coke, wait for it to take effect, then quickly contact the GP and have him bring another doctor with him, and have her committed. Due to her age, and fragile state, she will be booted into a home straightaway and I will be able to visit her every 3 months with toffees she can't chew and slippers that don't fit, and send my brother to steal her ornaments.

I told her this in Tescos, and she said she wasn't giving me a lift home if that was the case!

no YANBU

YANBU if you fully expect your children to do the same to you when you're 55.

Why wait so long?

agree with hurly

YANBU but maybe you shouldn't have ruined the element of surprise if you've already told her of your plot.
Don't be surprised if she spends her 55th birthday on a cruise spending your inheritance on a cabin boy.

Dang!

She would too, the raddled ol' boot.

But that's ok, because she'll be on guard coming up to her 55th birthday, just bring the plot forward a year! Grab her at 54 instead she won't be expecting that...

I can't, they won't take her until she's 55!

Could you keep her in a basement till then?

Buy her the slippers for the Xmas before her birthday & make her wear them (N.B. may need extra LSD for this though), then she won't be able to shuffle quickly enough to avoid the granny catchers from the home .

Don't forget, the slippers have to be the ones with the huge velcro flap & smell of wee (even of the wearer isn't incontinent.....yet).