When parents (or PILs) stay over, help or more work for you?

[Pickie]

Just had my mom over for a weekend. Love her to bits and a shame she lives across the pond but OMG it is like having another child to clean up after.

Cannot believe she raised 2 children and did a very good job (ahum)My dad was hardly ever there for work reasons.

She took DD out and when she came back she had a cornetto which had to be shown to all of us, icecream trail through the house as she starts at bottom if ice cream! Find my mother in a chair looking at the sky why why why!

Dont say anything but arrhhh. When my dad stays over it is bliss as he cooks, cleans actively plays with the kids and we go to the pub at night!

Rant over, she comes every 6 weeks and always look forward to it but then when she arrives I remember the extra workload!

when my PILs come to stay it is helpful as MIL plays with the DSs and always baths them and puts them to bed - leaving me downstairs with FIL who sits and reads the Daily Mail and reads out articles he thinks I might be interested in.....

I dread my MIL visiting... she turned up with her boyfriend and some random bloke they knew when my DD was 2 weeks old,stayed 10 mins, went out for a fag then disapperaed for 3 hours to the pub. We thought, fine, whatever, so cooked ourselves dinner. They then turned up again and ate our dinner then asked for a lift to their hotel.

So glad I put my foot down and said no overnight guests!

Get a smaller house. We are in a little terrace with two bedrooms and no bed settee. No chance of houseguests since we had the kids.
BIL and his GF had to buy a big house when 2nd child arrived, now getting very cheesed off that his mother (my mil), fil and their horrid dog have got into the habit of just coming and staying for whole weekends and sometimes midweek to see their grandchildren. They just come over to ours for a couple of hours in the after noon then are gone, back to stay at BILs so BIL currently spending a lot of weekends in the pub, GF bending his ear about it, IL's blissful in their ignorance of what a pain they are being!

Pickie, can totally relate. I PAY for my dad's tickets over here as he is soooo easy and helpful (in total contrast to my childhood/adolescence, when I'd have paid him to stay away from me), whereas my mom is a gigantic child and I am sooooo glad she is 6000 miles away (and no chance would i get her a ticket, the loon).

My parents stay in a hotel when the visit. The only extra work is remembering to buy lots of tea, we go through a 3 month supply in a weekend. They don't do anything around the house but the do entertain ds which is great.

My MIL is a bit too old for the 13 hour flight so doesn't come and stay anymore.

To op, bit of both.

My mum's here every Friday. She makes our tea, does washing and ironing usually. And that is MARVELLOUS.

But

• she puts all colours in teh wash together
• sometimes washes towels at 40 and woollens at 60
• irons the transfers on dds' and dh's t shirts so messes iron and t shirts
• leaves grease splattered all over cooker and up the walls

I just try not to look too closely now as I thank her.

My mum washes, cleans, irons, hoovers and gets up early to spring clean my kitchen. (Guilt from living so far away)
My IL's watch telly, drink tea and eat my biscuits.
Oh, and they wash up but then put everything in the wrong place
(bowls don't go on piles of plates, and saucepans don't go in the cupboard with the glass bowls and stuff in, they go in the cupboard with the fecking saucepans in, it's not hard!!!!!)

I just dont understand, my mom has just lost the mothering sense! This weekend I was ill (on antibiotics) and high fever and she still doesnt do the cooking or keep a close eye on the kids so there was me trying to entertain DC, my mom and in charge of house, dinner etc..

Luckily my DH is very hands on and took over when he came back. He always laughs about it and says he can see where I get my dipsy moments from. He only gets upset that she doesnt put the sugarspoon back in the jar correctly and still tries to shut it when it obvious doesnt!

Wouldnt want to trade her in for another mom but it would be so nice to have a bit more help!

My Aged Parents are great and Ma will always help out with whatever I want and need. PILs on the other hand (well MIL to be precise) are a PITA.

Last time they came (Nov last year thank goodness) I couldn't leave her with DS cos she wouldn't get down on the floor and play with him and he just kept crawling to me wherever I was and she just knitted a bloody scarf. I can't ask her to help with the cooking because she can't even peel a sodding potato without losing half the potato in the peelings and that's just a couple of things. I also have to cook vast quantities of food or they think they're being starved.

Dreading this November when they're coming for DS's second birthday and I'm going to have to do a party, feed them and will be 7 mo pg!

Hey ho

My parents and my pils are both good at helping, ironing, cleaning, cooking. It is great.

Although FIL does sit and comment about EVERY item on the news in a Daily Mailish way. I have got into the habit of doing the dishes when the news comes on.