To send my son to nursery next week

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Having a bit of a fall out with ex-DH and just want to check whether IABU.

DS is 4. Nursery is open Tuesday-Thurs (I don't work mon or fri anyway so I can look after him no probs as normal, just at home like everyone else) for children of key workers.

So here it is. Nursery have confirmed that ex-DH qualifies as a key worker. I agree that strictly he does, but I don't think it's in the "spirit": he does work in food production, but he's a scientist researching into producing food in 20 years time. That's not a key worker right now!

I've said DS shouldn't go. My work are understanding and I am happy to have him home with me tues-thurs as I figure it out just like everyone else.

Ex-DH says he qualifies and therefore DS should go to nursery.

Just want to check what you would all do. Our jobs are (thankfully - we are so lucky) very secure, so there is no worry there.

@twoheaped. Our LA have said one key worker parent is enough to access

I wouldn’t send him and his father wouldn’t be seeing him

Only one key worker parent is needed but there has to be no other option. It isn't an entitlement because a parent is a key worker. It is there to allow key workers to attend their shifts if there is no other option for child care.

I will be in school tomorrow to care for the children of key workers. This will put myself and my family at risk. That isn't something I am willing to do for entitled muppets like your ex. I am happy to for keyworkers who are in work or medical staff sleeping after a long shift.

@MowCopCastle that is ridiculous!
Our LA is only one. Both dh and I are classed as key workers, but I really am not (school support staff), our dd is not going in.

No do not send.

There is no point in you social distancing and working from home but also sending your child to nursery where he will get likely get germs!

You are perfectly reasonable

From their communications:
*
Do both parents, if there are two, have to be a key person – or just one?
Children with at least one parent or carer who are identified as critical workers by the government can send their children to school if required.*

I think Friday was the worst day of my working life as I dealt with the amount of people wanting care when the other parent is a SAHP.

I can't unhear what I heard and there are people I never want to have to see again. It's actually shaken my faith in humanity.

Most unanimous IABU ever!! I've shown him this and he's agreed not to send him 👍 wooop

What the fuck is wrong with these men?

My sister is having exactly the same issues with her ex, him demanding both kids go to school and nursery and she is wfh.

I hope they get scabbyknobrot.

Wankers

You are doing the right thing keeping them with you

It's only if you are both absolutely unable to wfh/be at home, or the family is working with a social worker because the child is being neglected/abused and will be in more danger at home. You have no reason to use this.

School/nursery full of key worker families is not the best place to be - think of all those key worker nurses and doctors coming home every night; they're going to catch it and probably badly sadly, and their children will be at risk.

DH is in a similar situ to your DH, but it's work for the future, so he is wfh whilst we both look after/teach DC. I work for government, some involvement in C-19 work, but my work can be done from home, and we've been told to keep children at home with us, leave the schools to those who have absolutely no other choice. They've said it also helps protect not only our children but us too, to have the DC at home and out of the germ pit.

Why would you send your child? The whole point of only sending your child to nursery or school is if you are a key worker and have absolutely no way of providing care for them. If you are not a key worker then do not send your child in. The fact that your ex is a key worker shouldn’t come into it if you’re the main provider.
Otherwise most children will be sent to school which negates the point.

Good news OP.

Just a shame that it took Mumsnet to convince the idiot when he could have just listened to you.

@1066vegan yup!! But glad you all helped!! 👍👍👍 thank you!!