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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Not AIBU but need advice on an expected death

49 replies

PumpkinPie2016 · 21/03/2020 21:12

Sorry for posting here but I need the traffic.

My elderly Nan is in the last few days of life

She is in her own home. Her GP saw her Fri eve and issed a do not rescusitate form and a notice of intent to issue a death certificate along with end of life medication (morphine etc.).

If she passes away when the GP isn't open, does anyone know who is best to call? Obviously, a doctor needs to certify the death but I was trying to get through to 111 earlier for something and simply couldn't.

I have the details of the district nurse and they have been out tonight to give morphine etc. I know they can't certify but will they be able to contact a doctor?

I know I should probably know all of this already but I am surviving on little sleep and my head is a mess.

All advice appreciated.

OP posts:

NemoTeamo · 21/03/2020 21:14

I dont know, maybe 101?

NemoTeamo · 21/03/2020 21:14

Good luck, sorry it sounds very difficult. X

Sooverthemill · 21/03/2020 21:15

You call GP or 111 as soon as you can. In all honesty I thunk you would have to wait until Monday to call GP if it happened before Monday. I'm so sorry

Sooverthemill · 21/03/2020 21:16

Could you call district nurse if you have their number ( if it happened?)

lifecouldbeadream · 21/03/2020 21:16

Sorry you’re having to deal with this.
Call the District Nurse or local out of hours GPs.

Don’t call 101 for an expected death.

Hangingwithmygnomies · 21/03/2020 21:16

So sorry We just lost my Grandad and his funeral is supposed to be on Friday 😔 I think (but someone can correct me if I'm wrong) if you can't get either the DN team or 111, that you might be able to call 999 to inform them. Sending you much love and strength at this difficult time x

Darbs76 · 21/03/2020 21:17

Sorry to hear this. When my dad died last year he was in end stage lung disease. My mum found him and called me. I called the GP surgery but they told me I had to call 999. 999 confirmed this was correct. They asked about resuscitation and I explained he had a DNR so they said we didn’t need to attempt it, otherwise we would have had to. They advised us not to move him (not to take oxygen mask off). They came quite quickly but obviously ambulance might be delayed. They did the relevant paperwork and my mum had to then call a funeral director to come and take him.

I think this is the procedure even for an expected death. I felt bad ringing 999 as it’s not an emergency but first thing I did was ask if this is correct procedure and they said yes it is

hatgirl · 21/03/2020 21:20

You don't have to ring anyone immediately you can wait until the morning (on a weekday, would have to be 111 at a weekend) You can ring 111 when it happens but all they will say is contact the GP and funeral directors in the morning.

When it happens ring the funeral directors when you can and they are usually pretty good at managing things from there if you need them to.

chockaholic72 · 21/03/2020 21:21

When my mum was dying I first rang the night nurse number as she was struggling a little, and then called back and asked for the on-call doctor as we knew it wouldn’t be long. Ask your district nurses, or your local hospice will probably be able to give friendly advice too. Sending love xx

Darbs76 · 21/03/2020 21:22

Ask the district nurse what the preferred approach is at the moment.

Fatted · 21/03/2020 21:25

999 is actually the best option. It probably doesn't seem like an emergency as such, but the operator will expect it and know what to do. Even if it is an expected death, if I happens at home you do legally need to notify the police if a doctor isn't present.

PerkingFaintly · 21/03/2020 21:27

Sorry to hear this.

Yes, I would second calling the funeral directors. If you know who you're going to use, you could actually do this in advance.

I'm sure they'll talk you through what to do. It's possible there will be special arrangements at the moment, and the funeral directors may well know.

Darbs76 · 21/03/2020 21:28

The funeral director cannot take a body without the paperwork to certify the death.

Darbs76 · 21/03/2020 21:28

Not the actual death certificate at that stage but paperwork either by ambulance staff or a doctor to certify the person is dead

GrumpyHoonMain · 21/03/2020 21:29

It is usually 999. When grandfather died an ambulance arrived to take the body and he was pronounced dead immediately. However with Covid-19 it’s possible this procedure may have changed - try calling the hospital directly to see if they can direct you to someone who knows.

GertiMJN · 21/03/2020 21:31

During my Dad's final days, we were told that on weekdays we should wait till the GP surgery was open in the morning. But if it was Friday - Sunday to call 111. If you can't get through to 111 in current circumstances I'd call district nurse who should be able advise.

Superduper13 · 21/03/2020 21:31

I agree with others - my understanding was to call 999.

BorisTheBellend · 21/03/2020 21:31

When this happened to my Mum a few months ago we had to ring out of hours every time she seemed in pain so they could send nurses to give more morphine and then when she did pass we called out of hours again and they sent a nurse out to do paperwork.

So sorry this is happening to you. Please don't hesitate to ring our of hours if your Nan seems to be in pain at all, they can help.

Balkinfly · 21/03/2020 21:31

An out of hours doctor certified my DF's death in the middle of the night and the funeral directers came not long after also early hours 3am-4am. So sorry OP.

Alwaystwomagpies · 21/03/2020 21:32

Certification of death would be done by the GP at a later date

Initially you just need someone to verify death.

This can be a nurse like a DN who is trained to do it. A paramedic or an on call GP.

As it’s expected you don’t need to rush. Try and stay calm and if the DM happens to be on the way then just wait for them.

If not call 111 and they will signpost the right person.

Hope she has a peaceful death.

hatgirl · 21/03/2020 21:35

Even if it is an expected death, if I happens at home you do legally need to notify the police if a doctor isn't present

No you don't. That is the case if it was unexpected though. If someone has been seen by a GP and has a notice of intent to issue a death certificate then the police do not need to be called.

SospanFrangipan · 21/03/2020 21:38

Your local out of hours GP service. They will get in touch with usually a Macmillan nurse to come and certify the death. Please don't call 999!

CustardySergeant · 21/03/2020 21:39

Ringing her GP out of hours should mean that your call is picked up by an "out-of-hours" service, so if I were in your position I would dial her normal GP's number and inform the out-of-hours service to which you should be connected. 111 is likely to be next to impossible to get through to at the moment so at least try her normal GP no. first.

Hangingwithmygnomies · 21/03/2020 21:41

@SospanFrangipan my GP don't have an out of hours, you have to call 111

Soontobe60 · 21/03/2020 21:44

When my nan and MIL died, both times the care homes they were in rang 999. They sent a paramedic who was able to confirm the death. The police also came for my MIL as the rules had changed from when my nan died some years ago.
My MIL was taken to the local mortuary until her GP could issue a death certificate for the undertaker. This took a few days.

So my advice, when she passes away if it is out of surgery hours, ring 999 and they will know exactly what to do. Take care x

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