To wonder if we’re going to be raising a more resilient generation

[Frigginella]

For years it’s been said that the generations since the war have no resilience because they’ve never known trauma or hardship. AIBU to think this could make our children a resilient generation depending how we behave and show them how to handle it?

Disclaimer I think the term resilience is bullshit and hate the word but thought it an interesting theory.

Optimistic

I doubt you can compare sitting in a shelter to protect yourself from falling bombs with sitting in front of Netflix or social media.

I’m worried that they will have social problems. No real social interaction outside families for 6 months.

I have to be optimistic.
Oh I know @cochineal7 no comparison whatsoever but this is the only event since then that has required any sort of severe measures.

I think for a lot of teenagers they only communicate online anyway so I'm not sure they'll notice the difference..

Cochineal7, you are underestimating the impact ofbthisnon young people and all humankind actually. The ramifications will be enormous. This is going to be an unprecedented journey for us all.

I don't know. It's not real to them. Most of the really young people (under 23) know that even their own parents aren't going to die if they catch it. I said to my son ''but I have asthma'' and his expression gave it away that he thinks that's ridiculous. I wish I had his certainty. I have to go to work, on public transport. I am terrified all the risk I have to take. Terrified that my parents are vulnerable.

I'm afraid that it's the millenials and gen Xers who are coming out of this with resilience. Worrying about ageing parents, disobedient teenagers, still expected at work, still expected to keep the fridge full.

I do wonder whether this will have a lasting, visible effect, probably in different ways for different ages of children. In fact, how could it not? My 20 month old might not see another child for five months, which will surely change his development? He'll also have a lot more time with me but a lot more time where he isn't my main focus - he isn't really used to environments where the adults aren't all primarily focused on him and the other children. I wonder if we'll end up with a generation of self-sufficient introverts...

"I doubt you can compare sitting in a shelter to protect yourself from falling bombs with sitting in front of Netflix or social media."

Depends on the final death toll
and after the bombs stopped falling, people didn't have to keep worrying about infection

Uk civilian deaths for WW1 and WW2 combined were "only" about 70,000
Most of the govt scenarios for Coronavirus are higher

and the world economy soon started to boom again after WW2, whereas a deep global recession or Depression is predicted for the next few years,
with e.g. UK GDP dropping 15% next quarter

(in comparison, the 2008 crisis caused a drop in the Uk of about 5%)

I’m kind of hoping it will bring back community spirit as I’m already seeing. That actually the time away from their friends will make them appreciate being connected in person when they’re allowed to mix again so they might not be so obsessed with technology. They might be less materialistic as they’re not going to be as spoilt. We’re already seeing nature regenerate and the world cleaning itself up so maybe that will inspire us to make changes. Ours are already more involved in keeping the house sorted -cooking, cleaning, gardening. It’s going to be shit and ridiculously hard but I’m hoping something positive at the end of it has occurred.

This idea that the people who lived through WW2 were incredibly resilient is rubbish anyway. They were ordinary people, living through extraordinary times, and there was some serious bravery. But it doesn't meant they didn't suffer trauma and mental health issues that plagued them the rest of their lives. In my experience of that generation they often just defaulted to not really talking about those times.

My grandad was in the RAF so my gran had to move to Acton with her small child. The bombing caused her to have a nervous breakdown and she took tranquillisers for the rest of her life.

Maybe we should stop obsessing about the differences between generations and accept conditions change, but humans will always be human.

Trauma doesn't automatically lead to resilience, though specific ways of dealing with trauma may do. Children need to see their parents dealing calmly with the unforeseen and modelling resilience in small, concrete ways, with the overall message that, yes, things are strange and unprecedented at the moment, and we don't know what's going to happen or when exactly they will go back to school, but that we will figure it out.

I think it depends on their age, hopefully it will lead to all of us the need to help others.

My late dad fought in WW2;
he already had "resilience" through growing up in a poor NE family during the 1920s & 1930s, the Great Depression - never quite enough to eat and the whole family literally barefoot

That just caused him to end up several inches shorter than his much younger brothers and lose all his teeth early
No advantage to him in later years

I also think that it will increase educational inequality, sadly. We know that there's a huge gap when children start school depending on their home environments; no school and no nursery is going to let that widen. To be clear, I'm not arguing that schools should have stayed open to prevent this, but it is an inevitable but sad side effect if they're closed for a long period, as is expected.

Bff I totally agree with you on that. We’re going to see the gap widen and we’re going to see a spike in neglected and abused children which is truly devastating.

There are posters on here that think being told to stay at home is going to give them PTSD, so....

No because from what I've seen from some of the hysterical posts on MN (eg "worried my 3 year old will forget how to play with other kids) a good majority of parents coddle their little darlings . Since most kids learn from their parents most will be learning about selfishness histeria and panic buying

I’m seeing it as an opportunity to learn some harsh life lessons in a (hopefully) calm way

Yes, it’s been a week of hard lessons for dd (17) school has closed half way through a levels.

Has just been let Go from her Saturday job at Debenhams, as she’s a temp and they’ve let all temps and everyone on probation go today.

So she’s she experiencing things I never have in almost 50 years

No one thinks being told to stay at home will give them PTSD. Bit more complex than that.

No because from what I've seen from some of the hysterical posts on MN I agree, same with FB, I think that high levels of anxiety in some parents is being projected and transmitted to children and they will be even less resilient.
For example, missing a prom is a shame, not a devastating catastrophe.

Maybe not more resilient, but a bit more screwed up than the previous generations, my kids are really whiny today they don’t understand the need to stay in the house, my five year old had had lots of tears because of the stress of leaving school and no swimming the little ones just don’t understand, it’s not healthy being cooped up for months on end.

@LisaSimpsonsbff yes totally agree with you on the education point, I live in a poor area not many have computers and Ipads the school work packs have been a bit disappointing, yet my friends who lives in another town got a huge work pack for her children and the lessons are going to be live streamed. It’s heartbreaking the gap between rich and poor is going to get even bigger.