Worst part of parenting **lighthearted **

[nobodylikesacockwomble]

My 12 month old dd is currently teething so I changed quite a few explosive nappies today. Thought that was bad, but then had my first experience of nit combing and shampooing the 7 year old dd this evening and my god that is grim! I'd happily take a poonami or 2 (possibly even a 4am sickness bout) over that again! What's the worst part of parenting for you guys??

My 7yo ds not being able to see his shoes...that are right next to his feet on the floor

Mine are only young so I’m guessing I’m in for lots of grim stuff but so far it’s trying to wrestle them into car seats, prams or shopping trolley seats.
When they really really REALLY don’t want to sit down. I hate having to force them down and the inevitable meltdown that follows.

Vomit. Last time DS threw up, it was after he'd eaten cod. Bleurgh.

Discipline is my other one. We're at the start of testing boundaries and I find it a real struggle letting him have the opportunity to explore and discover while being consistent in discipline and not always being "shouty mummy".

Repeatedly telling the 12 year old the same shit repeatedly...today's one is a monthly discussion.

Me to DD, now remember to move the bin uptown the windowsill in the bathroom, or bring your STs down and put them in the garden bin.
Her, yes mum. Rolls her eyes, mortified.
Me, I'm not trying to annoy you, but you know the dogs going to eat them otherwise.
Her. I KNOW. I'll do IT.
Storms off.
Later that day, maybe the next day, maybe a few days later....
Muuuum. Hes gone in my bin.
The only uncertainty is whether at that point I know or whether I have that to look forward to.

Dear mumsnet users. Sometimes this is a surprise until I see something white hanging out of the dogs arsehole.
What follows next is me walking in front of him, locking knees almost over his shoulders to keep him still, as I hook a dog poo bag over my hand and try to grab the sanitary towel from his arse.
I then look like a dog pervert who's chosen halfway through a walk to interfere with the dog.

Tonight I've told DD if it happens again shes the one who's going to be fishing them from the dogs arse in future, and if it gets lodged in him, it could do some very serious damage. Another eye roll and I KNOW.

No you dont know. The neighbours have seen me pulling all sorts out of the dogs arse! No wonder no one talks to me!

@Apirateslifeforme 🤣 Bloody heck that is funny.
My bugbear is the constant calling of mam in my mind I shout feck off If is not one it is other. I try to hide in the bathroom to Mnet in peace they always find me.

Cleaning up sick 🤢
I was dog sitting my sisters dog, my DD was told the dog wasn't allowed in her room. She went to bed then I heard "muuuummmm", ran up the stairs and the dog was on her bed. DD had been sick on the dog 🙈
I took the dog downstairs slowly and tried to get her out the back door. The dog shook herself as we got to the kitchen and the vomit pretty much hit every surface in the room. I called my husband who was out playing pool to help me but he was in the middle of a game, so I called my dad. In the end my husband, dad and mum all arrived to help me clean up. I was retching for ages. So grim 😱😱😱

The worst parts change as they grow? Poonamis were it for a while 0-2, then 3-5 the endless snot and the fact that every sneeze somehow covered the interior of an entire room in a continuous film of mucus which was also still attached to the offending nostril. 6-9 they seem to pick up so many bugs. The bits are one issue but the projectile exorcist style vomiting was definitely the worst bit.

DS is now 12, and the last couple of years the bane of my life has been the sodding socks. Dirty socks, strewn everywhere. Odd socks, pairs, who fucking knows? And they’re not just dropped where they’re removed either. They are flung, randomly all over the bloody house. I swear if I lifted the carpets there’d be fucking socks under there too.

Always feeling guilty about everything even when you know you're doing your best. So hard:

@hurryupautumn Don't feel guilty you'll regret it when they are cheeky preteens, When I think of the hours I spent playing with DD, keeping her fresh and clean, now she is a cheeky soap dodger, who judging by her face would rather I didn't sit beside her 95% of the time.