Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

Nephews not wanting to go to school - advice please

21 replies

Onionpeeler · 15/03/2020 21:05

I have three nephews. Their dad (my brother) looks after them with the help of my parents. Their mum died five years ago.

My brother is currently in hospital with sepsis. Due to come out on Friday. Parents staying with nephews and looking after them.

Nephews now saying they don’t want to go back to school because they don’t want to potentially pass virus onto recovering dad or g-parents, both fit and health but in their 70s. Two oldest ones have A Levels and GCSEs this year. They are keen to stay off. Youngest one in year 12 keen not to miss school as he will get so bored.

What shall we do?

I’m freelance and all my work has cancelled so I’m potentially free to help out. Is possible my parents could take brother back with them and I stay here to look after boys.

OP posts:

redastherose · 15/03/2020 21:10

That sounds a sensible compromise, you stay and look after the children and your parents isolate with your brother for the time being. You can sort out shopping etc for them. Seems the best option all round.

Beerincomechampagnetastes · 15/03/2020 21:14

Let them stay home, they can revise at home.

Redshoeblueshoe · 15/03/2020 21:18

I'd let them stay at home.

Ididit2019 · 15/03/2020 21:20

What a dilemma. Personally I'd let them stay home too.

Redshoeblueshoe · 15/03/2020 21:35

I have relatives in the same position, they are self isolating. They are making it very structured. So school hours the DC will be studying.
Maybe you could just have the youngest child, so he can go to school.

TaTuirseOrm · 15/03/2020 21:38

Let them stay home, don't take the risk. They've already lost one parent.

CrocodilesCry · 15/03/2020 21:39

This is so hard, poor lads.
But I’m all honesty this is not going to go away in a week or even a month. If they stay off school now they can’t stay off completely isolated for months.
They sound very thoughtful and it’s a real dilemma but unless they are not going to school or mixing with friends for the foreseeable future it’s not going to make any difference

Rainbowunicat · 15/03/2020 21:44

If the youngest is in year 12 why would you need to look after them?

SmallPinkBear · 15/03/2020 21:45

Have they covered all of their exam topics? If not they might not get it done. I think they need to go to school but maybe you look after them and you parents and brother self isolate for the time being....

Witchend · 15/03/2020 21:47

If the youngest is in year 12, how is his brother GCSE year (year 11)

CrocodilesCry · 15/03/2020 21:49

I would imagine youngest is in year 1 or 2 and 12 is a typo.

Merryoldgoat · 15/03/2020 21:51

I suspect OP means 12 yo, one doing GCSEs and one doing A-Levels.

I’d stay with them and let their dad go back with his parents.

Funnyfive · 15/03/2020 22:09

Send them to school, send your brother to your parents.

Original poster

Onionpeeler · 15/03/2020 22:10

Youngest is age 12, year 8

OP posts:

RB68 · 15/03/2020 22:13

The syllabus for Gcse and A levels is not finished yet - they need to isolate GP and Father and stay with you and go to school and if oldest two go then youngest goes too (no point keeping one off)

It may be a moot point anyway if rumours hold true about school closures this week

Aspoonfullofjam · 15/03/2020 22:18

Let them stay at home. If they lived in pretty much any other European county they would already be off school and being told to social distance. The WHO has come out and said what the Uk is doing is reckless. Let them stay home.

Schuyler · 15/03/2020 22:22

Let them stay home. They’ve lost their mum and are probably really scared about their dad and all that’s going on. Poor boys. I’d make sure the older two were doing some revising though, to make sure they keep in a routine and it’ll also keep them distracted.

Mummyshark2019 · 15/03/2020 22:24

I would let me stay home for two weeks so they can be with their dad. Then after that take stock. Schools may be closed by then anyway. If they are not then your brother can move in with your parents and you can look after the boys. But let them at least have a few weeks with their dad before isolation. This is really hard for the children at the moment. They can sense our anxiety and your nephews must feel it more having already lost one parent.

underneaththeash · 15/03/2020 22:48

Your plan sounds like a good one. They have important exams going on that will affect their entire life - this coronavirus will be a distance memory in a couple of years..

Readyme · 15/03/2020 22:48

It would be cruel to separate them from their father they must have been very worried especially after looking their mum.
What does your brother say?

Original poster

Onionpeeler · 16/03/2020 09:55

He’s not really quite up to making the decision - he’s texting us from his hospital bed saying he’d rather they went in but it’s up to us and we should stop bothering him as he’s not well!

They’re at home. It looks like the schools will all be closed soon anyway.

It’s not like I can take them out and treat them to fun things to do as I’m on a total budget now and not sure what’s open to do! Hopefully they’ll be happy with a bike ride .... I think they’re going to miss their friends.

Thanks everyone for your advice, much appreciated.

OP posts:

Flip