...to think this isn't what sick leave is for?

[UserXRay29]

Prepared to be told I'm BU. :).

I work in a small shop, with roughly ten other colleagues. Last year in July, a colleague handed in a sick note, having been signed off for a month. At the end of this month, she handed in an additional sick note and returned in the second week of September.

Myself and the rest of my colleagues thought the timing of this was a bit suspicious, as she has two children in primary school but - none of our business after all. We had to cover her shifts while she was away which was a little taxing but we managed. Upon her return, she explained she'd been away with depression.

As I suffer from depression and anxiety, I asked if she'd tried any medication. Personally, I regularly take both antidepressants and beta-blockers. She answered in the negative and explained that she didn't feel she needed them. Fair enough.

So yesterday, I'm in work with said colleague and discussing childcare, when she brings up that she "doesn't think [she'll] be well again this Summer." I was livid and had to take a minute away.

I suffer with severe anxiety and for someone to use depression as an excuse to take time off work is driving me mental. I get that childcare can be expensive and everything but it feels like it trivializes what I and others have to deal with on a daily basis.

AIBU?

YABU to be annoyed that she’s using the time off to look after her kids under the guise of “health issues” but depression is a valid reason to need time off. To be off every summer is selfish though

Yanbu.

Firstly, sound like she is using depression as an excuse.

Secondly, no that's not what sick leave is for. But you would be surprised.

There was a recent thread about this sort of issue.

Lots of people admitted they used sick day to get down time. It was a thread about 'mental health days' and lots of people admitting to using them when they want a chill out day, rather than using their annual leave.

People do take the piss with sick. Theres no point denying it.

Surely, the pattern of every summer holidays off will show up though?

She could have SAD to be fair. My DF suffers badly during the winter and is just miserable and suicidal the full time. He only snaps out around late February early March every single year.

SAD that only lasts over her schools holiday period, that she can feel coming on in march?

Ha yes SAD that comes on for the school summer holidays. I’m with you OP she’s taking the p. Very rude. (At the moment I’m so terrified of the virus though that I can’t even plan ahead for the holidays so she’s doing well there).

You don't get SAD in summer because there is a lot more daylight.
If she has that bad a depression then she needs to medicate it and try other talking therapies, surely.

Actually, reverse SAD is a real phenomenon. I get it.
I don't take time off work for it though.

I’m surprised if management would accept this again and again. I’m also surprised nobody has told management about these admissions.

I am sorry I pushed YABU by mistake. You absolutely are NOT!! This would massively piss me off too.

Summer SAD is a thing. I have suffered it for many years and have lots of coping strategies for it now. They do help but I dread summer every year. The hot one we had a couple of years ago was particularly awful. However, it does sound like this person is using an excuse due to childcare. Unfortunately I don’t think there’s much you can do about it.

@sairbair
Just go back and click on YANBU. You have one vote but can change it as many times as you wish.

She is taking the piss and should be called on it. However if she was signed off there’s not a lot that can be done unfortunately. I know it’s difficult but let her know that you won’t be covering her if she goes of sick this year.

@UserXRay29 YANBU to be suspicious that she already things she may need summer off and it happens to be the same as last year.

BUT YABU - to compare your mental health treatment pathway with someone else’s. Everyone is different and that’s not helpful. Like you said it’s not really any of your business.

It’s up to management to deal with it, you need to step back for your own mental health. I agree that it is easy to say to a GP that you are depressed, anxious, stressed and be issued a sick note. Not everyone wants medication though.

Where I work six weeks sick is an occ health referral and put on file. However we have two staff members who have never worked the whole six weeks holidays in the past five years. It is a known fact that they will both be off sick for a few weeks, usually four, one of them did manage to be off the whole six weeks once.

It is so unfair on the staff who have to cover, particularly those who also have children.

Should be managed properly you can see a pattern when you look at historical sick leave build a case and sack her. Irrispective of reason not many businesses can function without correct staffing levels.
Sounds harsh but what people doesn't realise shit like this affects the businesses ability to function which can jeopardises the business and everyones job.

@Pixxie7 why would any colleague say that to someone? It could be classed as bullying l

Eurgh. YANBU.

Unfortunately, saying that I (or others) won't cover her shifts would mean nothing. It would cause problems for the management trying to find other cover but wouldn't affect her in the slightest.

Our store manager has changed since last summer so it would be very easy for her to do the same again this year without any major red flags occurring.

She’s taking the piss. I suppose she would only get statutory sick pay each week which is about £90 - she obviously can afford it.
I work in a public sector - if we are sick we get full pay for 6 months,
Some staff really really take the piss - some gps give out sick notes easily, others not so. I feel at my gp I have to beg for one for a week.
It’s annoying but there’s little you can do.

I was signed off for two weeks a couple of years ago. I had people telling me it was ‘well timed’ because it was the two weeks before my wedding. These were the people who hadn’t seen my crying in my classroom every day (teacher) or seen my panic attacks on the drive into school. They hadn’t been in my head when I’d considered crashing my car because it would be easier. Even after I’d been signed off, my mum took me to Hobbycraft with her and I had a panic attack in the shop.

After the two weeks away from the constant scrutiny, I felt better and went back but the feelings soon returned. I haven’t been signed off again since but have come very close a few times.

I’m really on the fence about your colleague as it could be actually horrendously timed as her children were off and she had to look after them whilst feeling awful. The comment about ‘feeling’ like it would happen again make me suspicious though...

Mind your own bloody business. Maybe she had a traumatic event happen to her in the summertime which triggers her depression. Stop gossiping about your colleague. If i was off with depression and found my colleagues had been talking about it id be making a formal complaint.

I think the question about affording to be off sick on SSP can be offset against the increased cost in childcare. Not everyone can get help with costs or afford them up front and will effectively work for less than SSP if they pay for childcare.

Not that I’m advocating people use sick to cover this, but cost is sometimes a consideration.

Mental health is such a grey area and hard to evidence (you tell the doctor how you feel... ). A colleague of mine hates our boss and has taken very long periods off for depression. It is really stressful to cover and I confess I don't always believe her. YANBU

Unfortunately I have known many employees who either cannot afford to arrange or cannot arrange childcare for the summer to be signed off sick - with the stress of trying to juggle it all.

Sadly, being honest with most employers is not really an option.

But it is your business if you are expected to cover for her. I think I would have said something to her although it probably wouldn't have any effect.