How to get ovet embarrassment and speak to gp?

[Setacourse]

This is going to be tmi and i am only on aibu because it's so busy and I'm desperate! Sorry in advance!

I am in my third trimester and had a really sharp pain inside my downstairs the other day. So bad I had to insert my thumb just to try to put pressure on the pain. Sort of how you hold your funny bone when you knock it.
Anyway I felt a lump where the pain was (inside my v) and got myself all worried about it.

I have had constipation quite badly this pregnancy and have to strain. When I was wiping after a particularly difficult number 2 it felt like the inside of my v was sticking out. I called dh to come and have a look (I know I know) because I haven't got a clue what it normally looks like and he saod it looked untidy and like it was sticking out!

Had a look at tge nhs website and it looks like it may be a prolapse (?) And my dh is trying to get me to book in with the midwife or Gp every time I go to call I just put the phone down because I am so embarrassed!

I have had a really bad anxiety in the past and changed doctors and midwives recently a few months ago because I just wanted to see a stranger for this pregnancy (instead of my childrens doctor)
I am only just getting back into going to the shops and going for a walk after a really bad couple of years of completely relying on dh to do this. I was having panic attacks and just ended up staying in or only ever going out with him 'taking the lead' so asking for an internal examination is 100x harder than you can imagine for me.
I only saw my midwife once in my last pregnancy to get my notes and couldn't face her again until after the birth because of my anxiety. Just for some background. And I ended up being admitted to hospital and kept in for a week because I kept fainting and I didn't go to my midwife after the first time.
I am the type to leave it until it gets too bad.
But with a child now to think about, I am more determined to try. But I still can't do it. Does anyone have any tips on how to ease my embarrassment and just ask for help? I really need a magic solution to get some help!

Oh and I have been wetting myself really badly with this pregnancy- not just drips but cupfulls and that has been worrying me too and could also be a symptom?
Sorry its long but I don't have anyone to ask in rl.

So sorry Ribstersgirl. May your daughter rest in peace. My friend is currently undergoing the treatment you describe and is doing well all things considered. I hope you make a full and speedy recovery

@Adviceneededplease9 thats a good idea I will do that
@robstergirl i told my dp about what you posted and he said he will call and come doctors with me

Thank you everyone some great ideas, especially the photo and getting dh to ring for me. Hopefully i can get an apt for when he is off work

@TheLoveOfMoney did you have trouble with wetting yourself or constipation because I am literally having full on wees everyday. In my pants, not making it to the toilet. Even on the school run, luckily it was on the way back and I jad on a long coat. Getting ridiculous now.

OP, as an old gimmer, please get yourself some Tena pants whilst this is all sorted out.

Write a letter for your dh to hand to Dr. Promise me that once this baby is born, you will get help for your anxiety.

And high five for your dh who sounds ultra fab x

@Setacourse I’m so proud of you. Better to be safe than sorry. If you aren’t happy question it. You’re being really brave. I know it’s hard but it honestly can be so much worse. I never, ever, imagined this would be my life. 2 weeks ago we were arguing about which bugaboo we wanted. Now I’m literally fighting for my life and arranging my beautiful miracle babies funeral.

Well done @Setacourse, you can do this!

Well, it could affect your baby (in terms of delivery). Would you rather it was discovered due to you passing somebody a note saying 'I think I've got a prolapse' and perhaps a calm, planned section was performed or it was left until discovered during labour and an emergency one done?

It's not just about you at this point. You have the obligation to take care of the baby you are carrying first and foremost and if that involves being a bit embarrassed, fuck it.

Please do OP, if you find it easier, write it down as you have done in this post. They might not need to look, or do you feel more comfortable with your midwives? Could you speak to one of them?

@Robstersgirl
Bless you. I am so sorry for your loss.

I have a matching scar to yours. It goes higher than what I can see of yours in the picture. Just a word of warning. Take it very very easy for a long time. I am talking years. You have had a lot of pregnancies and the tissue, which holds your stomach muscles in place (fascia) is likely to be weak. Do not lift your children again. You risk going to surgery again. And even again after that. My first surgery herniated and so has the second.

I forgot to say, I am really glad you’re going to the gp. I hope you and your baby will be ok.

Oops that last message was to Setacourse

As a GP I have lots of patients with anxiety who write me lists with there concerns or show me things on phones - just show your original post when you go in. Hopefully they will be able to explain what’s going on.

I had problems with bowel movements, be constipated for days and could feel the poo stuck if I pressed near my vagina. I didnt have trouble with weeing though. I'd leak a little all the time. I felt a lot of pressure in my nether regions, if I lifted my stomach up it would relieve it. I'm a size 18, so not small but my stomach was bigger than normal. (I feared ovarian cancer at first but I wasn't) when lying down the bulge eases. Does it protrude more if you bare down through your vagina?

I had an initial exam at my GPs and she referred me to the consultant specialist. Saw the consultant and he confirmed the prolapse and advised I finished having my family before surgery. Somehow conceived my second child and when she was 2 I had a hyteroplexy, a sling around my uterus that pulled up the bowel and bladder. There are so many prolapses, uterus, bowel, bladder, vaginal wall etc it could be something else but you just wont know till you're checked out.

I was 37 when I had my surgery, it was laparoscopic and a life changer.

Don't google either, the internet will be full of all the horror stories and not the successes.

Book an appointment, get through it any way you can, even if it means crying through the whole thing. The biggest stress is the unknown, I remember feeling so traumatised until I had the proper diagnosis and my options for repair.

From the history you give - constipation /pain/something protruding/urinary incontinence - it could be vaginal and anal varicose veins .
Wishing you all the best at the doctor's tomorrow .