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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To send my kids to school 'sick'?

72 replies

Frume · 08/03/2020 16:13

They are 6.5 and almost 5yo. They both have quite bad coughs and colds. No temps. Not struggling with breathing other than the blocked noses. We live in the South East and have been to London recently. I also have a cough but my partner does not.

Now I don't want to be 'that parent' who keeps their child off when they have a cough or cold.. but obviously amid the whole covid19, I have no idea what I should be doing with regards to sending them in or keeping them off?!

OP posts:
Equimum · 08/03/2020 17:00

Our son. Is the same and I have checked the NHS website. Apparently, if they have a cough and cold without temperature the advice is to send to school as normal. Obviously, if they are really feeling gritty, I would not, but with a standard cough and bunged nose my son’s school would usually expect him to attend.

FWIW, I am planning to call our school office at 8.30 tomorrow morning and see if they still think it’s okay. Could you do the same OP, if your children are reasonably okay in themselves.

cologne4711 · 08/03/2020 17:02

If they have a stuffy nose it's not COVID 19.

If they feel ok, send them in.

If they''re under the weather, don't. It's not difficult really.

FoxEars · 08/03/2020 17:02

Please keep them off

Seriously. Nothing pisses me off more than parents ' dosing up' unwell kids and sending them in to school.

It's not a babysitting service and these things spread like wildfire.

Ozziewozzie · 08/03/2020 17:04

@WorraLiberty That is so true. It’s getting ridiculous.

FoxEars · 08/03/2020 17:07

Earthworm

You are " that parent".

The one who sends your kids in unwell regardless of any thought for them, other children/ teachers or even immune compromised children for that matter.

It's your kids that get the certificate of good attendance each term/ end of year, whilst other parents kids don't get it at all because their parents rightly kept them off. And because their child caught what you sent your children unwell to school with

It's absolute bolllocks and you really
are incredibly selfish and ignorant.

DesLynamsMoustache · 08/03/2020 17:13

Kids get 6-10 colds a year on average so you can't just keep them off every time they have one. But if it's a bad cold, and given the current climate, if you can keep them off then it might be worth it. Generally, though, you can't keep kids off for colds, it just isn't feasible

friendineed · 08/03/2020 17:43

The advice for everyone is to go to work/school if it's just a minor cold. If my kids or myself feel awful, we stay at home. Fever, stay at home. Otherwise go.

ThisMustBeMyDream · 08/03/2020 18:36

My children will be going to school with a regular cold. I will be going to work with a regular cold. Most colds do not stop you doing day to day activities. Me and my children would never be in work/school if we stayed off for every cold we had.

EarthwormJim9 · 08/03/2020 18:40

FoxEars

Get a grip c’mon

Leaannb · 08/03/2020 18:41

@Someonelseentirely In the States we don't much have a choice. If they aren't running a fever or nop d/v they go to school. You can't keep children home for the duration of a cold (3 weeks) and we certainly can't miss work for 3 weeks. With an incubation period of 24 to 72 hours most school.children and workers have already been exposed and the die is cast. No need to keep them home

FlipReally · 08/03/2020 18:42

I send mine in :( they permanently have colds so they would never go to school if the were off! :(

FlipReally · 08/03/2020 18:46

Just asking, besuase I feel really bad now - do the parents who keep their kids home really, honestly, keep them home with every cold? Maybe there's something wrong with mine, that they have colds all the time? Or are people not being entirely honest when they say they keep them off?

gamerwidow · 08/03/2020 18:51

I would send in if they don’t have a temperature and they are ok in themselves. If they’re playing and eating and drinking as normal they can manage a school day.

curlsnotfrizz · 08/03/2020 19:16

depends. are they fine in themselves? If so, mine would go in. I work and have no support who can help out and really only bite the bullet of unpaid carer's leave when they are unfit for school. I don't know many working parents who can afford the luxury to keep kids at home in this circumstances.

PeterPanGoesWrong · 08/03/2020 19:19

Poor little buggers, can’t even enjoy a day at home when they’re poorly! Keep them off! Ring in to your work, tell them you’re poorly. Put your kids well being first.

Original poster
Frume · 08/03/2020 19:30

@peterPanGoesWrong

I'm a SAHM, hence saying earlier in the thread that I am able to keep them home. I just wasn't sure if I esd overreacting by keeping them home.

Their wellbeing absolutely comes first, thank you!

OP posts:
mumtomaxwell · 08/03/2020 19:34

@EarthwormJim9 I know people like you in real life and you all boil my blood. Outside of work (teacher) I care for my MIL who is having chemo. If I get ill I can’t look after her. No one is that special they need to drag themselves to work ill like some kind of martyr. Not even you!

ThisMustBeMyDream · 08/03/2020 19:37

Are you that naive @mumtomaxwell? Plenty of professions are that special that they can't go off sick all the time for their own and their kids colds.

ThisMustBeMyDream · 08/03/2020 19:38

And I'm not even talking about well paid professions that can afford Nanny's or emergency childcare cover.

Bubbinsmakesthree · 08/03/2020 19:42

My two both have regular colds (snotty with a bit of a cough) - they will be in school as usual.

I think my bar for keeping them home will be lower than usual for as long as covid-19 persists, but not to the extent that a mild illness which has no covid-19 resemblance will make me keep them home.

opticaldelusion · 08/03/2020 19:43

Children have on average eight colds a year. Keeping them away from school is completely disproportionate.

modgepodge · 08/03/2020 19:45

If I was off every time I had a cold I’d probably be off about 50% of the winter. Mind you, I am a teacher so perhaps that’s because everyone keeps sending their kids in with colds 😂

I think under normal circumstances going in with a cold is fine, if no temperature and if they can cope with the day without being really miserable or exhausted. Not sure what the advice is with COVID 19 however. I’ve never had an issue with kids coming in coughing or sneezing - if they took a week or so off every time some would barely be in I think. My daughter went to the childminder with a cold a few weeks back and when I asked if she was happy to have her she said definitely, she’s never have anyone there if they stayed off with a cold.

Nousernameforme · 08/03/2020 19:47

For a snuffle and a mild cough no I would send mine in. Last week he caught a nasty bug probably not corona but it meant that he was off all week and tomorrow is touch and go as well.
His temp is down but whatever this is has floored him it might very well be a mild flu. First few days he was napping and even today he was tired by 4 oclock. So although this has every chance of being "just a cold" sometimes they just aren't well enough to go even with a cold.

Nousernameforme · 08/03/2020 19:48

He is 6 by the way and if it had been his older sibling facing gcses he wouldn't have gone in either

Stormyjupiter · 08/03/2020 19:49

Simple cough, maybe ok to send them to school, but you say quite bad chesty cough. Can't you not even decide when you need to keep your kids home, for sake of your children, and for others?

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