To be really low about weight after baby number 2

[Justasconfusedwithnumber2]

Baby 1 I gained about 3 stone. I had a c section and 70% literally melted off with 2 months. I stayed the same size until I went back to work and then it slowly crept on as I hated being back and over ate with less time spent walking/exercising. I gained probably an extra stone before falling pregnant with ds2. I then gained another few stone pregnant as my health deteriorated, I couldn't even do long walks and was signed off work. I ended up over 15 stone at 5ft 6lb. I am now 8 weeks postpartum and 14 at 3lb. I hate how I look. The weight has sat in my face, hands and arms. I take photos of me and my boys and know I will look back in horror. My family send me pictures of me a year or so ago and I look happy and so much slimmer in comparison, it makes me so sad. To make matters more difficult I am currently house bound after having issues with my second section and my house flooding which means I'm home all the time while builders fix the damage. It means I cannot get out easily to walk far. That and the fact I've been so stressed Im really not eating well.

I'm stuck in a rut and just so so sad that I will look back at photos of me and my little ones and see how I've let myself go.

Any suggestions please

I think a lot of people can relate to this.

I'd

1. Be kind to yourself
2. Try and make incremental improvements
3. Food prep where possible
4. Take it day by day

Like pp said, you really need to be kind to yourself at this point. You’ve got so much going on right now. It’s obviously not the right time to try and tackle this when you have health issues and little people to focus on. Try not to let it get you down though. It’s what’s inside you that counts. Maybe later in the year you can try and shift the weight. Good luck.

Hey op, no point in being down about it, focusing on fixing it is the answer, start to think about your eating habits, have you thought about how you would like to loose the weight?

For me keto works, for others it’s calorie counting, or slimming world, or many many other options.

The answer is to come up with a positive action plan and stick to it. Feeling low about it is normal but you know you can fix it, and with every pound lost you’ll feel a sense of achievement.

Would you like to be slimmer for the summer? So say three months? At two pounds a week, that’s eight pounds a month, that’s nearly three stone by the time we are into June. You’d be just over eleven stone. Get to august and you’d be between nine and ten. I don’t know where you want to be.

Something to aim for?

Thanks. I've lost about 6lbs since my 6 week check so some seems to be coming off but I am really not eating well so thats where I probably need to focus. I know I'm stupid but I can't look back at photos already. It's meant to be a special time and memory and I feel like I've ruined it by not looking after myself.

BTW I've always been heavy, but am solid so was a size 10 despite being 11 stone. I know shop sizes mean nothing but my point is I've never looked as heavy as I actually am ifswim.

Yeah I get it, most of us have been there, it can be soul destroying. Hating the way you look wearing stuff because it fits and hides it, not because you want to, it’s shit.

But you can be eleven stone by the summer, don’t stress it, it’s not a huge amount of weight, three stone is doable. You just need to get your head in the game, picture your end goal, and get working on it.

Pick your way of eating. I like to have a piece of target clothing to get into, but I don’t weigh myself. You can do this. You know you can.

Weight loss is probably 80% calories and 20% exercise, so even being stuck in the house you can start to make a real change. There are lots of different eating plans (low carb, keto, 5:2 plus commercial ones) it's a matter of finding one that you like the look of. I have done 5:2 really successfully, and now cook a lot of low carb recipes because I really like them and it keeps the weight off.

I also found taking measurements once a week helped, as sometimes your weight doesn't drop but you find you've lost an inch on your waist or hips and clothes are getting a wee bit looser.

If you can get out of the house even for just a bit of a walk it will boost your mood - and maybe take a vitamin supplement to make sure you're getting enough vitamin D.

@henharrier I agree I think I need to change my mentality with food somehow. I will have a google

I like the Max Lowery 2 Meal Day recipe book, and the 8 Week Blood Sugar Diet recipe book - I just add some rice or pasta or potatoes for those family members that want extra carbs.

There are some helpful MN threads in the Big/Slim/Whatever section too.

Oh OP, many of us will know exactly what you're going through and how your feeling. Ive been here one too many times and I currently have a support thread running in the slimming world section if you care to take a look.
For me I do find slimming world easy but many find keto or the 5:2 plans better. Its what ever you feel will fit in with your life style and every plan is different. I found that changing my attitude towards food helped. Also as hipster as fuck as this sounds... Ive given up weighing myself. My worth isn't based on my weight. I listen to how my body and mind feels. I can tell if ive been eating the wrong things by my energy levels and general mood. What ever you decide to do. You've given birth to 2 amazing DCs and your body allowed you to do that. Be kind to your self.

Do you have room for an exercise bike or cross trainer etc so you can work out whilst stuck at home. YouTube has plenty of exercise videos that are great.

Food wise, meal plan to the last detail and don’t have nothing in to snack on etc so that there’s no temptation.

When you say you’re not eating well, what does this actually mean? Are you having proper meals? What are you eating?do you snack?

Do you also know what is triggering you to not “eat well” . Is it boredom. Unhappiness, stress, Ie emotional or is it something else. Like cravings for sugar?do you have a time of day that is a trigger for you where you eat more?

I mean this gently but you sound very unhappy with how you look but lacking in any motivation to do anything about it. Your posts are not all about what can I do to fix this, more I am unhappy and here are the reasons it’s happened and is still happening.

If you’re not in the mental head space to do something about it right now, then go easy with yourself, and hold off until you are.

You’ve just had a baby so don’t be too harsh on yourself.

Also, you won’t look back and feel sad at the photos if you lose the weight. As soon as you get to a size where you feel comfortable in yourself, pictures where you’re heavier won’t give you any pain. In fact in my experience I actively enjoy looking back on pictures where I was bigger to just see how far I’ve come!
Just start focusing on your diet, I find calorie counting the most effective method and honestly track what you’re having with MyFitnessPal. It’ll come off in no time.

Make a plan on how to get weight back in track. If you can exercise now, you can change your diet. Eat less and eat healthier. That is the only way to lose weight. And when you can start to exercise. You can exercise at home.

Also, be kind to yourself. It takes time to lose the baby weight. With each pregnancy I gain 23 kilos and it always takes me 8-12 months to lose it all. I’m on baby three and still 5 kilos left to lose. I waited 3 months to start going to the gym again. What I did to drop the weight the first three months is eat healthier; drink lots of water and walk when I can.

Yes I am unhappy, its been a very stressful couple of months and it looks like another month to go before i get any normality back. I have tried cutting back, but I'm a bad snacker tbh. And if I have a good few low calorie days it can be quickly followed by a blow out because I've had a bad day. It's no excuse @Bluntness100 I get what your saying. I am trying now to think how I do something about it.

Thank you for your suggestions

Also you still have a very new baby! If my experience is anything to go by you'll continue to lose weight (even if not as fast as you'd like) even if you do nothing -- only time that is really true...

I gained two and a bit stone with baby one. Back to original weight a week after the birth. (C-section)

I gained three stone with baby two from the same (normal) starting point. After a week I had only lost about one stone. After eight weeks I hadn't lost all that much more. And my stomach was a nightmare, still very swollen, scar a mess, weeping, lumpy etc. But slowly it all came off, so was back to where I started within six months. In fact the odd thing was that I then carried on losing weight so ended up being underweight for about six months at the end of breastfeeding.

So just take it day by day, and as the weather's improving (I also had winter babies) you'll be able to go for lots of long walks which made a big difference to my mood, appetite, desire to eat biscuits etc.

My lovely GP used to say it takes 9 months to grow a baby and 9 months to recover.

Are you breastfeeding @Justasconfusedwithnumber2? I found this helped me to loose weight, but more importantly, if you are, please make sure you don’t drop your calorie intake too low otherwise you’ll start to feel even more rotten!

OP I know how you feel, my second baby is 4 months and I was lying in the bath this morning looking at my belly and just generally feeling horrible about it. Its wobbly and covered in stretch marks and I still look pregnant at the wrong angle. I nearly cried tbh.

I will say this though, my dh lost his mum a few years ago. When he looks at the pictures of her holding him as a baby, he doesn't register the fact that she put on weight and struggled to shift it post birth (even though she did), he just sees his mum holding him, and he really treasures those images. Dont let how you feel about yourself stop you from being in pictures with your dc. They wont give a damn about your weight when they are looking back 20 years from now, they will just want to see themselves with the mum that loves them.

Thank you. I understand I may be coming across abit shallow or silly when the reality is I need to get on with it. Yes I am bfeeding. I did with my first too. I guess I took for granted how quickly it all just fell off the first time

I have had a very similar experience, put on two stone with dd, lost one and then fell pregnant with ds. With ds I put on 4 stone and on the day he was born weighed in at 15stone and am 5ft 3inch. So I was obese. My ds is 2.5yeards old and I have lost 4 stone so am now in the overweight category but no longer obese. Realistically I have another 2-3 stone to go. I did this by having smaller portion sizes, no extras, no carbs after 6pm. I cut out all late night snacks, if i am hungry I will have some fruit. I exercise 4-5 times a week at home using cardio and aerobic exercises on YouTube. I do a 45 minute walk to take dd to and from nursery twice a week too. To get the last few stone off I intend to join the gym (once my youngest starts preschool). I drink shed loads of water throughout the day too. Before my kids I was slim so it came as a real shock to me to be so overweight and not feel comfortable in myself. It has been a hard slog for me and i now know i am not someone who the weight just falls off. I would take small steps before starting anything drastic.