AIBU: Home Electronic Control Apps

[EdinaMonsoon]

Apologies... I don’t even know what this kind of thing is actually called but...

During a holiday I took with DC last year, DH took it upon himself to reset the control of all electronic items & the heating system in our home to an app on his phone. There was no discussion & I only discovered this when I tried to turn the tv on for DCs the day after we returned home. I have tried to get on board with this technology but... I don’t want to live a life controlled by my phone: at the end of my working day my phone is left to charge in my studio for the night. I designed all the lighting in the house with dimmer switches so you could manually adjust to suit the mood of the moment & I want to continue to use the sodding switches rather than slide a f*kin scale on my phone. The lowest setting on this app is still substantially brighter than the original dimmer switches so it isn’t relaxing. In addition we have remote controls for the lights in specific rooms so again you can’t just flick switch on our bedside light, for example...you need to find the chuffing control. The app is temperamental & frequently doesn’t connect & it’s not possible to manually override it. I’m not remotely technical so I then have to rely on DH responding to messages & solving issues remotely. I work from home & I think I deserve to have autonomy over my working & living environment.

I have tried to discuss this with DH but apparently I am massively unreasonable & need to relax & go with the technology. I’m not being deliberately obstinate but I honestly cannot see the benefits. AIBU to find this not only infuriating but also incredibly controlling?

Can you compromise with a voice activated system for it all like alexa? I have a smart home and I hate controlling it from my phone, but being able to just say what I want and have it happen is amazing.

I wouldn’t see that as a compromise. I just don’t want my home controlled by tech & certainly not a listening device. What’s wrong with using your hands to control the switches on individual items?

YANBU OP.

I work in IT and I deliberately don't have these systems in my home.

Aside from the fact it's increases dependence on "screens" (what if you run out of data or your WiFi stops working/you lose your phone) you should Google "the internet of things" and also understand the value of your "data".

Essentially more are more household appliances are linked to the internet and many of them do so in an insecure way.

Think about your heating data - it's great to turn it down when you are not in and back on 30mins before you get home but if someone else could access this data it's a clear pattern of when you are not in the house and when you are about to return. Imagine someone hacking that info...

It discloses your lifestyle eg working from home/SAHP etc, when you go to bed, wake up.

Does your DH know what the provider of the app does with this data? If/who they might sell it to?

Any app that doesn't have a manual override is dubious in the sense it's badly written in any case (as per my reasons above if you can't access a screen).

As for controlling - well that's your DH. It's absolutely unreasonable to be in a position that you can't manage your environment unless he is there to assist.

Technology should enhance your life not restrict it and frankly when it comes to walking less than a metre and 5 seconds to turn on a switch vs 5 metre walk and 5 minute hunt to find where I last left my phone I know what's more efficient.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internetoff_things

Have a read - specifically the criticism/controversy section.....

@DeRigueurMortis Thanks for the link. Will read it shortly. You’ve identified one of my key concerns regarding privacy & safety. DH also works in IT & so I’d like to believe he’s done his research but I’m afraid that I’m of the opinion that once this data is out there it is open to abuse - no matter how allegedly secure such systems are.

I just don’t understand why anyone would think that doing any of these tasks manually is so arduous that they should be done by phone instead.