To be so nervous about going to this Meetup?

[phoebesoho]

Haven’t been out and socialised in 8 years, just separated last year from exdh. I’ve joined a few Meetup groups on meet-up.com to make some new friends as I have zero ‘proper ‘ friends and there’s a event coming up in April, I’m nervous mainly because of my weight. I’ve reached a whopping 17 stone, I gained weight because of my depression and the stress from my marriage. I’ve missed out on so much because of my weight, but since separating from exDH, I’ve decided to make an effort now with my appearance and actually go out and meet people regardless of my weight. Bought some new clothes and makeup, and I’ve joined the gym.

But I’m so bloody nervous about this upcoming event, it’s all women and we’re going to meet at a restaurant. I can also see everyone who’ve RVP’ed to the event are all slim and good looking 😢

I go to various meet up groups. I wouldn’t give it a second thought if I were you, nobody’s weight ever registered with me.
Just go and enjoy yourself!

I found meet up groups v friendly - that's the whole point of them .

It’s natural to be nervous, I would be too. But don’t back out. Nobody will give a shit about your weight.

Op, no one is worried what you look like, it’s whether you come and say hello, chat and be nice 😊

The other thing to remember is that everyone at meetups was once in your position, went to their first event/meet-up

It is natural to be nervous especially if you feel a bit self conscious but dont let it stop you. You will probably have a great time. You are doing the right things to make a better life. It'll pay off. Good Luck!

The phrase ‘a whopping 17 stone’ comes straight from tabloids and gossip magazines. It’s designed to make you feel shit. Ok, if you want to change, change, but use more positive language about yourself. Go to the meet-up. Most people aren’t shallow and won’t dislike you on sight because of your weight.

Just had a look at that Meet Up site myself, OP. You’ve inspired me!

Ah, sweetheart, you sound amazing. Taking control of your own life.
Good for you.

You know, I wouldn't even blink If I went to a meet-up, restaurant, whatever, if someone was a bit heavier than me. It's all about the connection...

Go for it! You never know what lovely friendships can flow from it.

Everyone is shy and self-conscious. The trick is to get out there and do it.

I'm 17st (and 4lb) too.
Was almost 18st just a few weeks ago.

Yes, ok, it isn't my ideal weight, but it is what it is and my weight isn't who I am as a person.
Don't judge yourself so harshly
You sound lovely.

Also, it's perfectly normal to be nervous about meeting people!

I promise you nobody, but nobody will care about your weight!

They’ll care about chatting and getting to know you and making friends with you!

Besides, it’s in April. So if you wanted to (and you DON’T have to) you could lose some weight by then!

Just go for it op. And if you want to lose the weight for you then getting out there and building up your self esteem can be a great motivator. x

No one will care , just go and enjoy yourself! People who go to them are seeking friendships/opportunities to socialise and are always very chatty and nice so don’t worry.